Join the JO Club! (Jimmy Olsen 101)

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Are you ready? Yeah. Are you with it? [00:00:02] Speaker B: Yeah. Okay, let's go. You know what to do. The whole world's watching and counting on you. And all you people listening out there. Everybody everywhere. Hang on, hang on, hang on. Welcome to Checkered Past, a loving postmodern examination of the. Go. Go. Check. Branded comic magazines published by DC Comics between February 1966 and August 1967. I'm Dr. Bob and each week I'll be your guide on this trippy tour through 535 mid century masterpieces of graphic noveldom. This week, Superman's pal, Jimmy Olsen 101. Cover date April 1967 cover price, $0.12. Cover artists Kurt Swan and George Klein. Edited by Mort Wisinger. Featuring Olson's time trip to save Krypton. Written by Robert Bernstein. Art by Pete Costanza. Are you ready? Are you with it? Then away we go. Go. Open up your eyes Take a look at the world around you don't you want to lend a helping hand? Try it on for size if you like the feeling about you Come along [00:01:24] Speaker A: and join in with the. [00:01:28] Speaker B: Jimmy is invited to Superman's Fortress of Solitude to witness ceremonies in memory of Superman's home planet. Inspired to stop the tragic events from happening, Jimmy decides to go back in time and stop the destruction of Krypton himself. But the Phantom Zone criminals Jax Ur and Vakox witness Jimmy's preparations. They assist him with his time machine and plant a post hypnotic suggestion in his mind. Confused. The don't worry, I'll be right back with doctor Husband to explain everything. Now, who's the man behind the man behind the mighty Superman? [00:02:08] Speaker A: Oh, who's the guy he can rely on, right? Jimmy Olsen. [00:02:14] Speaker B: Jimmy boy, Jimmy boy Mama Olsen's cry and joy Someday I'm gonna marry you Jimmy boy. The Lone Ranger has old taunt. Oh, yeah, and Batman has young Robin there. But the best sidekick a man could pick is right, Jimmy Olsen. Why, what a fetching new cap you have on. [00:02:42] Speaker A: Well, thank you, thank you. What fetching new eyebrows you're wearing? [00:02:46] Speaker B: Shut your mouth, listener. We got our hair cut yesterday. We have a gal. [00:02:55] Speaker A: I always get my neck waxed when I get my hair cut because I have. Well, my hair grows back on my neck and back pretty quickly. [00:03:04] Speaker B: Yes, and last appointment, she talked me into waxing around my eyebrows because I'm Scotch Irish and I have one giant eyebrow that grows the entirety of my face. [00:03:18] Speaker A: And if left untended, you'll look like your Uncle Dick or your dad who looked like they had prehensile eyebrows. Yes. [00:03:28] Speaker B: So it went fine last time. Well, this time we got the salon and our gal had hurt her back, so she was taking some muscle relaxants and I think she took one too many. She really went to town on those eyebrows. [00:03:44] Speaker A: They're so pretty. [00:03:45] Speaker B: They're very shaped, very shapely. [00:03:51] Speaker A: They're so feminine. [00:03:53] Speaker B: Well, there's nothing wrong with that. [00:03:58] Speaker A: She's very good at what she does. I wouldn't have noticed, really, until you said to me when you went. When I came home yesterday, you said, I think she went overboard on my eyebrows. And I laughed for a solid minute. [00:04:11] Speaker B: You've been laughing for 24 hours. [00:04:14] Speaker A: They're very pretty. [00:04:16] Speaker B: Thank you. She. I think she shared some of her muscle relaxants with the other gals in the shop because they were looney tunes. After you left, they. [00:04:26] Speaker A: Well, I knew it. I was listening to them gossip and carry on over their hair dryers and whatnot, and I thought, my God, the girls are just. [00:04:35] Speaker B: They are ready to bust. [00:04:37] Speaker A: I know. [00:04:38] Speaker B: One of them asked about you after you left. You said, where's that guy that always comes in and gets his neck waxed? And she said, oh, he was just here. You missed him. [00:04:45] Speaker A: Oh, my gosh. Oh, my God, you're famous. Yes, well, last time I was there, I brought my guitar in with me because I'd just come from a lesson, hadn't I? [00:04:52] Speaker B: Did you sing a happy song for the gals? No. [00:04:54] Speaker A: I walked in and then the owner of the salon looked at me with gigantic eyes like, what's he bringing in on AK57? And I almost said. I almost said to her right away, I'm not your boyfriend. I'm not about to bring in a gun with me. [00:05:06] Speaker B: Jesus. [00:05:07] Speaker A: That went dark. Well, we are in West Virginia. [00:05:11] Speaker B: Yes, yes. Carry your gun wherever you go. 711 food line. [00:05:16] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. Do they do this in Florida, too? Carry weapons with them everywhere or they [00:05:22] Speaker B: have open carry in Florida? [00:05:23] Speaker A: They probably do by now. [00:05:27] Speaker B: Speaking of food. Lion. [00:05:28] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:05:28] Speaker B: I'm sorry to tell you they didn't have any 2% milk in a plastic jug. [00:05:34] Speaker A: I saw that. [00:05:35] Speaker B: So I had to get organic in a carton. [00:05:37] Speaker A: I saw that, didn't I? [00:05:38] Speaker B: Well, organic's twice the price, but it was the only 2% I could find. [00:05:43] Speaker A: Thank you. [00:05:43] Speaker B: Unless I got lactose free. Nobody wants that. What else is new? I had my rehearsal today with a little band. For the Little Mermaid? [00:05:53] Speaker A: Yes. And how's that working out for you? [00:05:56] Speaker B: It actually went really well. [00:05:57] Speaker A: Good, good. [00:05:58] Speaker B: Very pleased. [00:05:59] Speaker A: Good, good, good, good, good. [00:06:01] Speaker B: Except for poor Cameron, the drummer. He's seven feet tall and he's got to sit under that. [00:06:06] Speaker A: Does he have to hunt? [00:06:07] Speaker B: Yes. [00:06:08] Speaker A: He does not. [00:06:09] Speaker B: Yes, he does. [00:06:09] Speaker A: You have to find a different place for him. He's too tall. He can't. [00:06:12] Speaker B: There's no other place. [00:06:14] Speaker A: Well, then he needs a lower stool. Poor Cameron. [00:06:16] Speaker B: I know. [00:06:17] Speaker A: He's, like, freakishly tall, like that guy from Veep. Who's the guy? The super tall guy from Veep. [00:06:26] Speaker B: Oh, Jonadan, I don't remember. Yeah, I know who you're talking about. And actually, Cameron kind of looks like him, doesn't he? [00:06:36] Speaker A: Yes, he does. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We'll see. Anything eventful happen this week? Will Butler is fully recovered from his surgery. [00:06:45] Speaker B: Yes. [00:06:46] Speaker A: After multiple trips to the vet to have his bandages changed and daily struggles with him to keep the bandage on. [00:06:51] Speaker B: Yes. [00:06:52] Speaker A: And wearing a Victorian collar, you know, around. He's now fully recovered. He had a growth removed from his leg. And. And he's fine, right? [00:07:05] Speaker B: Yes. [00:07:05] Speaker A: Oh, let's see. Oh, well, we don't need to talk about. I was gonna talk about that house repair thing, but I don't want to talk about it. [00:07:11] Speaker B: No. [00:07:11] Speaker A: Just make me angry. Yeah. What else is there? Well, we've had wild. What? We haven't had wildfires. Canada has had wildfires, and the. The smoke has reached down into our region, which has made the air quality quite bad. And the sun look like a ball of red fire in the, you know, morning hours up into the day, you know, like. And at the end of the day, it looks orange and, you know, when it's still high in the sky. [00:07:40] Speaker B: Sure. [00:07:41] Speaker A: So, but we. We have some rain today, and it looks quite lovely outside, and we're going to be having rain nearly every day for the next week, which will be very, very welcome. So hopefully that rain is extending up into Canada and they're helping them with their wildfires. We watched the game between Argentina and England. [00:08:05] Speaker B: Yes. Match. We call it a match. [00:08:07] Speaker A: Did I say game? [00:08:08] Speaker B: You did. [00:08:08] Speaker A: Oh, I should know better than that. I do know better than that. We should. And that was a lot of fun to watch. Argentina pulled it out. [00:08:16] Speaker B: Not for England, it wasn't. [00:08:17] Speaker A: In the last six minutes. No. And I was actually rooting for both teams. So now you will have rehearsal and I will watch the finals. [00:08:28] Speaker B: If they can do it, you know, they have all the smoke there in New York City. [00:08:32] Speaker A: They're gonna do it. It should be fine. [00:08:35] Speaker B: Well, it'll be fine if everyone gets lung cancer. [00:08:37] Speaker A: It'll be fine. It'll be fine. So we'll do that we'll have that game tomorrow. So I will watched it. I will have watched it by the time you get home from rehearsal. And then written down on my. [00:08:48] Speaker B: In my. [00:08:48] Speaker A: I shall inscribe on my notepad the most important moments to watch. And we'll watch it. [00:08:53] Speaker B: Certainly. They'll have a highlight reel by the [00:08:55] Speaker A: time I get home. Oh, I'm sure. [00:08:58] Speaker B: Well, I wish I could travel back in time and have England win that match. [00:09:04] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:09:05] Speaker B: But I don't have a time machine. Do you? [00:09:08] Speaker A: No, but apparently that's something that one can just dream up. [00:09:12] Speaker B: Well, yeah, we go down to Professor Potter's house, see if he'll whip one up for us. Yes, we're talking, of course, about Superman's pal, Jimmy Olsen. Number 101. Jimmy Olsen's about to travel through time, which he can do because he's got a professor friend that invented a time machine. Also, he has a watch that can travel through time. Where is he going, you ask? [00:09:36] Speaker A: When is he going? Duh. [00:09:39] Speaker B: Well, both questions are valid. It's going to the past on Krypton before it blew up. To try to avert tragedy. [00:09:48] Speaker A: To try, Indeed. [00:09:50] Speaker B: Jimmy Olsen. 101 years ago, the Superman's father, Jor El, predicted a. [00:09:55] Speaker A: Yes, it says April, number 101. April. I'm assuming this is 1967. [00:10:02] Speaker B: Yep. [00:10:03] Speaker A: So that would meant. It meant it would have been written around January of that year. [00:10:10] Speaker B: Well, I don't know when it would have been written. It would have been on sale in March, probably February. [00:10:18] Speaker A: Oh, February. Yeah. Okay. Thank you. [00:10:21] Speaker B: Why? [00:10:24] Speaker A: I'll tell you when we get to it. [00:10:26] Speaker B: Wait, I can tell you exactly when it went on sale. On sale date, February 28, 1967. [00:10:32] Speaker A: Why do they put the dates months in advance? [00:10:34] Speaker B: Because when they were selling things in drugstores, you know, and Paul Kent. Now that the five and dime wouldn't know what things were new and what things were old. And so if they saw on the old issue of Jimmy Olsen on the stands, if it was February but it said April, they'd think, oh, well, this is brand new, so they didn't throw it out. [00:10:58] Speaker A: Oh, okay. They would throw out old comics. [00:11:02] Speaker B: Yeah, okay. Probably. Or rip the covers off and send them back for a refund or something. I don't know how it all works. [00:11:08] Speaker A: Okay. All right, let's go. [00:11:13] Speaker B: Years ago, Superman's father, Jor El, predicted his world Krypton would explode. But no one believed him. He was a modern day Cassandra. It doesn't really say that. Of course, it's too late to Save long dead Krypton now. Or he is it. Jimmy Olsen's willing to give it a try. So back he goes into the past for a desperate gamble to change history. With billions of lives at stake in Olson's time trip to save Krypton, he's here on the splash page. He's drawing the American English Alphabet and Arabic numerals on a chalkboard, which apparently is still used on ancient Gripton. [00:12:01] Speaker A: I can almost remember the Arabic names for all the numbers. Wahed it name. Dalata, Araba, Hamsa, Sete, Saba, Tamania. [00:12:14] Speaker B: Zero. [00:12:16] Speaker A: No something stream. I can't remember what it is. [00:12:20] Speaker B: Yeah, well, you can Google it later. One day, as cub reporter Jimmy Olson gets a handshake from Perry White, Daily Planet editor. Great dog. Shows story, Jimmy. Lots of laughs in it. [00:12:36] Speaker A: Thanks, chief, but how about a raise? My landlord, my landlady sort of prefers cash to press clippings. [00:12:43] Speaker B: Just then, Jimmy hears a humming sound from the roof. It seems he's prearranged with Superman that a space capsule is going to arrive on the roof of the Daily Planet and take Jimmy somewhere that Jimmy's not, doesn't know where. So in he gets. There's no windows, so he can't see where he's going. The capsule streaks north to what we of course, recognize as the Fortress of Solitude. Solitude, which has a giant key shaped as an airplane plane marker, which apparently is able to move on its own rather than be directed by Superman or Supergirl. Yes, there is some kind of little machine there on the ice that apparently is moving it. [00:13:34] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:13:36] Speaker B: So Jimmy gets inside the Fortress of Solitude, the space capsule opens up. Of course, Jimmy's been at the Fortress many times, so he knows immediately where he is. He comes upon a fantastic clock and a message attached to it. [00:13:51] Speaker A: In large print. [00:13:51] Speaker B: In large print with instructions from Superman. Dear Jimmy, I've brought you here to witness what no other human eye has ever seen. Follow my instructions. Explicitly signed Superman. [00:14:05] Speaker A: Presently, as Jimmy reads the man of Steel's directions, Superman has set up remote controlled devices so I can film what has become a special Memorial Day observance for all survivors of his home world, Krypton. When the clock strikes 5 o', clock, a ceremony will begin making the anniversary of the destruction of Krypton. Oh, it was a joyous occasion. [00:14:28] Speaker B: Yeah. Now this whole issue goes very dark. [00:14:32] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:14:33] Speaker B: And I looked up. It was written by Robert Bernstein. [00:14:41] Speaker A: Okay. [00:14:42] Speaker B: Who has written one other story that we have covered on this podcast. It was a Supergirl story where a criminal somehow suspected that Clark Kent was Superman. So he got plastic surgery to look like Clark Kent. And when he encountered Supergirl, he ordered her to change into her secret identity, thus revealing her secret identity of Linda Danvers and confirming his own suspicions that Clark Kent was Superman. [00:15:19] Speaker A: Wow. [00:15:21] Speaker B: However, at the end of that story, they were criminals, of course, and they got exploded by a bomb and killed. And that's how Supergirl got out of it. [00:15:31] Speaker A: Wow. [00:15:32] Speaker B: Yeah. So this story goes very dark. As you are about to see, the clock strikes the hour, and just as Superman has instructed Jimmy, the first lexiscope there in the fortress is transmitting pictures from this bottle city of Kandor, which, as everyone knows, was stolen from Krypton by Brainiac, who shrunk it and placed it inside a bottle. So Jimmy is full of filming. Now, they didn't have VCRs then, so he has to film right directly from the TV screen. Make kinetoscope or something. Now, the Kandorians first observe a moment of silence to commemorate the annihilation of their homeworld. Now they're all looking skyward at a model of Krypton. A Kandorian gentleman is riding a monstrous white bird because he's playing the part of Dakkar Ra, who is the Paul Revere of Krypton, who warned the population about a sneak invasion from another world by mounting a winged. Well, it looks like a dragon to me, but they call it a bird. [00:16:51] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:16:54] Speaker B: So he gets on this. Thing, flies up into the sky with a lit torch to the model of Krypton, which is equipped with a fuse. He lights the fuse, and the model of Krypton explodes, just as the real Krypton did, to the joy of the population of Kandor. [00:17:28] Speaker A: No. They observe silence. [00:17:30] Speaker B: Yeah. So is there not a better way to commemorate the destruction of your entire planet than by recreating it visually? [00:17:41] Speaker A: I mean, they're going on hard on this. You know, you could actually have someone read it. Read it. Or it could have been interpreted in a play. Yeah, yeah. [00:17:51] Speaker B: Or you could just. The moment of silence, I feel is fine. [00:17:55] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:17:57] Speaker B: Or maybe have, like, a craft fair or a, you know, food truck. [00:18:03] Speaker A: I think a formal silence. You don't need to reenact the destruction of a planet. [00:18:08] Speaker B: No, this would be like. [00:18:09] Speaker A: Like 9 11. [00:18:11] Speaker B: Like, re making a model of the Twin Towers and flying model planes into them and having them collapse. [00:18:19] Speaker A: I was thinking the same thing when I read this. I thought, this is a little. This is a bit dark and unnecessary. Yeah. [00:18:23] Speaker B: And this is not even the end of the darkness. We're on page three. [00:18:27] Speaker A: Yeah. So Then we move forward. Moments later, as the other monitors screens light up. [00:18:33] Speaker B: Apparently, at some point in the past, Superman and Supergirl and Crypto converted an uninhabited world in a distant solar system into an exact duplicate of Krypton, populated by robots of the dead population of Krypton. [00:18:51] Speaker A: So it's like Roadside America in Pennsylvania used to be, except the size of a planet and filled with robots. [00:18:57] Speaker B: Yes, yes. [00:18:58] Speaker A: Now, I don't suppose we've talked about Roadside America before. It was a giant building, model train museum, one of the best things ever created in kitschy history, American history ever. [00:19:09] Speaker B: So I think we talked about it last week. [00:19:10] Speaker A: Yes. It's no longer in existence. [00:19:11] Speaker B: It is not. But if you go to, I will provide a link. Cause we did visit it on my blog and we've got a video of us visiting it. [00:19:24] Speaker A: It was wonderful. We went probably three times. [00:19:28] Speaker B: So they created robot duplicates, including Jor El Lara and a baby Kal El. I guess we couldn't have let the population of Candor out of the bottle and they could set up shop there on this duplicate planet. [00:19:46] Speaker A: Well, I was going to ask about that, and I thought I'd just keep my mouth shut, which is something I don't usually do. But now I will ask. Yes, why, oh, why do the people in the bottled city of Kandor live and remain in a bottled city? [00:20:03] Speaker B: Well, because they're microscopic sized. And so the bottle city of Kandor is just sized perfectly for them. And as you remember, Superman is a dick. And so if they were let out of the bottle on Earth, they'd all have superpowers, which, in fact, he does have a gang of Superman emergency squad members that do come out of the bottle and are able to grow to, like, 6 inches for that purpose. [00:20:38] Speaker A: But then they have to just take them to another planet and allow them to live. [00:20:41] Speaker B: You think so? And in fact, eventually that's what he did. I think that the Logic in the 60s was that they were waiting for a way to find out how to enlarge them. [00:20:54] Speaker A: Because nothing, no science like that is even possible in this universe where people travel back and forth in time at will. [00:21:03] Speaker B: No, no, no. [00:21:06] Speaker A: All sorts of scientific marvels happen within DC Comics. But bringing the people inside the bottled city of Kandor to actual life size is not possible. [00:21:16] Speaker B: No. Now, why they couldn't just bring them to this duplicate of Krypton and maybe make the duplicate of Krypton tiny size? [00:21:29] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:21:29] Speaker B: So that they could feel at home there? [00:21:32] Speaker A: I mean, it is essentially an amusement park just for just. No, it's an amusement park for Superman, Supergirl and Krypto. [00:21:42] Speaker B: Yeah, that's it. [00:21:43] Speaker A: They're the only ones who can travel there. And it is a world set up of robots to reenact the world that blew up. It is solely for their own amusement. I mean, robots are not sentient beings. So it's not like this is a society that is evolving. [00:22:01] Speaker B: Well, aren't they? Then why do they all of a sudden start punching each other? [00:22:04] Speaker A: Which they can be fixed by Superman running around and flipping some switches. [00:22:08] Speaker B: Yes, it seems that the robots all of a sudden start rioting, going berserk. Superman decides it's because the weather tower regulating the duplicate planet's atmosphere. If they're robots, why does it need a regulated atmosphere? [00:22:25] Speaker A: Probably so the acid rain doesn't melt their artificial skin off their robot bodies. [00:22:28] Speaker B: Well, it's affecting the chemical balance of the androids, changing them from peaceful to quarrelsome. Superman can fix it. Don't worry. If only. All of the ills of Earth could be corrected so easily, Superman thinks. [00:22:44] Speaker A: Mm. [00:22:46] Speaker B: Well, all's well again. Superman wants to know if Jimmy got it all on film thousands of light years away. [00:22:53] Speaker A: I love this. Wait, let me do this. There. All is well again. Did you get it all down on film? Jimmy, answer. I have my super hearing tuned into you. [00:23:04] Speaker B: Yes, Superman. Good. Because there's a lesson in this duplicate world that I'd like Earth to learn. See, my father, Jor El, and my mother, Lara, these are just their synthetic doubles. The originals and Krypton are gone for good. And a nuclear war could do the same to Earth. So let the great powers take heed. Oh, you were asking about what was happening. No, Cuban Missile Crisis. [00:23:36] Speaker A: It was 1962. Yeah, so I looked that up before this podcast because I was thinking, what. Cause this is the panel, right? Yeah. And the nuclear war could do the same to Earth. So let the great powers of Earth take heed. So I was like, okay, Cuban Missile Crisis. Well, that was 1962. Okay, so that was like, civil rights. This isn't about civil rights. That would be 1965. Like, sort of things. Everything really, really coming to a head in 1965. What was like, what major worldwide event happened in early 19, late 1966, early 1967. And I couldn't find. [00:24:11] Speaker B: So other than Vietnam, there's that famous commercial with a little girl picking daisies in the field. Linda Johnson. But that was 64. Yeah, I don't know, maybe it was just in the zeitgeist. Yeah, it's awfully heavy handed. It is all right. Superman orders Jimmy to put the story of our agony on your front page. Maybe it'll choke. Prevent foolish mankind from destroying itself. I don't know, Superman. Maybe you could help keep people from destroying their planet because you have all the powers in the universe. [00:24:55] Speaker A: Jimmy thinks, what a tragedy. If only it could have been prevented. Prevented? [00:25:00] Speaker B: That's it. [00:25:01] Speaker A: Just as Superman wants to avert a nuclear catastrophe on Earth maybe I could go back into the past and prevent Krypton from being blown up. Gee, Jimmy, I'm sure no one ever thought of that before. [00:25:12] Speaker B: Think of all the lives I'd save, the grief I'd be sparing Superman. I'll travel back in time to before the catastrophe. Then I'll become greater than Dakkar Ra because I'll change history and save Krypton from extinction. Well, if you save Krypton from extinction, Jimmy, there will be no Superman. And how are you gonna get back? [00:25:29] Speaker A: Yeah. Your life's gonna be quite different, Jimmy. [00:25:31] Speaker B: So he borrows a stack of books from Superman's Krypton reference library to bone up on all the knowledge he can. Right. [00:25:42] Speaker A: I'm assuming he's going to learn Kryptonies. If he doesn't already know it. [00:25:46] Speaker B: Sure, sure, sure. [00:25:47] Speaker A: Oh, they call it Kryptonian. [00:25:49] Speaker B: I believe it is. Kryptonies. He arrives back at the roof of the Daily Planet and thinks, hey, Professor Potter can build me a time machine. He's done it before. He has, apparently. [00:26:01] Speaker A: Okay. [00:26:03] Speaker B: He'll arrive on Krypton dressed as a Kryptonian, speaking their language. No one will dream I'm from Earth. That night, as Jimmy puts the finishing touches on his story and writes captions [00:26:14] Speaker A: for the pictures he took Clark Kent says, terrific shots. You've never done better, Jimmy. [00:26:19] Speaker B: Thanks, Clark. Listen, do you think it's possible to go back in time to prevent an historical tragedy? [00:26:26] Speaker A: Asking for a friend, he says, you mean reverse history? Prevent the burning of Rome or the Civil war? Forget it, Jimmy. No one can change the past. And he thinks to himself, as Superman, I've often tried and failed. [00:26:39] Speaker B: Yep. Which, Jimmy thinks, just the reply one would expect from mild, unimaginative Clark Kent. [00:26:46] Speaker A: Okay, I was just wondering. [00:26:48] Speaker B: Days later, at a drive in movie where they're showing sensational newsreel pictures taken by Jimmy Olsen of the anniversary of [00:26:54] Speaker A: Krypton's destruction at the Drive in theater. And that's good old Lucy Lane with him. [00:27:00] Speaker B: Right, Lucy Lane. She's expecting to have to pay half the entry fee. But Jimmy just got it. He got A raise. [00:27:07] Speaker A: We used to go to the Drive in theater when I was a child. And as you know, we were very poor. [00:27:11] Speaker B: Yes. [00:27:14] Speaker A: And my mother. There were some times when I had my step siblings with us in the summer. And so my mother would have the two smallest of us get down on the floor, the seat of the car, and they'd put blankets over us. And then my sister and my stepbrother would sit up in the back seat. So they would pay for two children and two adults, and the two other children would not be paid for. [00:27:44] Speaker B: I'm surprised they didn't shove you in the trunk. [00:27:47] Speaker A: I'm surprised that I've never told you that before. [00:27:49] Speaker B: You have told me that before. [00:27:50] Speaker A: I have? [00:27:50] Speaker B: Oh, yes. [00:27:51] Speaker A: Oh. [00:27:53] Speaker B: But I don't think you've told listener. So. [00:27:54] Speaker A: Okay. [00:27:56] Speaker B: And tell what movie you got to see at the drive in when you were four years old. [00:28:00] Speaker A: The Exorcist. [00:28:01] Speaker B: The Exorcist. Listener, four years old, terrified. Really? [00:28:08] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:28:08] Speaker B: I didn't think it was that scary. [00:28:10] Speaker A: Do you know what the worst, the scariest movie was that I saw at the Drive in theater? [00:28:14] Speaker B: What? [00:28:15] Speaker A: Michael Caine's the Hand. [00:28:18] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [00:28:19] Speaker A: Where he somehow gets in an accident and he loses his hand. [00:28:22] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:28:23] Speaker A: His hand haunts him. [00:28:24] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:28:25] Speaker A: And comes back. [00:28:26] Speaker B: Oh, I thought he. Didn't he get a replacement hand that had been a criminal's or something? And the criminal hand was committing murders. Is that something else? I don't know. I don't. [00:28:38] Speaker A: I thought his hand just crawled along like a hand. Like a spider after him or something like that. Well, we're gonna have to watch it. All I know is, like as a child, I was. I remember sitting in the backseat of the car, pulling my feet up from the floor because I was afraid the hand was underneath the seat. I was way too young to be watching those movies. Sure. [00:28:57] Speaker B: Well, you turned out all right. All right. [00:29:01] Speaker A: I have the darkest humor of anybody I know. I don't think I turned out all right. I like Amy David Sedaris. Dark humor. You think I turned out okay? [00:29:10] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:29:10] Speaker A: Okay. [00:29:11] Speaker B: I wish he were as rich as Amy Sedaris. All right. The whole audience is stunned to see Superman weeping on screen. But Jimmy's on the job. He's boned up on everything you need to know for his time journey. If only this miniaturized, transistorized time machine trophy that Superman gave me last year only worked, I wouldn't have to go to Professor Potter. But as Jimily Jimmy. Jimmy wistfully fingers the broken gadget. His thoughts and actions are observed by Two figures floating in an eerie, timeless dimension. It's Professor Varox and Jaxer, villains from the Phantom Zone. [00:29:54] Speaker A: I'm not crazy about the Phantom Zone as you know. [00:29:56] Speaker B: Why? [00:29:57] Speaker A: I just don't like the idea of criminals being banished to a phantom dimension to live out for all eternity. Being able to talk to each other and. And supplant thoughts into your head. [00:30:10] Speaker B: Well, remember, they were not intended to be there for eternity. They had sentences to serve out. And then Krypton exploded. [00:30:19] Speaker A: Oh, that's right. But doesn't Superman still enforce the Phantom Zone sentences? [00:30:28] Speaker B: Well, yes, because he has a Phantom Zone projector. He has a Phantom Zone projector. But now if he lets dangerous criminals out of the Phantom Zone, on Earth they'd have superpowers. [00:30:40] Speaker A: But even though it was, I mean, he hasn't found a way to morally fix this, right? To do the right thing. Because these people who are to serve specific sentences are now doomed to be in the Phantom Zone forever. [00:30:55] Speaker B: Yeah, I guess it would be too easy to take them to this duplicate of Krypton that he created and let him off there. Sure, they wouldn't have powers. [00:31:03] Speaker A: Put them on fucking Mars, [00:31:06] Speaker B: they'd have powers on Mars. [00:31:08] Speaker A: They would. Yeah, [00:31:11] Speaker B: yeah. I don't know. [00:31:11] Speaker A: So essentially it is a form of capital punishment. It's a form. [00:31:15] Speaker B: Well, they're not dead. [00:31:16] Speaker A: They're not dead, but they're sentient. Forever. They're sentient and non corporeal. Yeah, it's like purgatory. [00:31:25] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, but they can spy on anyone and use their mental powers. [00:31:30] Speaker A: They can't experience anything like we can in flesh and bone. They can't like have tea or coffee or sex or watch movies or. I guess they can watch movies. [00:31:40] Speaker B: They can watch movies and they have cats. Remember the Phantom Zone? Cats that fought crypto. [00:31:49] Speaker A: Yes. What did those cats do to be put into the. [00:31:54] Speaker B: You were evil cats. Evil cats. They probably bit and scratched their daddies in the morning at breakfast time. Like a certain cat I could name. [00:32:09] Speaker A: Okay, let's get back to the story. [00:32:11] Speaker B: All right. Well, we do learn that Jaxer is serving a life sentence because he shot a nuclear missile. [00:32:18] Speaker A: But whose life? [00:32:19] Speaker B: His. [00:32:20] Speaker A: His. Kryptonian. The normal life on Krypton or for all eternity. [00:32:25] Speaker B: Oh, well, it has to be eternity because he's in the Phantom Zone now. Yeah, Mon El is in the Phantom Zone for a thousand years. [00:32:31] Speaker A: Wow. What'd Mon El do? I can't remember. [00:32:35] Speaker B: Well, he was lead. Is like Kryptonite to him. And so when he got to Earth, he was Getting lead poisoning. And he was dying. And so Superboy put him in the Phantom Zone until such time as a cure for lead poisoning could be developed. Which it was in the 30th century by brainiac 5. [00:32:52] Speaker A: Okay. [00:32:53] Speaker B: And then they let him out and had him join the Legion. [00:32:56] Speaker A: Was he conscious that entire time? [00:32:58] Speaker B: For sure. [00:32:58] Speaker A: Oh, poor thing. [00:33:00] Speaker B: Well, he was a bulwark against the evil of the other Phantom Zone criminals. [00:33:05] Speaker A: Oh, was he? [00:33:06] Speaker B: Yeah. All right. Jimmy's getting a disguise out of his trunk. Anyway, Jaxar. Yes, he shot a nuclear missile at what he thought was a meteorite to test it, but he actually shot it at an inhabited moon of Krypton. [00:33:24] Speaker A: Idiot. [00:33:26] Speaker B: So Jimmy's got a Kryptonian outfit. Of course, he's got anti gravity boots, which he'll need when he gets to Krypton with its heavier. [00:33:32] Speaker A: Good luck with your arms, Jimmy. [00:33:34] Speaker B: Gravity. [00:33:35] Speaker A: I mean, we both know what it's like to be a little bit light in your loafers, but if you're on a planet with heavier. With heavier. What is the word I'm looking for? Gravity. Heavier gravity. Lifting up your arm to your face is going to be a little bit more difficult than it would be on Earth. [00:33:52] Speaker B: All right, now, Jaxer and Vaycox are projecting their mental thought energies. Are they going to kiss? [00:33:58] Speaker A: Please? [00:33:59] Speaker B: Looks like it. They're going to influence Jimmy to, number one, fix the little time gadget wristwatch. Number two, they're putting a special suggestion in his head which we don't learn about yet. [00:34:14] Speaker A: Yet? [00:34:16] Speaker B: Well, here goes. Jimmy's gonna twist the time adjuster to send him to the outskirts of the city of Kandor just before Brainiac reduced it to bottle is not only a time machine, but also can project him across vast distances of space. [00:34:30] Speaker A: How come neither one of us has commented yet on the fact that Jax, er, looks like he's wearing an adult diaper? Well, a very obvious. Oops, I crapped my pants. Adult diaper. A full adult diaper. [00:34:46] Speaker B: It was not worthy of comment. [00:34:48] Speaker A: Okay, I'm sorry. You can always count on me to sidetrack our conversations with ephemera. [00:34:54] Speaker B: Well, Professor Vacox is wearing a bathrobe or something. All right, an instant later, Jimmy arrives in Kandor just before Brainiac collected it. And now, to see if I can change history, he starts ranting at a couple of cops. Amazingly, these are. Wait, I can't see it now. Oh, yeah, I see it. I'll get to that in a minute. He tries to convince him that Brainiac's about to come and Take Kandor and shrink it, and they don't believe him. And suddenly, here he comes. Brainiac's ship, just like Jimmy said. [00:35:33] Speaker A: Is that all he's taken of Kandor? Just that there's no land on which for them to farm. Well, why did he take Kandor? [00:35:45] Speaker B: That was his thing. He took cities from all over the world. [00:35:47] Speaker A: Oh, okay. [00:35:48] Speaker B: Or all over the galaxy. Now all that's left of Kandor is a huge excavation. Well, Jimmy failed. Next stop, click. Kryptonopolis. When Superman was a baby, Kal El and his father, Jor El, was a member of the Science Council. This is what I was gonna say. These Kryptonian cops, apparently are Irish. Fates preserve us. Last week, when I was trying to [00:36:13] Speaker A: do that Irish accent, I couldn't do it. And I was going to. Yeah, give me a second. And then I did a pretty good. A pretty good Irish accent. [00:36:24] Speaker B: An instant later, Jimmy arrives at the Science Council chambers where Jor El is trying to convince the population that the whole planet's gonna blow up. [00:36:32] Speaker A: Uh huh. [00:36:33] Speaker B: Uh. But they're not believing Jor El. So Jimmy's gonna go back in time a few days. Holy cats. He lands near the firefalls, where sparks have carried. The winds have carried sparks to ignite a nearby village. Well, if you're gonna build a village next to a wall of flame, you have to expect things like that. [00:37:00] Speaker A: Yes. Why would someone do that? [00:37:01] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:37:03] Speaker A: These people aren't very clever, are they? [00:37:05] Speaker B: No. [00:37:05] Speaker A: I mean, for such an advanced civilization, they aren't very clever. Why would you build a city, a village, next to a wall of flame? I know you just said that, but I mean, really, folks, before we move on, why would you do that? [00:37:23] Speaker B: Plus, think of the heat. [00:37:25] Speaker A: It's called firefalls. Yeah, that'd be like building an entire civilization around the rim of an active volcano. [00:37:33] Speaker B: Yeah, well, people have done that, actually. [00:37:36] Speaker A: Mm. So I was just looking up something on the interwebs. Yes, I was curious about. I knew that opolis, the suffix opelis, meant it was Greek, but I couldn't remember what it meant. It means city. Or city. State polis. P, O, P, O, L, I, S. [00:37:55] Speaker B: Yeah, I knew that. You could have just asked me. [00:37:57] Speaker A: Well, then I wouldn't have been able to contribute anything else to this conversation. [00:38:01] Speaker B: You can contribute. The refugees fleeing in panic and robot firefighters show up shooting foam out of their armholes. [00:38:09] Speaker A: Armholes. [00:38:12] Speaker B: Emergency shelters are erected outside the village. Jimmy blends in with the refugees and was going to pretend to have amnesia so he doesn't have to answer any questions and can't pinpoint any friends or relatives. Well, they put some kind of a helmet on his head so that he can be assigned his rightful place in society. It's a personality computer, which is going to tell. That's the sorting hat. Yes, That's where all redheads go, Right? [00:38:44] Speaker A: Right. [00:38:45] Speaker B: Turns out Jimmy has an Gryffindor. Jimmy has an aptitude for science. Oh. Since you're temporarily without a job and a home, we'll make you a Science council page and house you with Dr. Zacklor. Good thing Jimmy boned up on Superman's books of Kryptonian science. [00:39:04] Speaker A: That sure did the trick that afternoon in Kryptonopolis. Welcome home, lad. I can use a brilliant assistant in my laboratory. This is my daughter, Miri. [00:39:15] Speaker B: Say, she's a real looker. [00:39:18] Speaker A: Boy, he must have Doctor. What is his name? [00:39:21] Speaker B: Dr. Zack Lord. [00:39:22] Speaker A: He must have had a very attractive wife because there's no way that creepy guy could have made a daughter looking like that. [00:39:27] Speaker B: Now, not only is Miri beautiful, she's the most beautiful girl Jimmy's ever seen. Now he has an extra special personal reason for saving Krypton from destruction. [00:39:37] Speaker A: Now, part two. Krypton's last chance. The next morning, at Dr. Zach Lore's [00:39:43] Speaker B: home, Miri's getting up from the breakfast table to head out. Where are you going, Miri? You said you had the day off and promised to spend it with me. [00:39:51] Speaker A: Something unexpected came up where I work. I won't be long. Care to come with me? [00:39:55] Speaker B: A girl working Krypton is advanced, all right. She gives him a scuba suit because apparently she works at the bottom of the sea at the Submarine Palace. And her father wants her to go hunting with some experimental weapons. Now, as they dive, Miri explains via undersea radio because Jimmy's pretending to have amnesia. As any school child knows, we use all our natural resources, even those underwater. We mine the ocean seabeds for precious fuels and minerals. She works in the mining division where some shafts are 50 miles deep. Well, look at here. They're harvesting seaweed from the seafloor. They have a little underwater train. [00:40:50] Speaker A: It's just like on land. Except it's underwater. [00:40:53] Speaker B: Yes, a few hours later, back on land, where they have these hunting weapons. Jimmy's very confused. Aren't we Kryptonians supposed to hate killing? Yet here we are in the jungle, stalking wild game. Quiet. [00:41:06] Speaker A: I just spotted a tetra headed tiger. [00:41:08] Speaker B: That means four. You know, tetra. It's got four heads. The tiger attacks and Miri says Don't worry. My father taught me how to use this new rifle. She shoots the rifle. Jimmy thinks she's killed the tetra tiger, but it turns out, no, she's just frozen it. Wouldn't that be fun sport to just go and find an animal and shoot it and have it frozen in place for 16 hours? [00:41:36] Speaker A: 16 hours. Of course, I always think of biological functions and I'm like, does that mean that this thing has its metabolism stopped or is it frozen there and its metabolism internally hasn't? And where's it gonna do its business? How's it gonna do its. [00:41:52] Speaker B: Right out its back end there? [00:41:54] Speaker A: I guess so. Well, anyway, it's frozen. [00:41:57] Speaker B: It's frozen for 16 hours. After 16 hours, it comes to and resumes its normal life. [00:42:02] Speaker A: I bet that's a lot of fun. You would your buddies go out with your rifles and shoot giant prey animals and just watch them stand there. Yeah, yeah. Frozen. [00:42:12] Speaker B: Now. Do you think I'm so vicious, Jimmy? All right, now let's look in on the Phantom Zone villains in the present day. They're observing Superman on another mission. Well, you'd think if they. If Jimmy succeeded that they would have not be in the Phantom Zone anymore. So I don't know why they think they. I don't know why they think that anything's happened, because nobody thought that through. All right, there's the dog sitter. Okay. [00:42:55] Speaker A: Next door. Dog sitter. I haven't seen. [00:42:56] Speaker B: Yes. Oh, I have to see her plenty because, you know, I spy through my work window. All right, back to Krypton. Jimmy and Miri are going to Kryptonopolis because she's going to show him where Jor El lives because Jimmy has to see Jor El alone. But suddenly, as Jimmy boards the monorail train, ye gods. He just realized. He starts yelling at everybody to get off the train. It's going to crash. And someone says, you're crazy. We've never had a monorail accident on Krypton. It's our safest mode of transportation. [00:43:33] Speaker A: Yeah. He tries to pull the brake, but they won't let him. [00:43:36] Speaker B: No. Jimmy says, you're fools. It's in the records. The 730 Express to Kryptonopolis, it plunged into the bay. And it just so happens the monorail is over the bay right now. So Jimmy pulls the emergency exit, flings himself and Miri out into the bay. They land in the water just as the monorail rail breaks in half, plunging the monorail into the bay and killing all the Dodge. They drown horribly because they're trapped in the cars? [00:44:15] Speaker A: Yes. [00:44:19] Speaker B: Jimmy and Miri swim to shore. Jimmy says, we can't save them, Miri. They've all drowned. Trapped in the cars. [00:44:28] Speaker A: But the funny thing is, they leave the scene. [00:44:31] Speaker B: They leave the scene because they have to report the accident. I guess there's no one, no monitoring station or anything on Advanced World of Krypton. [00:44:45] Speaker A: I don't know. I mean, what happens? Does another monitor come along and plunge in after that one just because no [00:44:49] Speaker B: one took the cause? No one reported it? All right, so Jimmy says, after we report the accident, Miri, I'm going to Kryptonopolis alone to see Jor El. You go home and rest. I'll see you tomorrow. [00:45:04] Speaker A: Whatever you say, she says. Several hours later, outside Jor El's lab [00:45:10] Speaker B: I must convince Jor El that I'm from the future and use my visit to persuade the Science Council to evacuate Krypton at once. Then, hey, who are all these walking robots? [00:45:21] Speaker A: Cease the intruder. [00:45:23] Speaker B: The robots spin a steel cocoon around Jimmy. [00:45:29] Speaker A: There must be a better way to capture a humanoid without wasting all that steel. [00:45:34] Speaker B: Yeah, probably. Like robots could just grab him. [00:45:36] Speaker A: Yeah, or put a net over him. [00:45:39] Speaker B: All right. They take wrapped up Jimmy de Jor El. Jimmy says, I want to help you save Krypton. He says, what do you know about Krypton's danger? I've warned the Science Council, but they won't listen to me. [00:45:56] Speaker A: He says, now listen to me. [00:45:57] Speaker B: That's why I came to see you. [00:45:59] Speaker A: Free me and I'll explain everything. [00:46:01] Speaker B: So Jimmy's released. He sketches a picture of the rocket that sent Kal El to Earth. Jor El says, you must have stolen it from my preliminary sketches. [00:46:12] Speaker A: No, these plans were drawn by your son, Kal El as an adult in the future from which I've come. He's called Superman. Look at this picture of him. Doesn't he resemble your boy? [00:46:22] Speaker B: So Jimmy shows Jor El a picture of adult Superman and Jor El recognizes him because in Superman number 141 Superman traveled back in time to Krypton and portrayed himself as a distant family relative or something. [00:46:42] Speaker A: Why didn't he try to change the future? [00:46:44] Speaker B: He did. He told he didn't work. [00:46:47] Speaker A: Oh, [00:46:49] Speaker B: here comes baby Kal El. Me hear noise. Me wake up. [00:46:52] Speaker A: I hate the way baby Kal El talks. [00:46:55] Speaker B: And look at precious little baby crypto. [00:46:57] Speaker A: Baby Krypto. [00:47:00] Speaker B: All right. Jimmy tries to explain that Kal El grows up under a yellow sun and has superpowers. And then he picks up the baby and Krypto's not having it, the baby's not having it. He starts crying. Here comes Laura in her bathrobe. She's about to lose a lung there, as my mother would say. She takes the baby, but she says, I'm sure Jimmy meant no harm. He looks like a good lad. [00:47:31] Speaker A: Bah. [00:47:32] Speaker B: You women are too impressed with appearances. He's a lunatic. [00:47:35] Speaker A: Jor El pushes Jimmy out the door and says, get out of here. [00:47:39] Speaker B: Jor El's an asshole. [00:47:40] Speaker A: He is. And he says. Jimmy says, you're making a mistake. [00:47:43] Speaker B: And he says, well, write to me [00:47:44] Speaker A: about it from the future. Meanwhile, I don't want you around now. [00:47:49] Speaker B: If Jor el won't listen to me, who will? Next morning at Dr. Zach Lore's house, Jimmy's making breakfast. [00:47:56] Speaker A: He's making hamburgers and French fries. [00:47:59] Speaker B: Yes. For breakfast. [00:48:00] Speaker A: Girl, I could go for a hamburger and French fry right now. [00:48:04] Speaker B: Oh, maybe we should order that for dinner. Order or go get it. [00:48:10] Speaker A: Rather make it from scratch. [00:48:12] Speaker B: Well, I didn't get those ingredients at the store. I'm sorry. I got a frozen pizza. [00:48:16] Speaker A: Oh, that's all right with me, too. [00:48:18] Speaker B: Okay, now, please don't be cross with me, Jimmy. Why would he be cross with her? [00:48:28] Speaker A: I have no idea. [00:48:30] Speaker B: Well, she's gonna show him her greenhouse where she's got a collection of experimental plants which she crossbreeds to develop hybrids. Oh, great. Jimmy says, looking at hybrid plants is just what I need. [00:48:44] Speaker A: What a weird sequence of dialogue. Those two panels, huh? [00:48:49] Speaker B: Suddenly he spots something familiar, a plant from Earth that he recognizes, and he grabs a block of wood and starts whittling at it. [00:48:57] Speaker A: It looks like he's using green wood. [00:49:00] Speaker B: Yeah, maybe they have exotic green wood and Krypton. [00:49:03] Speaker A: Well, he's doing it on a wooden table, which is brown wood. [00:49:08] Speaker B: That afternoon, he strolls into the Science Council assembly hall with a pipe that he has whittled, and smoking tobacco, which is what he recognized in the greenhouse and apparently had time to dry it and process it into shredded tobacco, which could be smoked. Minutes later, after a hushed silence, he takes to the chalkboard where he. Now, if someone walked into your meeting and just started scrawling gibberish on the chalkboard. [00:49:54] Speaker A: Right. [00:49:55] Speaker B: And told you it was their language from another planet and the future I'd [00:50:01] Speaker A: carefully escort them to. [00:50:02] Speaker B: Yes, thank you, please. [00:50:04] Speaker A: Right. So he first, he. As he's smoking in the room, he leads them through the Alphabet, right? A to Z. [00:50:13] Speaker B: Yes. [00:50:13] Speaker A: The minutes later, after a hushed silence. Incredible. I've never saw scenes of scrollings The Kryptonians say. And he goes, and you ain't seen nothing yet. Here are the numbers we use in our world. 1 through 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12. [00:50:29] Speaker B: But if you are from the future, how did you get here? [00:50:33] Speaker A: By means of this tiny time machine. Oh, sorry. This is Jimmy Olsen. By means of this tiny time machine, I'll put it on your wrist so that you can travel through time by its mechanism. I'll show you how to reach the past or the future. Then you'll believe me. [00:50:46] Speaker B: So off this old gent goes into the prehistoric past. Whoa. And he doesn't return because we find out in the past he's attacked by cavemen. [00:51:01] Speaker A: Don't you hate when you go into the past and you're attacked by cavemen or dinosaurs? [00:51:06] Speaker B: You know, I kind of have a thing for cavemen. I probably wouldn't mind that at all. [00:51:10] Speaker A: Yeah, that's why you don't like when I shave my back. [00:51:12] Speaker B: That's correct. Then in the science council three hours later, when the gentleman has failed to reappear, they assume Jimmy has sent him into the past and murdered him. They take him and they're going to put him into the Phantom Zone after a night in the Houzkau, where he'll be forever. However, they did allow him to send one message to Miri, who says that he does love me. He can't be a criminal and be in love with me. [00:51:46] Speaker A: Yes, he writes, parting is such sweet sorrow that I shall say good night till it be morrow. [00:51:52] Speaker B: Well, that's plagiarized from Shakespeare. Yes, now he wants Mirri to bring him a tiny capsule containing a chemical which he's apparently left the formula for how to create. Before dawn the following morning, Miri arrives and slips him the little vial of potion, which turns out to be his stretching potion. [00:52:17] Speaker A: I forgot about this. [00:52:18] Speaker B: To turn into Elastic Lad. He stretches, escapes through a keyhole. But just as Jimmy reaches freedom, the post hypnotic suggestion implanted by the Phantom's own villains takes effect. [00:52:32] Speaker A: You will steal the Phantom Zone Projector and release Professor Varox and me. [00:52:36] Speaker B: Yes, Jaxar, I will do your bidding. So he stretches in, steals the Phantom Zone projector, releases Varox and Jax. Ur, well, there it says Varox, but on the other page it says Vakox typo. Well, I think it is supposed to be Vakox. [00:52:57] Speaker A: No, no, Varox is on page 22. Professor Varox and me. [00:53:01] Speaker B: Yeah, but then on page 23, it's Vacox. [00:53:05] Speaker A: Oh, for heaven's sake. [00:53:06] Speaker B: I know. So they are released from the Phantom Zone. Jaxer orders Jimmy to snatch him up, snatch them both up with his elastic powers and run off, which he does. The days pass swiftly. The hunt continues. But they can't find any trace of Jimmy and the criminals. But they are in a cavern beneath nearby Lake Traum, where they are preparing to escape via space capsule before Krypton explodes, which is going to happen within the hour. Jimmy refuses to leave, not without one more try to save Miri. And Jimmy hurtles over to the Science Council chamber to find a pleasant surprise. The Chief is back from the prehistoric past. That's great. Yes, some cavemen captured me and held me prisoner for several days before I could escape. But I'll return your wristwatch now. But seconds later, the final doom strikes. Krypton is exploding. [00:54:12] Speaker A: Yes. [00:54:12] Speaker B: Quickly, Miri. Maybe I can take you to the future with me. No. [00:54:16] Speaker A: Escape while you can. As yourself. As you yourself wrote, parting is such sweet sorrow. [00:54:22] Speaker B: She and her father fall down into the air. Father are sucked into a pit in the ground. Jimmy has just enough time to get back to the past or to the future on Earth. As he's flying away, he sees Kal El's ship flying from Jor El's lab and the villain's capsule from beneath Lake Traum. Back in the present, the brokenhearted reporter confesses all to his super pal. I never want to see this time machine gadget again. I goofed the whole deal. I didn't save Krypton, but I changed the past by freeing those villains. Did you? [00:55:05] Speaker A: Let's go to my fortress and check soon. [00:55:09] Speaker B: At Superman's Arctic Sanctuary, the Man of Steel snaps on his Phantom Zone viewer. [00:55:14] Speaker A: See, their capsule struck a time warp implosion created by the explosion of Krypton and were hurled back into the Zone. So he was able to use his Phantom Zone viewer to go back in time to see the moment that everything, the history was rewritten. [00:55:31] Speaker B: Apparently so, yes. Jimmy says, then I didn't change a thing. The past can't be altered, and I'm through tryin'. [00:55:46] Speaker A: Looks like Jimmy learned an important lesson. Our young cub reporter learned a very important lesson, didn't he? [00:55:53] Speaker B: Yes. Dear editor, my name is Jack Osgood, and like Jimmy, I have the initials J. O. I have always had much admiration for Jimmy, and of course, feel proud when I see someone calling him J. O For short. I'm sure that a lot of other readers who are also Jos get just as big a thrill out of seeing their initials in his magazine. Do you think. Do you think it would be possible to form a JO Club? [00:56:34] Speaker A: I love that you can't get through this. [00:56:39] Speaker B: Form a J O Club. I'm sure it would be possible for all readers with those initials. You could list each of them who wrote in. It would be really interesting to find out how many JOS There are. Read your great magazine. I would appreciate any help or encouragement you could give to me and other readers who are as interested in a JO Club as I am. JO Club. Well, I'm sure there are lots of readers of the Adventures of Jimmy Olsen who are already well ensconced into JO [00:57:19] Speaker A: Class [00:57:22] Speaker B: in their hometowns. We think your idea is jolly. Okay, so if you're a JO write and tell us what you think of Jack's idea. We'll print the best J O Letters. There's already a magazine that prints those. Oh, I'm quite sure. When did Playboy start? [00:57:47] Speaker A: I don't know, but we should leave this. [00:57:49] Speaker B: Yes, we should. [00:57:50] Speaker A: Oh, gosh. [00:57:51] Speaker B: We'll print the best JO Letters. Imposters, please stay away. Find the editor. Well, that's all we have time for. Unless you wanted to start a JO Club. I don't. You can find us on social media, ogocheckpod. You can rate and review us wherever you get your podcasts from. You can find us on our sister podcast, Nerd Orchestra. And you can find us right back here next week with the most sensational new character find of 1967. [00:58:25] Speaker A: New character? [00:58:27] Speaker B: Yes. Oh, Aquagirl. [00:58:31] Speaker A: Oh, I would have reacted that way to any character. You had to. [00:58:37] Speaker B: I know. Okay, bye. Wondering why.