Those Who Fail to Learn From the Past (Teen Titans 8)

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Are you ready? Yeah. Are you with it? Yeah. Okay, let's go. You know what to do. The whole world's watching and counting on you. And all you people listening out there. Everybody everywhere. [00:00:13] Speaker B: Hang on, hang on, hang on. Welcome to Checkered Past, a loving postmodern examination of the. Go. Go. Check. Branded comic magazines published by DC Comics between February 1966 and August 1967. I'm Dr. Bob, and each week I'll be your guide on this TR Trippy Tour through 535 mid century masterpieces of graphic noveldom. This Week, Teen Titans 8. Cover date March, April 1967. Cover price, $0.12. Cover artist Nick Carty. Edited by George Cashdan Featuring a killer called Honey Bun Written by Bob Haney. Art by Irv Novick and Jack Abel. Are you ready? Are you with it? Then away we go. Go. [00:01:01] Speaker C: If you're walking in the shadows then it's time that you get wise. Just forget about your troubles and open up your eyes. When you wear a smile the world will shout hooray. You gotta turn on the sunshine. You're gonna push the bl. [00:01:29] Speaker B: Teen Titans investigate. When trouble develops between a vigilante group and foreign exchange students in the town of Landsford, the conflict is escalated when it appears that one of the students, Hans Wernick, has stolen Honey Bun, an experimental jungle fighter machine being developed by the nearby Lansford Research Corporation. Confused? Don't worry, I'll be right back with Dr. Husband to explain everything. [00:01:55] Speaker C: 101 pounds of fun, that's my little Honey bun. Load a honey bun tonight. I'm speaking of my sweetie pie. Only 60 inches high, every inch is packed with dynamite. Her hair is blonde and curly. Her curls are hurly burly. [00:02:22] Speaker A: Her lips are pips. [00:02:23] Speaker C: I call her hips twirly and whirly. [00:02:27] Speaker B: Well, hi. How you been doing? [00:02:29] Speaker A: Oh, I'm fine, thank you. [00:02:30] Speaker B: Yeah? [00:02:31] Speaker A: Yeah. How about you? [00:02:31] Speaker B: Oh, well, I'm frustrated. [00:02:33] Speaker A: What's wrong? [00:02:35] Speaker B: Well, DC Comics. Not them. They themselves. Maybe it was them. Anyway, they released a two pack action figure set some years ago of the Silver Age. Batwoman and Batgirl. And it came with Bat Mite and Ace the Bat Hound. [00:02:55] Speaker A: Wow. [00:02:56] Speaker B: And Ace is a nice figure. It's partially articulated. You can turn his head around. I think you can move his legs. And it's a substantial dog. He's a German shepherd, you know. Nice size. Then they released a Silver Age Superboy and Supergirl set. [00:03:12] Speaker A: Oh. [00:03:13] Speaker B: With Krypto and Streaky. [00:03:16] Speaker A: Wow. Which you have. [00:03:18] Speaker B: Right, which I have. Of course. Krypto and Streaky are the same size. [00:03:22] Speaker A: And they don't articulate. [00:03:24] Speaker B: They do not articulate. [00:03:25] Speaker A: I know that because I actually picked them up one day off the shelf. I was like, oh, that's interesting. They're just like little figures, like Monopoly playset. [00:03:35] Speaker B: Like the little bin of loose animals you get at the toy store. [00:03:38] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:03:40] Speaker B: And then they did a set with the Superman robot and Beppo the super monkey and he's a nice sized chimp, you know, of a. Like with Ace the Bad Hound, all I want is a crypto figure and Comet the super horse, but that's another story. Probably have to make that myself. [00:03:57] Speaker A: But why Picture of that. [00:03:59] Speaker B: What? All you need is a base horse and then you make a little harness and cape for it. [00:04:03] Speaker A: Oh, okay. [00:04:03] Speaker B: Easy squeezy. [00:04:04] Speaker A: Right. [00:04:05] Speaker B: But I'm calling all the toy experts. Why isn't there a crypto that's the same size as Ace the Bad Hound? And if. And where can I get one? How can I have one specially made? Yeah. [00:04:19] Speaker A: Wow. [00:04:19] Speaker B: That's the kind of things I have to think about on three day weekends. [00:04:23] Speaker A: Where did the time go? [00:04:25] Speaker B: Well, what are you talking about? I had plenty of time. [00:04:31] Speaker A: This weekend. [00:04:32] Speaker B: Yeah, it's Labor Day weekend, in case you're time stamping for your records. [00:04:37] Speaker A: Yeah, well, I had this sort of. Sort of Damocles hanging over my head all weekend and that was that. I needed to get my lecture notes finished for class for this week because I'm teaching a class for the first time and that first week of classes was crazy busy. [00:04:52] Speaker B: And how long have you known about the first week of classes? [00:04:55] Speaker A: A long time. I was just delaying because I'm using an electronic textbook for this class and I really had a hard time absorbing. I actually do have a hard time absorbing just completely digital information if I need to commit it to memory and make some sense of it. [00:05:13] Speaker B: Show what? [00:05:13] Speaker A: I prefer to print it out so I can handle it. And, and so anyway. Are you stopping the recording? [00:05:19] Speaker B: No. [00:05:19] Speaker A: Oh, I thought you were like, oh, yeah, this is boring. Anyway, so I've known about it for a long time, so I'm fine now. [00:05:25] Speaker B: But it. [00:05:25] Speaker A: But. And I'm actually a little bit ahead now. But yeah, I just sort of had that hanging over my head and it sort of. Unfortunately, it kind of colors my perception of what I can do with my free time. [00:05:39] Speaker B: Sure. [00:05:39] Speaker A: Yeah, so there's that. I had a lovely weekend with friends and got to see our dear friend Jude too yesterday before she moves away. [00:05:49] Speaker B: Yes. [00:05:51] Speaker A: One of my oldest friends that I did shows with in upstate New York for a summer. Summer stock. We've remained in close contact since then and we both have served as cruise directors on different ships and we've both moved around a lot. And I was very lucky to have her here for the last, what, year and a half or so in this region. And unfortunately she's moving back to Chicago and I, I love my dear friend. So I was glad that we got to spend some time with her one last time yesterday. [00:06:22] Speaker B: Well, I don't think it'll be the last time. Chicago. [00:06:25] Speaker A: Well, I'm sorry. Yes. I mean, you know, like, like, like having somebody so close. It was just really good to say, hey, you know, when you come over for dinner, you know, and that was easy. And let's see what else, um, we did today. We went for a bicycle ride. Of course I read a comic which induced a nap, which is now. [00:06:44] Speaker B: Is that because you're reading the comic on an idevice and not holding it in your greasy little paw? Think that's why it puts you to sleep? [00:06:53] Speaker A: Perhaps. I've always been this way. Whenever I'm reading something that requires me to really retain. Requires a level of concentration that it exceeds what I normally have to do when I'm looking at something on paper. [00:07:06] Speaker B: So when we go through it here in a few minutes, it'll be like reading it for the first time. [00:07:11] Speaker A: No, no, because I came into this with ideas. Oh, yes. I actually thought about it a little bit in advance, so. Which you'll find out as I get into it. [00:07:21] Speaker B: Done. [00:07:21] Speaker A: And I'm looking forward to actually, when we're done with this, actually finally getting my instruments back out again after two weeks hiatus and practicing again. Because now I have a little bit of window schedule which I haven't had for a couple of weeks. [00:07:37] Speaker B: Well, once we finish, I shall importune you no further. You have the rest of the evening to yourself until dinner is ready. [00:07:45] Speaker A: Thank you. Thank you. I don't believe I'm going to need that much time, but anyway, I appreciate it and it was great. We didn't have to do the lawn this weekend because it's dry and grass. [00:07:56] Speaker B: Is crunchy when you walk on it. That doesn't seem great, but that's global warming. [00:08:02] Speaker A: So what do we have this week? We also met with a roofing contractor. Yeah, spec that what we're going to have done. We have to have the roof replaced. [00:08:10] Speaker B: Sure. [00:08:11] Speaker A: And that'll be done soon. And then, oh, on Friday we'll have somebody come and look at the crawl space. [00:08:17] Speaker B: It's full of mold. [00:08:19] Speaker A: So they say. I don't have the nerve to go down there. I will go down there sometime this week with a mask on just to see how bad it is. Okay. But we're going to bring somebody in to assess it and we'll pay someone to treat it and also install a prevention measure, be it a ventilation system or something. There are vents on the side, but sometimes that's not enough. [00:08:41] Speaker B: This all started listener when we had a gentleman come to inspect for termites. And there is no termite damage. But the young gentleman came back to the door with a look in his eyes akin to a soon to be victim in an E.C. horror comic. And he said, you've got mold down there. You've got a lot of mold. Yeah, maybe it's a plant elemental growing. That would be exciting. [00:09:13] Speaker A: I don't care what it is, it'll be killed. But anyway, I mean we haven't had mold forever. I mean like I've been down there lots. I've never seen it. So it must be a recent development. Sure. And it can happen. It's actually very common in crawl spaces. So. And so. And we'll deal with that soon. So I'm not really worried about that. We don't smell it in the house. We didn't even know we had it. But there you go. And apparently it seems to be isolated to the crawl space. [00:09:39] Speaker B: Yes. [00:09:40] Speaker A: Yeah. And what else? Let's see. Got it. We have auditions this week at school for a musical that I'm directing. [00:09:45] Speaker B: Well, I'm not involved in that, but good luck. [00:09:48] Speaker A: Yeah, but that's going to take up three of my evenings which, which you know, I love my evenings. But I have something new in my schedule which is like mornings. Like I have mornings. [00:10:01] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:10:01] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:10:02] Speaker B: Welcome to full time teaching. [00:10:03] Speaker A: I know. And so I was really good about that last week. I would go into work around 8 to 8:30 in the morning and work in the mornings, which is something I will continue to do. And that actually will. Will lead to me having my evenings free. [00:10:19] Speaker B: Atta boy. [00:10:20] Speaker A: So I just. That first week of school is really pretty. Pretty full. [00:10:26] Speaker B: Sure. [00:10:27] Speaker A: So anyway, yeah, it was good. We spent time with friends this weekend and it was nice. Really nice. Right? [00:10:34] Speaker B: Yes. [00:10:34] Speaker A: So speaking of friends, let's get into the Super Teen friends and talk about the Teen Titans. [00:10:42] Speaker B: Teen Titans number eight cover date March, April 1967 featuring some good old fashioned American xenophobia. It's Titan time again. But then isn't it always time for creeps, crumbs and cruds to make it open season on the grooving jet setters of the comics world. What threatens the cool quartet this time is old as trouble itself. The dark forces in the heart of men, specifically in the heart of white men, which now unleash a menace that marks a staggering entry in the Titan Files, known as a killer called Honey Bun. [00:11:28] Speaker A: I kept on reading this comic thinking, well, when's the evil honey bun coming? When's the evil honey bun coming? Because, I mean, it was. I swear to you, as soon as we started. As soon as we turned the page and started reading this, I was like, whoa, it's been right. [00:11:43] Speaker B: I was like, they start off with a bang. [00:11:45] Speaker A: Oh, let's see, this is 1966 or 67. [00:11:49] Speaker B: 67. [00:11:49] Speaker A: 67. So that's 40 years. And then the 13 years, it's a 53. And then. So 58 years. 58 years ago. Yeah, 58 years ago this was written. And it could have been written today. [00:12:04] Speaker B: Today, yeah. What goes around comes around. [00:12:08] Speaker A: Not the first page. Oh, my God, do we have to keep hearing about the Beatles? I guess the Beatles were huge. [00:12:15] Speaker B: Well, that's what I was just actually doing some research to try to figure out because they. In August of 1966, they finished up their last tour and then they went studio album only. [00:12:33] Speaker A: What did they release in 66 and 67? White. [00:12:36] Speaker B: White album. Right around this time. No, Sergeant Pepper was right around this time. [00:12:39] Speaker A: Okay. [00:12:42] Speaker B: And I mean, I guess sergeant Pepper was hailed as sort of definitive influence on the youths. But this is way after Beatlemania. This is way after Ed Sullivan, way after the movies. [00:12:57] Speaker A: Right. [00:12:59] Speaker B: And after their final tour. So I don't know what all the hubbub was. [00:13:04] Speaker A: I don't know either. [00:13:06] Speaker B: I guess it was just the release of sergeant Peppers. But it's the, what, third or fourth mention of the Beatles in comics published this month? [00:13:15] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, we saw it mentioned in Jerry Lewis. [00:13:19] Speaker B: Yes. [00:13:19] Speaker A: And this. I don't remember. There was something before that as well. [00:13:22] Speaker B: Something before that. [00:13:23] Speaker A: Yes, and just the, you know, this groove talk. Well, not groove talk. What do we call this? [00:13:29] Speaker B: Adult white men trying to imitate teenager language. [00:13:32] Speaker A: Yeah, but what are they? They're trying to use kid slang, I guess. [00:13:35] Speaker B: Hep language. [00:13:36] Speaker A: Hep language. H I, P. Hip language. [00:13:40] Speaker B: Well, I'm sure the people writing Bob Haney's spelling at hep A, G, P. I mean, it's. It's Bob Haney. [00:13:46] Speaker A: It's awful. [00:13:46] Speaker B: Well, it's Bob Haney. [00:13:47] Speaker A: It's embarrassingly awful. Right? I mean, it's like your grandparents Trying to say, don't be. What was an 80s term that we used to use? [00:13:58] Speaker B: Radical. [00:13:59] Speaker A: Radical. Or gag me with a spoon. [00:14:02] Speaker B: You know, I mean, you know I'm a big fan of the Frankie and Annette beach movies. Yes, that's the same. Possibly the same writer. I'm sure Bob Hadey had a hand in those somewhere along the line. [00:14:13] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:14:14] Speaker B: So it doesn't. I'm not embarrassed by it. I'm just like, oh, this was not written by a teenager. [00:14:20] Speaker A: Ah, no, but I'm not. Well, I mean, embarrassed is a little. I'm annoyed. I'm annoyed. [00:14:28] Speaker B: Inside the Teen Titans lair, the fab foursome are up to their old tricks. Opening mail because that how they are alerted to danger by the US Postal Service. [00:14:38] Speaker A: Yeah, right. And they're especially emergencies. We've seen this before. [00:14:43] Speaker B: Yes. [00:14:43] Speaker A: Yeah. Where they receive a notification through the US Postal Service that there's an emergency. [00:14:51] Speaker B: Yes. Robin's reading the mail. Dig this letter characters. Dear Titans, next to the Beatles, you are my favorite four people. At which point Kid Flash picks up a guitire. [00:15:07] Speaker A: Is that Wally West? [00:15:08] Speaker B: Yes. And starts singing a lays a happy song on our hearts. All I want to do is hold your foot. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And Wonder Girl's not a fan. [00:15:21] Speaker A: Wonder Girl. Wonder will last. Wonder what is she girl Listening to you, twinkle toes. All I want to do is hold my ears. Ha ha ha. [00:15:32] Speaker B: All right, here's another letter. Dear Titans, I'd like to be an exchange student and in a foreign land in my senior year. Any advice? This troubled me. P.S. i am blonde, blue eyed and five foot four. Signed, Amy. Well, Amy, you're safe to come to America as long as you're blonde and blue eyed. [00:15:56] Speaker A: Oh, so Aqualad says. Sure, if she's as cute as she sounds, tell her to learn how to breathe underwater and enroll at Atlantis High next year. I'll be her steady. [00:16:05] Speaker B: Well, I know you had an interesting question about Aqualad earlier, which you asked of our resident aqua expert, Chuck. [00:16:12] Speaker A: I did ask Chuck, and he was. [00:16:15] Speaker B: Not putting up with your nonsense. [00:16:17] Speaker A: I said Chuck, does Aqualad go to a special room to pee or does he just let it go in the house as it floats out of a window? And when he poops, does it string along after him until it breaks off like it does in fish? Do young Aqualads and Aqualasses wear diapers? Or are they more like feral children? Fish children when it comes to their body waste. P.S. asking for a friend. [00:16:39] Speaker B: Well, first of all, there's only one Aqualad. There's Not a school of Aqualads in Aqualasses. And in fact, it wouldn't be called Aqualad. It'd be Aqua Girl, whom we'll meet in next month's issue of Aquaman, number 33. [00:16:52] Speaker A: Well, anyway, I knew better than to ask you, because clearly you would just roll your eyes. [00:16:58] Speaker B: Aqualad's costume is equipped with some kind of filtration system for pee so that he can stay hydrated most of the time. [00:17:07] Speaker A: All right. [00:17:08] Speaker B: Poop I couldn't tell you about. But you do know my theory that that's why superheroes wear their underwear on the outside. Because they've got long John flaps in the back of their leotards and they just have to pull down their underwear and use the services as they need to. [00:17:23] Speaker A: Well, unfortunately, Chuck did not take my bait. [00:17:26] Speaker B: No. [00:17:28] Speaker A: Notice a pun there? [00:17:29] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:17:29] Speaker A: Yes. He says he was spending his holiday afternoon reading his comics and enjoying himself, so he was not to be bothered. So I said, let's. [00:17:37] Speaker B: Fine, be specific. He does that every afternoon. It's not just the holiday. [00:17:41] Speaker A: Well, yes, exactly. I thought he would enjoy it, but. [00:17:44] Speaker B: Hi, Chuck. [00:17:45] Speaker A: I just said, fine, I'll ask another expert, Microsoft copilot. So I asked Microsoft copilot the same question. [00:17:52] Speaker B: Sure. [00:17:53] Speaker A: And it said, you're really plumbing the depths of superhero. It said, let's break it down. Aqualad. Whether we're talking about Garth the original or Kaldur Alm Jackson Hyde from Young justice is Atlantean. Meaning he was raised in an underwater society with its own customs, technology, and, yes, presumably, plumbing. While DC Comics hasn't gifted us with a canonical potty training montage, it's safe to assume that Atlantean children are taught some form of bathroom etiquette. After all, Atlantis is a highly advanced civilization, not just a giant fish tank. I love that response. Now, biologically speaking, Atlanteans are humanoid and have similar bodies battle bodily functions. But underwater, the logistics get fluid. [00:18:43] Speaker B: Stop. [00:18:43] Speaker A: I know. AI's got a little cute little sense of humor here, Right. It's entirely possible that in the ocean they follow the when in Rome philosophy. Like other marine life, they might just go in the. Go with the flow. But in Atlantis, with its palaces and tech, they likely use facilities designed for underwater use. Think pressure sealed toilets or some kind of water filtration magic. So, yes, Aqualad was almost certainly potty trained. But when he's out in the open ocean, let's just say he's got options. Want to explore other weird superhero questions? I'm all in. Thanks. Microsoft copilot I'm done. I just. When I was reading this, I don't know why I got it in my mind because Aqualad talked about, you know, you know, he's going to go back to high school. And I was like, oh, that's right. He lives under underwater and he lives on land. And where does he go to the bathroom? [00:19:39] Speaker B: Well, I mean, Atlantis has beds with sheets, so they certainly have some kind of bathroom facility. [00:19:47] Speaker A: They must keep use the sheets to keep floating away. [00:19:51] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:19:51] Speaker A: Or to keep warm. [00:19:54] Speaker B: Well, I don't know how warm, wet sheets are going to keep them. But you do. You, Aqualad. Hey, speaking of exchange students, gang, dig this letter. [00:20:06] Speaker A: And then Robin just reads it without reading out loud. He reads it silently and then runs. [00:20:12] Speaker B: And then runs off to the Teen Titans copter, which they bought with reward money earned from bringing crooks to justice. [00:20:21] Speaker A: He runs off to the Teen Titans copter because he says, we're going to the town of Landsford. They've got some foreign exchange students there and they're in trouble. Let's go. He's got to run because the letter that he just read asking for their help was written four days ago. [00:20:36] Speaker B: Yes. At least. [00:20:37] Speaker A: Mm. [00:20:40] Speaker B: Not long after, in Lansford, a typical bustling small American city. [00:20:45] Speaker A: So we see there's a riot going on. Not a riot, a protest going on. And this protest has probably been going on for days because the letter was written. [00:20:55] Speaker B: And where, like, is the protest happening at the airport? I mean, maybe it is. Maybe the foreign exchange students have just arrived by air. [00:21:08] Speaker A: No, because there is something that they're upset about. And the foreign students have been there for a while. [00:21:15] Speaker B: So the helicopter just land, like, right on the field hockey pitch at the high school? [00:21:21] Speaker A: Who knows? It doesn't really say. I was trying to read the writing on the building there. [00:21:28] Speaker B: Yeah, it looks like Lansford Bloom. [00:21:30] Speaker A: You can see that. [00:21:31] Speaker B: Well, I can make out the word Lansford because I know that's where we are. The typical bustling, small American city of Lansford. [00:21:39] Speaker A: Okay. [00:21:41] Speaker B: Dr. Paxton. Dr. Paxton introduces himself. He's the one that wrote the letter. It seems the vigilantes, a group of patriotic townspeople, are against our exchange program and protesting it, as is their right. The students who support the program are protesting the protest. [00:22:02] Speaker A: We call that a counter protest. [00:22:04] Speaker B: Yes. Dr. Paxton introduces our own exchange students, who are remarkably not overly done. [00:22:19] Speaker A: What you're being. You're saying that tongue in cheek. [00:22:22] Speaker B: I'm not really. It could have been so much worse. [00:22:25] Speaker A: You're right. It could have been so much worse. [00:22:28] Speaker B: They're not stereotypically depicted, except that Ahmed. Ahmed Al Din from Africa. So North Africa. Fine. They could have said Saudi Arabia. Yeah, that's interesting that they made him from Africa. [00:22:40] Speaker A: Sama Rao of India. [00:22:42] Speaker B: Yes, she does have the. I don't know what the dots are called. [00:22:46] Speaker A: Yes, she has the beautification dot or. [00:22:49] Speaker B: Whatever on her forehead. You know what I'm talking about, everyone. The term you're looking for is bindi, a decorative mark or dot worn on the forehead by people, particularly Hindu women in the Indian subcontinent. In Hinduism, the bindi is associated with the Ajna chakra, or the third eye, which represents spiritual insight and inner wisdom. [00:23:09] Speaker A: Yes. [00:23:09] Speaker B: And Hans Vuhrnick from Europe. Well, we know where he's from. [00:23:13] Speaker A: And forgive me if I referred to it incorrectly as a beautification dot. I'm the only thing I know about it. [00:23:17] Speaker B: It does have a religious significance. [00:23:19] Speaker A: It does have a religious significance. But I always. I love to see that woman on. On Instagram that has a cat. She's an Indian mother, and she dresses up her cat in, like, she puts. She puts her in a sari, and she puts, like, little jewelry on her, and then it puts a little thing on her forehead and talks to her and talks about how beautiful she is. That's all I know about it. Yeah. Do you know? You've seen it. You've seen it, right? I love it. It's so adorable. Okay, so anyway, they are talking to these. Well, of course you talk about this. This. You know them. Luckily, they haven't made them too stereotypical. Except that the Indian girl uses the term the on the next page. Instead of saying you, she says the. I've never heard used by anyone. And we've spoken to lots of Indian people, and so I've never heard someone use, like thee and thou and stuff like that. Old English. [00:24:14] Speaker B: Well, maybe she was educated at Eton or another fine British school, because we're not so far away from the British colonial. [00:24:23] Speaker A: Colonial. [00:24:25] Speaker B: All right. Robin apologizes for all the trouble, and Hans says, don't apologize. [00:24:30] Speaker A: I'm sorry. [00:24:31] Speaker B: Don't apologize, Robin, America is a democracy. Well, technically, it's a constitutional republic. Not everyone agrees with everyone else. This we understand. [00:24:43] Speaker A: Suddenly, as a car screeches to a halt, Chief Honey Bun, she's been kidnapped. Stolen from the plant. [00:24:49] Speaker B: What? Great Scott. That's terrible. [00:24:52] Speaker A: Hey, wait. [00:24:53] Speaker B: That kid. [00:24:53] Speaker A: He's one of us all snooping around Honey Bun's compound one night. [00:24:56] Speaker B: He's pointing to Hans. Get him. [00:25:00] Speaker A: Get the foreigner. They literally say, get the foreigner. [00:25:03] Speaker B: Yeah, well, we forgot to we neglected to read the protest signs. America for Americans. Classic. Exchange X C H A N G E Program stinks. [00:25:18] Speaker A: Foreign students go home. [00:25:19] Speaker B: Foreign students. S T O O D E N T S so it does not say that. It does on page three. Foreign students. [00:25:28] Speaker A: Oh, I was looking at the next page. [00:25:30] Speaker B: Well, you know these types. They always misspell. [00:25:34] Speaker A: Well, then there's the counter protesters that have a sign that say exchange students. Yay. Yeah, yeah. Not yay, Yay. Yeah, yeah. [00:25:41] Speaker B: Vigilantes, Stay home. Foreign students. [00:25:43] Speaker A: Cool cats. [00:25:46] Speaker B: Scram, vigilantes. [00:25:47] Speaker A: Of course, the vigilantes are brown sharks. [00:25:49] Speaker B: The vigilantes. Now, now, talk about stereotypical depictions. The vigilantes have uniforms. [00:25:57] Speaker A: Brown uniforms. [00:25:58] Speaker B: Brown uniforms. Black armbands with a V on them. [00:26:01] Speaker A: Yep. [00:26:02] Speaker B: And they all have crew cuts. [00:26:04] Speaker A: They all have crew cuts. And they also have, like a leather thing going on. [00:26:08] Speaker B: Leather strap across their chest. Yes. [00:26:10] Speaker A: Yeah. So they look like Nazis. [00:26:12] Speaker B: Yes. Yeah. They are about to start fighting. They want to get Hans and lynch him, I'm assuming. [00:26:21] Speaker A: The crowd breaks into a riot. [00:26:23] Speaker B: The counter protesters surround the exchange students to protect them. The police are ineffective. [00:26:31] Speaker A: So luckily the Teen Titans are there to use their wonderful skills to beat up the Brownshirts. [00:26:37] Speaker B: Robin gets right in there punching and karate chopping. [00:26:43] Speaker A: Wonder Girl just flips all over them, using her powerful abilities. And to flip and knocking people out, really, she's using her. She's kicking and hitting, but mostly she's kicking guys in the throat, which is fine with me. [00:26:55] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:26:56] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:26:57] Speaker B: And no grass ever grows beneath another pair of famous feet. [00:27:01] Speaker A: Wally West. [00:27:02] Speaker B: Wally west separates the crowd. Aqualad does nothing. [00:27:06] Speaker A: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I just remembered something. [00:27:10] Speaker B: Aqualad pisses all over the crowd. [00:27:12] Speaker A: He pisses all over the crowd. I just remember something. What did you hear me do the other night in this room? Scream an expletive? Did you hear? You heard me scream an expletive, right? [00:27:23] Speaker B: I did. [00:27:23] Speaker A: Yes. Yes. What did we come home from being with friends on Saturday and Robin, your action figure of Robin. [00:27:33] Speaker B: Yes. Was a superpower scale. [00:27:34] Speaker A: Figure was on the floor face down. [00:27:37] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:27:38] Speaker A: So I didn't want Robin to stay there just in case one of the dogs got in, so I picked. Which dogs have never picked anything up off the shelf. [00:27:44] Speaker B: They have not. [00:27:46] Speaker A: So I picked it up off the floor and I noticed that Dr. Midnight was also, like, on the shelf had fallen over. So I reached my hand in with Rob. [00:27:56] Speaker B: I don't have a superpower as Dr. Midnight, so try again, chum. Dr. Fate. [00:28:03] Speaker A: Dr. Fate. Okay, sorry. Dr. Fate. [00:28:06] Speaker B: Yes. Okay, Go On. [00:28:08] Speaker A: There's a point to this. [00:28:09] Speaker B: Yes, go on. [00:28:10] Speaker A: You were surprised at what I knew I was right. But you corrected me at the time. I said Dr. Midnight. You said Dr. Fado. I know. I think I said Dr. Fade, but I did refer to him wearing a mask and not a helmet. Corrected me on the helmet. So I screamed really loud. Not like some exorcist. [00:28:29] Speaker B: I believe you took the name of the Lord in vain. [00:28:31] Speaker A: Yes, because I had reached in to pick up Dr. Fate, set him up, and put Robin back down and knocked down several columns of action figures. And you said, what's wrong? What's going on? I said. And I said, I just knocked. I just tried to pick up Robin off the floor. And Dr. Fate fell over. He was, who's the guy with the helmet? And he said, he's got blue and yellow. And he goes, it's not a helmet. It's a mask. I said, no, it's not a mask. It's a helmet. And I go, God. And Jon Stewart went flying right off the shelf. [00:29:07] Speaker B: You did know Jon Stewart. [00:29:09] Speaker A: Exactly. You know a Green Lantern, right? I was like, God, Jon, I get to reach back there and get Jon Stewart out of the back. And you said, just walk away. [00:29:17] Speaker B: Just leave it. [00:29:17] Speaker A: Just leave it. Leave it. [00:29:19] Speaker B: It's a sign that I need more shelf space because they're all crowded in there and. [00:29:23] Speaker A: Well, I don't disagree with you. However, if we ever had the money, I would very much like for you to have a cabinet at least that big, but made of. With wooden frame and glass. [00:29:43] Speaker B: So noted. [00:29:44] Speaker A: With lights. I would very much like to see it lit. Not just from the top, like. Like, lit like each shelf at the very front, just very small strip of lights so that it shines down on each different. I think that's what I would like to see. What I don't like about your shelf is for its practicality, for everything it gives you for practicality. You can't actually really enjoy what's in there because the walls of each cubicle are so thick and it's dark, and I just don't like that you can't see everything that's inside. [00:30:23] Speaker B: Well, I'm on board with your plan. [00:30:27] Speaker A: So, you know, this won't be happening anytime in the immediate future, but perhaps it will sometime. [00:30:33] Speaker B: I'm putting it on my vision board. [00:30:34] Speaker A: Okay. [00:30:35] Speaker B: You'll be surprised. [00:30:36] Speaker A: All right, let's get back to the story. [00:30:37] Speaker B: All right. As Kid Flash finishes his whirlwind rush through the crowd, the vigilantes and the students have been Separated into two lines. And say, what happened to the exchange students? Well, they've been whisked off by the Teen Titans. [00:30:55] Speaker A: Yes. [00:30:55] Speaker B: To safety. [00:30:58] Speaker A: Thank the gods. [00:30:59] Speaker B: Robin again apologizes for all of America. And Ahmed says it's okay. Robin. With you Titans here, perhaps we'll now be able to convince those people that we're all just like them, no matter where we were born. [00:31:15] Speaker A: Good luck with that, Ahmed. [00:31:17] Speaker B: Right as reign. Ahmed. Now, I think it might be a good idea if you all went home separately. See you later. [00:31:25] Speaker A: And that's where Ahmed says, salam, which means peace. [00:31:28] Speaker B: Yes. [00:31:29] Speaker A: And what's her name? She doesn't talk. Again, for the rest of the sama says, until we see thee. Now, maybe. Maybe that is a Hindi. Maybe that's a literal translation of a Hindi phrase. And then Hans, of course, is goodbye for now. Titans. He doesn't say. [00:31:55] Speaker B: Have we talked about Chitra and Mikola? [00:32:00] Speaker A: Who? [00:32:00] Speaker B: Chitra and Mikala. [00:32:02] Speaker A: I don't think so. [00:32:03] Speaker B: Well, when I was very young, my parents had friends at church. Paul and Vicenta. They were both in medical residency at Ohio State University. And for some reason, like, they finished their residency or they had to vacate their apartment, like, two weeks before their residencies were done. So they didn't have any place to live. Well, of course. My parents just said, come on, we. [00:32:32] Speaker A: Got an extra bed in your house. [00:32:34] Speaker B: In our house. [00:32:35] Speaker A: Wait, were you still a kid? [00:32:36] Speaker B: I was, like, 4 years old. [00:32:38] Speaker A: That meant your sister was still living at home. And was David still there? [00:32:43] Speaker B: David was probably the Navy. Andy might have been. [00:32:45] Speaker A: Andy might have been there? Yeah. Okay. [00:32:47] Speaker B: No, he wasn't there. I think it was just me. [00:32:49] Speaker A: Still, you all had one bathroom. [00:32:51] Speaker B: One bathroom. [00:32:52] Speaker A: And you had an extra bedroom, right? That would have been David's room. [00:32:56] Speaker B: Well, no, we didn't have. No, there was a boy's room and a girl's room, but. But my room had bunk beds, so I think all the. So I think Chitra. So they had two daughters, Chitra and Mikola. And I think they slept in the bunk beds, maybe with me in there. I don't remember. [00:33:14] Speaker A: Okay. [00:33:14] Speaker B: All I remember is Chitra gave me chickenpox or vice versa. I don't remember who started it, but. [00:33:20] Speaker A: I'm just surprised that a family of four moved into your house. [00:33:23] Speaker B: Why? [00:33:24] Speaker A: Well, they could have lived with Mrs. White. I doubt Mrs. White would have allowed the Indian family to. They're medical students, for God's sake. They were resident students, but they were doctors. [00:33:36] Speaker B: Skin is brown, so. [00:33:37] Speaker A: Oh, Mrs. White, I don't think she. [00:33:39] Speaker B: Would have put up with that. [00:33:40] Speaker A: No. Well, nobody thought. It doesn't surprise me that your mother would welcome them in. Your mother was very, very welcome. [00:33:46] Speaker B: Yes, and I'm sure they had more fun at our house than they would. [00:33:49] Speaker A: Have had at Mrs. W. I'm sure. [00:33:52] Speaker B: Well. And they did. They cooked and all. [00:33:54] Speaker A: Yeah, I seem to remember your mother saying that it took her forever to get the smell of curry out of the house. Yeah, Sounds like something she might have said. Yes, she would have said. Yeah, of course. I'm sure it was delightful. [00:34:06] Speaker B: Well, I'm sure it was too. [00:34:07] Speaker A: And your mother actually recalled that story? With fondness. [00:34:10] Speaker B: Oh, she wrote to them for years and years. [00:34:12] Speaker A: Yes. Yes. [00:34:15] Speaker B: All right. Robin orders Kid Flash to Bird Dog Hans. [00:34:24] Speaker A: Bird dog? [00:34:24] Speaker B: I guess they already have some suspicions about him. Well, did he say bird dog? [00:34:30] Speaker A: And because I'm suspicious. [00:34:31] Speaker B: No, he didn't. But that's. [00:34:34] Speaker A: I don't. [00:34:35] Speaker B: Yeah, I don't know why. [00:34:37] Speaker A: Oh, no, he does say. I see. And you're worried that suspicion is directed against Hans. Oh, no. He's talking to Dr. Pac. Paxton. [00:34:44] Speaker B: Yes, this is Dr. Paxton. [00:34:45] Speaker A: Paxton. [00:34:46] Speaker B: I guess he's the school counselor or something. Now, the kidnapping of Honey Bun has the whole town up in an uproar. [00:34:55] Speaker A: Now why are they worried about this? Because Honey Bun is actually a military. [00:35:01] Speaker B: Yes. [00:35:01] Speaker A: Weapon. [00:35:01] Speaker B: Honey Bunny Buen is the automated jungle fighter machine developed by Lansford's one big factory, the Lansford Research Research Corporation. [00:35:12] Speaker A: Many, many people in the town actually work for this research corporation. [00:35:16] Speaker B: The pride and prosperity of Lansford depends on Honey Bun being a success. And they are worried that suspicion is directed against Hunter, which will play right into the hands of the vigilantes. All our exchange students would be discredited. But Robin says, what about Hans? He is from a country that's had some disagreements with Uncle Sam. And he was reported seen around the factory. [00:35:44] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:35:45] Speaker B: Dr. Paxton says Hans is living in my own home. He's one of the finest young men I've ever known. [00:35:51] Speaker A: Just then, their conversation is interrupted by the fuzz. [00:35:55] Speaker B: The pigs. The man. [00:35:56] Speaker A: The hogs. The man. [00:35:57] Speaker B: They've got a warrant for Hans arrest. [00:35:59] Speaker A: Wait, the hogs. That's not right. That's not right. Hogs are what you ride on. [00:36:02] Speaker B: Pigs. [00:36:03] Speaker A: Pigs. Yeah. [00:36:06] Speaker B: The mayor and the town council are demanding Hans arrest after Honey Bun was stolen. But Dr. Paston doesn't know where he is. [00:36:14] Speaker A: No. [00:36:15] Speaker B: Well, don't worry. The Titans can find him. [00:36:19] Speaker A: So he tells Kid Flash, take off and find him. [00:36:23] Speaker B: Yes, just Kid Flash radios in. [00:36:26] Speaker A: Oh, I'm sorry. Kid Flash has done this. [00:36:27] Speaker B: Yes. [00:36:28] Speaker A: Kid Flash now radios in. [00:36:30] Speaker B: I've followed Hans to an old secret barn in the country. And hold on to your secret identity, super cats. He's the guy who kidnapped Honey Bun. All right, because here it comes. [00:36:41] Speaker A: Oh boy. [00:36:42] Speaker B: Helpfully labeled with its name right across the cabin. It's not manned, so I don't know. [00:36:51] Speaker A: Well, it can be manned, okay? Because there is. That does happen later on. Someone gets into Honey Bun and controls it. [00:36:58] Speaker B: Kind of looks listener like one of the tripods from War of the Worlds. Except that it's got four legs. [00:37:08] Speaker A: And the legs are like Kermit the Frogs. [00:37:11] Speaker B: Kermit the frogs feet. Yes. And it's got three, you know, dangly robot arms with claws like classic robot arms. [00:37:19] Speaker A: And its body is shaped like a leg. Leg Pantyhose container. [00:37:23] Speaker B: Yes. All right. Old Twinkle Toes has just radioed the Titans that he's found Honey Bun. But is that a good thing? [00:37:33] Speaker A: Let's find out. [00:37:35] Speaker B: All right. Flash reports that there's no doubt that Hans stole Honey Bun because he's got a remote control that he's controlling it with very clearly. I guess we were wrong in defending him. Soon, the other Titans arrived in the. [00:37:52] Speaker A: Titan's copter, and Honey Bun attacks. The copter attacks, which Han appears to be Hans. Appears to be controlling. [00:37:59] Speaker B: Yes. Kid Flash races out of the underbrush, grabs the remote control from Hans, and Hans takes off, hot foots it into the woods. Just then, another gentleman who looks remarkably like Dr. Paxton but is not, drives up, gets out of the car and fires a gun at Hans. [00:38:23] Speaker A: At Hans? Yeah. [00:38:24] Speaker B: He misses. [00:38:25] Speaker A: Thank God. [00:38:27] Speaker B: But Robin demands to know who this gentleman with the gun is. [00:38:33] Speaker A: I'm Dr. Michael Leiner Larner, researcher on the Honey Bun project. I was passing and saw the Varnik boy with the machine. He refused to halt, so I fired. [00:38:43] Speaker B: Well, that's. You're not an officer of the law, Dr. Larner, so I suggest you don't pull your pistol out of your glove compartment or wherever it was, and start firing at people. So there's no danger anymore. Kid Flash recovered the remote control, and Dr. Larner congratulates them on their fine criminal work. I shall return Honey Bun to the factory compound at once. And also make sure that all security measures are tripled. [00:39:15] Speaker A: Now they're going to. Teen Titans are going to track down Hans Wernick. [00:39:19] Speaker B: Yes, so they can solve the mystery. There's no mystery. Dr. Larner says Hans is just a plain spy. That's like. [00:39:28] Speaker A: But he's still a spy. He deserves shooting. [00:39:32] Speaker B: He sounds like Vita in Mildred Pierce. You're nothing but a common frump. He deserves shooting. That's right. [00:39:42] Speaker A: I'd rather take it off my hand than smacked you. [00:39:46] Speaker B: All right. Dr. Larner heads off in his car with Honey Bun tromping out behind. And now the search swings into high gear. On land, in the air and under the river, I suppose. [00:40:03] Speaker A: Yeah, because that's where exactly where Hans would be. [00:40:05] Speaker B: Yes. I don't think he's gonna be in a garbage strewn alley, Robin. But I guess that's where Robin's comfortable the most. [00:40:14] Speaker A: Well, they do find him. Kind of. [00:40:17] Speaker B: Kind of. But while the Titans search, other searches are at work too. The vigilantes, the Brown Shirts. The Brown Shirts in a pickup truck with a barrel full of tar. [00:40:27] Speaker A: They're going to tar and feather the boy when they find him. [00:40:30] Speaker B: Yes. And they do find him trying to sneak back into the Honey Bun plant. [00:40:35] Speaker A: Stupid kid. [00:40:37] Speaker B: All right. Moments later, Wonder Girl sees that the vigilantes have captured Hans. She's flying overhead, preparing to tar and feather him. She radios the other Titans. They arrive in the nick of time. Robin tells them they cannot take the law into their own hands. Give him to us and we'll turn him over to the authorities. [00:41:01] Speaker A: Well, the Brown Shirts aren't having anything to do with it. They said not a kid. Not a chance, junior. You kids can't tell us what to do. In fact, have a hot tar facial, Pretty boy. And he throws a mop full of hot tar at Robin. [00:41:12] Speaker B: Yep. [00:41:12] Speaker A: Robin, watch out. [00:41:14] Speaker B: Robin dodges that easily and orders the team to go into action. So Kid Flash gets the bag of feathers and creates the a messy diversion. They call him the Boy Bullet. I like that. All right. Robin and Aqualad start punching a couple of the guys. [00:41:36] Speaker A: The Brown Shirts grab Wonder Girl. Boy, are they in trouble. [00:41:39] Speaker B: I'll say. Because she takes off into the air. As we know, apparently Wonder Girl can fly versus just gliding on air currents, as Wonder Woman does. I mean, she says she's gliding on air currents, but she's clearly flying. She announces that. Something that it seems like everyone should know. That I can make my wrist bracelets magnetic by just willing it magnetic to skin. Or I guess, I mean, first of all, no, she can't. That's not a power of the bracelets. No, but Wonder Girl is infamous for revealing powers that she's never had before. Since, like in an issue of Brave and the Bold, also written by Bob Haney. She suddenly has the ability to mimic any voice. And she imitates Commissioner Gordon over the phone, did we read that? I believe we did. [00:42:38] Speaker A: I think we did. [00:42:39] Speaker B: Yes. And of course, I can make them non magnetic just as easily by unwilling it. [00:42:45] Speaker A: Well, I'm glad she's dropped them over water, but they are very, very, very high water. Hitting water at that height would probably break some bones. [00:42:56] Speaker B: You know what? Good riddance. [00:42:58] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:42:59] Speaker B: Yes. She flies them up into the air, that drops them into the river where they hit the. [00:43:05] Speaker A: I mean, they really hit the water hard. They would have broken bones. And then they're greeted by Aqualad in the river, who then punches them back up to the surface. So hard. So hard. [00:43:17] Speaker B: Yes, that they. [00:43:18] Speaker A: They're in the water. He hits them so hard, they fly out of the water and come back onto land. [00:43:24] Speaker B: Sure. [00:43:26] Speaker A: Clearly, these two men have just had multiple, multiple bones broken, which no doubt would probably lead to loss of consciousness and hospitalization. [00:43:38] Speaker B: Good. [00:43:39] Speaker A: Oh, I'm not defending. I'm just going to say that, you know, it's not just a whack em, sock em sort of thing. No, she literally dropped them from probably 100ft into a river. And they were met with punches by Aqualad that were so hard, it launched their entire bodies out of the water and onto land. [00:43:57] Speaker B: Sure. [00:43:57] Speaker A: Okay. [00:43:58] Speaker B: Well, there's certainly some natural buoyancy. [00:44:01] Speaker A: So finally, Robin and Kid Flash decide that they're going to tar and feather one of the guys. [00:44:04] Speaker B: Yeah, a couple of the guys. [00:44:06] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:44:08] Speaker B: Now they don't, you know, actual tarring and feathering. Back in the day, you. You stripped the victim naked and applied the tar right. To their bare skin and then put the feathers on and they usually died. [00:44:19] Speaker A: Yes. [00:44:21] Speaker B: So at least the tar is over top of their brown shirts. [00:44:27] Speaker A: All right, now inking on this next page. [00:44:31] Speaker B: Yeah. Artwork here is by Irv Novik, which is a change we've had. Nick Carty. [00:44:37] Speaker A: It's very good at this point. [00:44:39] Speaker B: Yes, we like Irv. All right, so the vigilant ladies are taken care of for the moment. But, Hans, I'm afraid you have a lot of splaining to do. [00:44:48] Speaker A: To the police, he says, I'm not a spy. Yes, I did steal the machine, but I only had to keep it from falling into. Oh, that's not a good accent. [00:44:59] Speaker B: Well, we really. We don't know where he's from, honestly. [00:45:01] Speaker A: Oh, he's from Hans. His name's Hans. He's from Germany. [00:45:05] Speaker B: Well, yes, but Germany didn't have dust up with the USA at this point. [00:45:10] Speaker A: They're referring to pre Cold War. I guess there's talking about that Historically, his countries had trouble with America. [00:45:17] Speaker B: Well, historically, his countries had trouble with every 67. [00:45:21] Speaker A: Though there's still a generation that fought a lot that fought in World War II. Okay, so listen. So he says he wanted to keep it from falling into the hands of a real spy. Someone from my own country, whom I recognize as working from an international espionage organization. How would a teenager know this? [00:45:39] Speaker B: I don't know. Maybe his father was in foreign service or something. [00:45:43] Speaker A: Right. He says that Carl Larner, Dr. Carl Larner, who works on the Honey Bun project, is actually a spy. [00:45:51] Speaker B: Karl with a K. So you know he's evil. What is that dog barking at? [00:45:56] Speaker A: It's a holiday weekend. There are neighbors walking around and loving the outdoor weather. We got the windows open. It's. It's beautiful. So bark. He's just barking at everything. [00:46:05] Speaker B: Well, we should again erect some kind of barrier when we get ready to record. So they have to avoid our house. [00:46:13] Speaker A: Why don't we just put a mask over Butler's eyes? [00:46:17] Speaker B: Like Ace the Bat Hounds? Yes, but without eye holes. [00:46:19] Speaker A: But without eye holes. [00:46:21] Speaker B: Okay. [00:46:21] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:46:23] Speaker B: All right. You've got to be mistaken, Hans, because we gave honey bunch to Dr. Larner, and he's returned it to the plant. [00:46:33] Speaker A: Oh, no. No, no, no, no. [00:46:35] Speaker B: You better check on that, bro. And if it is back at the plant, I will go quietly to face the consequences. So they do contact the police. And what do you know? The machine has not been returned to the plant, and Dr. Larner is missing from his lab. [00:46:56] Speaker A: Indeed. [00:46:57] Speaker B: I'm sure he's taken Honey Bun. Han says he's going to try to get out of the country or into the hands of the espionage organization apparatus here in America. Please let me stay in your custody while you look for Honey Bun and Larner. If I'm lying, then you can hand me over to the police later. That's a fair deal. [00:47:19] Speaker A: That's fair. So they've agreed? Yeah, but they'll have to take his chances. With what? The police and those vigilante creeps looking for him. So he says. We'll protect you as best as we can, but it won't be easy. So they get in the Teen Titans copter. Whirly Bird. [00:47:34] Speaker B: No sign of Honey Bun. Honey Bun would be hard to hide. Say, though, what's that down there that we're flying over? It's a float of the high school's mascot, the Big Bear. It's being towed to Smedleyville for tomorrow's football game. A game I will never see now, says Hans, because I'LL be in jail. What do you think? Those. Well, first of all, the float says the Lansford Bears will eat up Smedleyville. There is indeed a what, like 40 foot brown bear. [00:48:13] Speaker A: Brown bear? Yeah. [00:48:15] Speaker B: With cheerleaders flanking him? [00:48:17] Speaker A: No, they're just delivering it. This isn't a parade. Why are the cheerleaders on the float? [00:48:21] Speaker B: So they can do the cheer. One, one, two, tell me who are you? The Bears. Three, four, tell me who's going to score The Bears. Five, six, tell me who's got the kicks. The Bears. [00:48:33] Speaker A: Go Bears. [00:48:37] Speaker B: All right. They're just gonna follow along in the copter. And because Robin's Robin asks, is there an airfield in Smedleyville? Yes, there is. So Robin's got a hunch and he's gonna follow it all the way to Smedleyville. The float passes through a police roadblock. All perfectly normal. But as the big bear is towed beyond Lansford, on the outskirts of Smedleyville, something starts busting out of the bear. It's Honey bun. [00:49:14] Speaker A: Yeah. So how did the damn thing get there in the first place? Inside the bear? Well, if you look close the bear around Honey Bun. [00:49:22] Speaker B: Well, if you look, it looks like there's a giant zipper up the front of the bear. [00:49:25] Speaker A: Oh, okay. [00:49:26] Speaker B: So I imagine they just put it in. Zipped it up. Like. Did you ever have one of those stuffed animals that had like a secret compartment, a change purse inside or something? [00:49:36] Speaker A: I had a Snoopy. [00:49:37] Speaker B: Put your treasures inside. [00:49:39] Speaker A: I had a Snoopy that had its belly unzipped. And you would put your pajamas in it. Yes. You were going for a sleepover. Put your pajamas inside your Snoopy. I was way too old to have that. [00:49:53] Speaker B: But then you had some animal to sleep with. You had a friend. [00:49:57] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:49:57] Speaker B: A bed friend. [00:49:58] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:49:59] Speaker B: What were they called? Probably Pajama Pals. [00:50:02] Speaker A: I don't know. [00:50:02] Speaker B: That's what I'd call it if I was inventing it now. [00:50:05] Speaker A: Pajama Pal. [00:50:06] Speaker B: Alright, did Robin know something we didn't? Or is he just 10 times smarter than the rest of us? Well, yes, he's very smart. He's precocious, we used to say back in the day. Now we're getting all of the Teen Titans catchphrases. Merciful Minerva. Holy pigskins. Jumping jackfish. Whoosh. Jumping jackfish. Robin says holy blank. [00:50:33] Speaker A: Okay, but he usually is alliterative. Like holy Hannibal. [00:50:38] Speaker B: Oh, no, no, not Robin. Okay, the rest of them. Yes. [00:50:41] Speaker A: Okay. [00:50:44] Speaker B: All right, the. The copter is still trailing Honey Bun. It's headed right for the Smedleyville. Regional Airport, which oddly enough has a giant transport plane on the tarmac. They believe Hans now Dr. Larner. Larner is the real thief, and he's trying to take Honey Bun out of the USA in that plane. Honey Bun is already self loading on the transport plane. [00:51:14] Speaker A: No. [00:51:15] Speaker B: What? [00:51:15] Speaker A: No. [00:51:16] Speaker B: What? [00:51:16] Speaker A: Dr. Larner is inside Honey Bun. [00:51:20] Speaker B: Oh, okay. Fair enough. [00:51:22] Speaker A: Thank you. [00:51:24] Speaker B: I'm just saying. Robin says Honey Bun is being loaded, but it's not really being loaded. [00:51:28] Speaker A: It's being driven. [00:51:30] Speaker B: Ambulating. [00:51:31] Speaker A: Yes. [00:51:32] Speaker B: Robin sets the Titan copter down near the end of the Runway, and off they go. And Robin deducts that with the heavy freight of the plane, it will need every inch of Runway to get off the ground. So he orders Flash. Kid Flash to dig a giant trench in the middle of the Runway. [00:51:58] Speaker A: Why couldn't Wonder Girl just hold onto the plane? [00:52:02] Speaker B: It's too dangerous for a mere girl. [00:52:05] Speaker A: To do that, I guess. I'm thinking with 2025 brain. [00:52:07] Speaker B: You sure are. [00:52:08] Speaker A: Yeah. Because Wonder Woman just would have been like, I know she's not Wonder Woman, but Wonder Woman would have like just. She would have punched the plane, ripped off the propellers. Yeah. [00:52:17] Speaker B: As would Wonder Girl. Starting at about 1980 or so. [00:52:22] Speaker A: Okay. [00:52:23] Speaker B: All right. Kid Flash is not moving nearly fast enough. But he finally digs this giant hole in the ground, and the plane falls right into it. [00:52:34] Speaker A: But which is unfortunate because instead of stopping the plane, which a couple of them probably could have done with their powers. [00:52:40] Speaker B: Yes. [00:52:41] Speaker A: And strengths or whatever. Now the Runway which is needed for. For flying for other planes is ruined until it's repaired. [00:52:52] Speaker B: Because something that's not revealed here, but I just happen to know what. Smedleyville Regional Airport is. Where all of the mail to Titan's Lair takes off from. So they're not going to get their emergency mail. [00:53:07] Speaker A: Yeah. I hope they don't have any emergencies in Smithville too. Or the neighboring cities towns. [00:53:13] Speaker B: All right. Titan copter takes off again. Because Honey Bun is headed right for Smedleyville to force the town to provide Dr. Larner with safe passage from your miserable country. F you, Larner. The Titans rush to Smedleyville with the copter. Announce to the populace that they need to take cover because you're in danger from an advancing robot. [00:53:39] Speaker A: The robot they invented to make the people in the town help? [00:53:42] Speaker B: No, this is Smedleyville. That was Lansford who invented the robot. [00:53:45] Speaker A: Oh, okay. [00:53:46] Speaker B: Smedleyville has its own industry of mail. [00:53:50] Speaker A: It's a mail hub and air traffic. [00:53:54] Speaker B: All right. The great metal feet of Honey Bun shatter the quiet streets of Smedleyville. Dr. Lerner is astonished to find the town deserted. No matter. He's going to destroy the town anyway. Destroy. Destroy. But guess what? [00:54:13] Speaker A: The Titans fix him up. [00:54:14] Speaker B: They are waiting for Honey Bun. Dr. Larner orders Honey Bun now to kill the Titans. They try in vain to match their powers against the robot. And one by one, they are being beaten. [00:54:28] Speaker A: Oh, no. [00:54:29] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:54:30] Speaker A: Oh, no. [00:54:31] Speaker B: Yeah. Robin is knocked through a fence into someone's. I don't know. There's, like, a raised garden bed, but it's got a. [00:54:44] Speaker A: It's a victory garden. [00:54:45] Speaker B: Why is there a teacup in the middle of it? [00:54:47] Speaker A: It's probably a sandbox. Oh. [00:54:51] Speaker B: So it's not a victory garden at all. It's a sandbox. It's someone's yard. [00:54:57] Speaker A: We are given a glimpse of two feet of a box with earth in it and an object. [00:55:03] Speaker B: Oh, wait a minute. [00:55:04] Speaker A: Just go with it. What? [00:55:06] Speaker B: Well, our aging eyes neglected to see the word sand written on the side of the box. It's very hard to see. [00:55:17] Speaker A: It's very hard to see. [00:55:18] Speaker B: It's like one of those magic pictures. You have to focus your eyes the. [00:55:20] Speaker A: Right way to see it. Which is important because of what's about to happen. Yes. [00:55:27] Speaker B: God dang it. [00:55:28] Speaker A: We didn't even notice. No, that's where he gets the yes. Okay, so Wonder Woman is a Wonder Girl. I corrected it at the same time that you said it. Wonder Girl is tossed to the roof. [00:55:41] Speaker B: You shouldn't need to correct it. That's my point. [00:55:45] Speaker A: Well, Robin is Robin. Robin is always Robin. And there's Kid Flash and there's Aqualad. Yes, And Wonder Girl. [00:55:54] Speaker B: Wonder Girl has a modest outfit, whereas Wonder Woman dresses like a jezebel with her shoulders all bare. Or as my mother would say, she's about to lose a lung. [00:56:07] Speaker A: Already. [00:56:07] Speaker B: But as the vibrations of the oncoming metal giant jar Robin's groggy brain, Robin thinks if only I had a weapon to. Wait a minute. That's sand. He's regular kid MacGyver. [00:56:26] Speaker A: Mm. [00:56:28] Speaker B: All right. Robin starts pawing in the sand. He pulls out a pneumatic derringer from his utility belt. Its regular pellets wouldn't even tickle that robot. But maybe if I load it with sand. First of all, how's it gonna fire a steady stream of sand? [00:56:51] Speaker A: How's he gonna use his hands to fill whatever it is that he's going to. I mean, to fill a device that will shoot sand out of a handgun? [00:57:02] Speaker B: Well, he's a teenager. He's got very tiny hands. [00:57:07] Speaker A: All right, I'm just gonna have to suspend disbelief in that one. So he shoots sand at the joints of Honey Bun. Of Honey Bun. [00:57:18] Speaker B: Which works. [00:57:19] Speaker A: Works. It grinds up the gears in its be like putting sand in our knees. And it goes down timber. And then he reaches into the inside of the legs. Pantyhose container containing Dr. Lar. Lar. [00:57:35] Speaker B: Larner. [00:57:36] Speaker A: Larner. And pulls him out. [00:57:38] Speaker B: Pulls him right out. Dr. Paxton returns to thank the Titans. How can we ever thank you? Honey Bun has recovered and Hans has been completely cleared. [00:57:50] Speaker A: Yes, and you even showed us that Honey Bun needs more perfecting. So no enemy of Uncle Sam will ever put sand in its joints. Ha ha ha ha ha. [00:58:00] Speaker B: THEY ALL LAUGH CHEERFULLY Afterward. Well, what happened to the vigilantes? Is the xenophobia cleared up? [00:58:09] Speaker A: Well, if we use today as an example, someone in a position of power pardoned them for all of their wrongdoings and they're back home plotting their moves online with their incel groups, plotting their next moves. [00:58:23] Speaker B: Well, they didn't have online then, but they did have pamphlets. [00:58:27] Speaker A: But they were probably writing letters to each other and now those letters can't go out because the air freight. [00:58:31] Speaker B: Thank God. [00:58:32] Speaker A: Yes. [00:58:34] Speaker B: All right. Or, you know, if you ever just want to distract the populace, just give them something else to think about. Like the Titans. Now, they are not protesting the Titans, but they are counter protesting the non Titans. We dig Titans. Titans are terrific. Teriff. [00:58:56] Speaker A: Sorry. [00:58:58] Speaker B: Oh, the same sign writer here. Yeah, Titans and. [00:59:05] Speaker A: Oh, it's the Walkers. [00:59:07] Speaker B: If your friendly neighborhood newsstand hasn't gotten the next issue of Teen Titans, don't you picketer protest. Just make sure to get yours before they're sold out. Need we say more like two words? The end. Is it the Walkers? Is that what you're saying? [00:59:23] Speaker A: Yes. You didn't hear me? I said, oh, it's the Walkers. [00:59:25] Speaker B: Yeah, they were walking this morning when we went out for our bike ride and they waved at me. I waved at them and I tried to wave at them and I almost fell off my bike. I'm not accustomed to waving or riding with one hand. [00:59:40] Speaker A: Apparently I said hello to them this morning when I took both the dogs for a walk. [00:59:44] Speaker B: Well, they must walk four or five times a day. [00:59:46] Speaker A: At least four. [00:59:48] Speaker B: They started. [00:59:49] Speaker A: I remember they started during the pandemic. [00:59:51] Speaker B: Yes. [00:59:52] Speaker A: And they walk pretty much every single day. Four times a day. [00:59:56] Speaker B: Well, she does. Four times a day. He's not. [00:59:58] Speaker A: She's retired now. [00:59:59] Speaker B: I know. [01:00:00] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah, she's so young too. She's I guess she was an educator. And they live in the farm behind us. Yes, they're very nice people. [01:00:09] Speaker B: Except Butler hates her. I know, because her hair bounces. [01:00:12] Speaker A: Her hair bounces? Yeah. Although when he's with me, he doesn't get to bark or lunge or anything like that. He doesn't? [01:00:19] Speaker B: Well, I don't allow it. He just doesn't pay any attention to me. Yeah, because I guess I'm the beta dog. [01:00:26] Speaker A: I am definitely the alpha dog with him. [01:00:29] Speaker B: Well, you don't. If you need to announce that you're the alpha. You're not. [01:00:33] Speaker A: Oh. I'm just explaining to you why it is that I have it. I can effectively manage his behavior and you can't. Of course. Junebug loves you more than she loves me. [01:00:43] Speaker B: That's accurate. [01:00:44] Speaker A: Yes. [01:00:47] Speaker B: I forgot what I was gonna say now, so. [01:00:48] Speaker A: Well, you got sidetracked with trying to wonder me. Didn't you try to better me? Well, it's not that hard, is it? [01:00:55] Speaker B: No. [01:00:57] Speaker A: Are you on the mail page? [01:00:58] Speaker B: Yes. There's nothing interesting except there's lots of debate about whether Beast Boys should join the Titans or not. And a lot of people say yes, and some people say no. It should be Speedy. [01:01:10] Speaker A: Speedy? [01:01:11] Speaker B: Yes. [01:01:12] Speaker A: Isn't he just another version of the Flash? [01:01:15] Speaker B: No, Kid Flash is another version of the Flash. Speedy is green arrows. [01:01:19] Speaker A: Oh, Speedy. I'm sorry, comic fans. Sorry. [01:01:23] Speaker B: But that was confusing to me. When I was 10 years old, I could tell you, like, why is he called Speedy? Then I read the origin story and then I understood. [01:01:33] Speaker A: Okay. [01:01:34] Speaker B: Because he was fast on the draw. [01:01:36] Speaker A: Okay. [01:01:39] Speaker B: No Irene Barton, Officer. [01:01:40] Speaker A: No, I already scanned through, hoping to get a letter from Irene. Nothing. I scanned through that. I didn't see anything controversial or anything exciting to read. [01:01:49] Speaker B: Anything else to relay? [01:01:52] Speaker A: No. Hey. Wow. We got in just about an hour. [01:01:56] Speaker B: Yeah, right? First time in a while. [01:01:58] Speaker A: Yeah. That's great. [01:02:00] Speaker B: You can find us on social media at GoGoCheckPod. You can rate review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts from. You can find us on our sister podcast with Chuck Nerd Orchestra. You can find us right back here next week as well. [01:02:24] Speaker A: True. [01:02:24] Speaker B: With Batman. [01:02:27] Speaker A: Oh, we haven't had a Batman in a little while. [01:02:29] Speaker B: No. [01:02:30] Speaker A: Good. [01:02:31] Speaker B: And that's all I've got. [01:02:34] Speaker A: Well, I'm not sure when we're gonna be able to record next week. [01:02:37] Speaker B: Why? [01:02:38] Speaker A: Busy Saturday. [01:02:39] Speaker B: What's happening Saturday? [01:02:40] Speaker A: I'm gonna have a flute lesson on Saturday morning, and then I gotta come home and make dinner for our friends that are coming to dinner. [01:02:46] Speaker B: On Saturday night, Right? [01:02:48] Speaker A: Right, Right. Now, Sunday afternoon will be free. So I just wanna make sure that I read the comic before Sunday. [01:02:53] Speaker B: Sure. Well, I can help with dinner preparations. I know all about these entertaining thing. [01:02:59] Speaker A: Yes, you sure do. All right. [01:03:01] Speaker B: Right by. [01:03:03] Speaker C: You don't have to be a politician. You can change it all with a sin and dispositions of a heavy. And spread it all around. If you find yourself a frowning. Just turn it upside down. When you wear a sweet smile. The world will shout Hooray. You gotta turn on the sunshine. You gotta give in one time. You gotta turn on the sunshine. Push those blues away. Man, this dialectics too much.