Checkered Past Episode 6: Metamorpho 5/ All-American Men of War 114!

Episode 6 March 26, 2018 01:03:49
Checkered Past Episode 6: Metamorpho 5/ All-American Men of War 114!
Checkered Past
Checkered Past Episode 6: Metamorpho 5/ All-American Men of War 114!

Mar 26 2018 | 01:03:49

/

Show Notes

This week! Metamorpho 5 Cover date March/April 1966 Cover Price 12 cents Cover Artist: Joe Orlando & Charles Paris Edited by George Kashdan Featuring “Will the Real Metamorpho Please Stand Up!” Writer Bob Haney, Artist Joe Orlando & Charles Paris AND! All-American Men of War 114 Cover date March/April 1966 Cover Price 12 cents Cover Artist: Joe Kubert Edited by Robert Kanigher Featuring “The Ace Who Died Twice” starring Steve Savage, Balloon Buster Performed for you by the Our All-American Fighting Men of War at War Players Sound effects courtesy of http://www.freesfx.co.uk
View Full Transcript

Episode Transcript

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Are you ready? Yeah. [00:00:01] Speaker B: Are you with it? [00:00:02] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:00:02] Speaker B: Okay, let's go. You know what to do. The whole world's watching and counting on you. And all you people listening out there. Everybody everywhere. Hang on, hang on, hang on. [00:00:17] Speaker C: Welcome to Checkered Past, a loving postmodern examination of the Go. [00:00:20] Speaker A: Go. [00:00:21] Speaker C: Check branded comic magazines published by DC Comics between February 1966 and August 1967. I'm Dr. Bob and each week I'll be your guide on this trippy tour through 535 mid century masterpieces of graphic noveldom. [00:00:37] Speaker D: This week. Metamorpho 5 cover March, April 1966 cover $0.12 cover artist Joe Orlando and Charles Paris. Edited by George Kashdan. Featuring Will the Real Metamorpho please Stand up? Writer Bob Haney, artist Joe Orlando and Charles Paris and All American men of War 114. Cover date March, April 1966 Cover price $0.12 Cover artist Joe Kubert. Edited by Robert Kanaker. Featuring the Ace who Died Twice Starring Steve Savage. Balloon Buster Performed for you by the our All American Fighting Men of War at War Players. [00:01:17] Speaker C: Are you ready? [00:01:18] Speaker D: Are you with it? Then away we go. Simon Stagg and architect Edifice K. Bulwark worked to design a building made from new chemicals which can transform to accommodate multiple functions. They need Metamorpho to construct their building, but Rex refuses to help. Stagg then performs an experiment on Bulwark, changing him into a second element, Man. Bulwark then constructs the building using his new powers. When the building is finished, Stagg and Bulwark ride the elevator to the top. A mishap causes the elevator to break, but the new element, man, saves them. When the building undergoes the first transformation, it goes berserk, destroying other buildings and endangering Stag. The real Metamorpho returns and battles Bulwark. Rex must also work to protect the city from the rogue skyscraper. Rex finally defeats Bulwark, then changes into a meteor to smash the building. Stagg's experiment then wears off, permanently removing Bulwark's powers. Meanwhile, back In World War I, Lt. Steve Savage destroys two enemy balloons and a train, then returns to his airbase. He is followed by two German planes. Savage takes to the air again to shoot them down, but he is blamed for leading them there. The General excuses Savage for the mistake because he admires his fighting ability. Later, when the Germans attack a French town, Savage rescues a young French woman. Her brother, a pilot named Raoul, returns from combat, having been shot down by a German called the Undertaker. Savage allows the Frenchman to take his plane up to get his revenge. As the plane takes off, Savage is forced to ride on the wing. He promises Raul that he will allow him to kill the Undertaker. Raul succeeds, with Savage's help, but the Frenchman dies in the process. Savage then takes over the controls and lands the plane. Confused? You shouldn't be. We'll be right back to explain everything. [00:03:24] Speaker B: This is the story of the Element Man Metamorpho Metamorpho Starts out in old Egypt land Metamorpho Metamorpho Rex Mason was his real name Metamorpho Metamorpho A soldier of fortune didn't care about fame Metamorpho, Metamorpho until fate took a hand in the game what a change so strange Metamorpho, Metamorpho Metamorpho, Metamorpho Wrapped in a pyramid he saw a light Metamorpho Manamorpho it came from a glowing meteorite Metamorpho Metamorpho Shooting cosmic rays Stronger than the sun through his bright body and brain and when it was done there, yeah, there yeah, there yeah, yeah, yeah there stood the element Metamorpho, Metamorpho Strong as iron, Homely as sin Metamorpho, metamorphose He'll change into copper cobaltin Metamorpho, metamorpho Rearrange his molecule Just like that Become anything he'd like at the drop of a hat Be a hero, a king yet he'd chuck it all if he could be the one thing he just can't be Playing Rex Mason I know. Cause you see I am the element. [00:05:31] Speaker C: Hey, Dr. Husband. [00:05:32] Speaker A: Yes. [00:05:32] Speaker C: Hi. [00:05:33] Speaker A: Hi. [00:05:35] Speaker C: So, were you familiar with Metamorpho before this very moment? [00:05:39] Speaker A: I knew Metamorpho only from the record that I had as a child. [00:05:43] Speaker C: Yes, I've just played that song. [00:05:45] Speaker A: Okay. [00:05:46] Speaker C: And so now everyone's familiar with it. [00:05:48] Speaker A: This is the story of the Element Man. [00:05:51] Speaker C: So you don't need to hear anything else about Metamorpho. You understand the story. [00:05:55] Speaker A: Basically, he's a guy who was in an Egyptian pyramid, and he was. Was he a soldier of fortune? [00:06:01] Speaker C: Yes, a soldier of fortune. He's not interested in fame. [00:06:04] Speaker A: And there's something like the Staff of Ra, the star. Star of Ra, or something like that. [00:06:08] Speaker C: The Orb of Ra. [00:06:09] Speaker A: The Orb of Ra. The round thing of Ra. And he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. And he was changed into the Element Man. And his ability to use to change into any element he can conceive of or combinations of elements. And that's It. [00:06:24] Speaker C: Well, in fact, he was in the right place at the wrong time because he was sent to retrieve the Orb of Ra by millionaire Simon Stagg because it was reputed to have great mystic powers. And Mason, Rex Mason accepted the assignment thinking that the large fee offered him by Stagg would enable him to marry Stagg's daughter, Sapphire. [00:06:46] Speaker D: Sapphire. [00:06:48] Speaker C: But unknown to Mason Stagg's servant, the resurrected Neanderthal named Java Tall. Tall what? [00:06:57] Speaker A: Neanderthal. [00:06:59] Speaker C: Oh, come on. I know everything about imitation cavemen, all right? It's Neanderthal named Java. He had orders to maroon Mason in. [00:07:13] Speaker D: The orb's resting place, the lost Pyramid. [00:07:15] Speaker C: Of Achton in the valley of the Upper Nile. Attempting to escape, Mason was exposed to the rays of a meteor that was. [00:07:22] Speaker D: The source of the Orb of Ra. [00:07:23] Speaker C: Its unearthly emanations permanently altering the Manek molecular makeup of his body. In public, Mason wears a special synthetic mask designed to resemble his original features. [00:07:34] Speaker A: Okay, because he's so ugly underneath the mask. [00:07:37] Speaker D: He's very ugly. [00:07:39] Speaker A: Yeah. Why does Sapphire like him? Well, because he's a sweet man. [00:07:42] Speaker C: He's a. Yeah, he's a soldier of fortune. And maybe she has some daddy issues. We'll also get to that. Originally, Metamorpho could only turn into elements that were found within the human body. [00:07:58] Speaker A: Okay. [00:07:59] Speaker C: Now, I don't know if they stuck to that forever. Calcium and calcium and. But he turns into all kinds of cobalt and everything. I don't know. What's the human body made of? Water, mostly. [00:08:09] Speaker A: No idea. Well, yeah, water, carbon, calcium, sodium. [00:08:14] Speaker C: Yeah, stuff. Beauty, love. Oh, those aren't elements, are they? [00:08:21] Speaker A: Hydrogen. [00:08:21] Speaker C: Hydrogen, certainly. Everything has hydrogen in it. So let's see. We've got a millionaire with. With a bad haircut who has a pretty blonde daughter and a Neanderthal follower. This all sounds crazy. [00:08:37] Speaker D: Nothing like that could ever happen in real life. [00:08:39] Speaker A: Not at all. [00:08:40] Speaker C: I really like the purple orange color combination. [00:08:43] Speaker A: Okay. [00:08:44] Speaker C: As featured in Metamorphos Torso. That's not a costume. That's his body. [00:08:49] Speaker A: That's his body. Of the black trunks, though, are covering for modesty's sake. [00:08:53] Speaker C: Yes, with a big M belt buckle. Hey, how'd the other guy get an M belt buckle? [00:08:59] Speaker A: I have no idea. [00:09:00] Speaker C: You know why I like orange and purple so much? [00:09:02] Speaker A: No. [00:09:02] Speaker C: You remember Triplicate Girl? [00:09:04] Speaker A: Yes, the girl who. Who stood by and witnessed her own wake. [00:09:09] Speaker C: Yeah, I would do that. Wouldn't you? [00:09:11] Speaker A: Well, if you're Mark Twain, you might enjoy it. [00:09:14] Speaker C: Did he do that? [00:09:15] Speaker A: He did Knuckleberry Finn. [00:09:17] Speaker E: All right. [00:09:19] Speaker C: Triplicate Girl. When one of her bodies died and she became Duo Damsel. [00:09:23] Speaker A: Yes. [00:09:23] Speaker C: Later on, she had a costume that was half orange and half purple. [00:09:28] Speaker A: Okay. [00:09:28] Speaker C: And then when she split into two, one had all orange, one had all purple. [00:09:34] Speaker A: But those are great colors. Together, they really. [00:09:36] Speaker C: I don't know why they would be. It doesn't seem. [00:09:38] Speaker A: Well, they're. They're. I don't know if they're complementary colors or. I think there must be something about that being complementary. [00:09:44] Speaker C: I don't know. That sounds scientific. Metamorpho was created by writer Bob Haney and artist Ramona Fraen. [00:09:54] Speaker A: Yes. [00:09:55] Speaker C: Who was a woman working in the comics in the 1950s and 60s, which was the name? [00:09:59] Speaker A: Ramona. [00:09:59] Speaker C: Yes. But that was quite unusual. [00:10:01] Speaker A: Is it? Yes, rather, I should say. [00:10:03] Speaker D: Yes. [00:10:04] Speaker C: Not many women working professionally, but Ramona Frayden created Metamorpho. She did a lot of work on Aquaman. [00:10:12] Speaker A: Aquaman. [00:10:13] Speaker C: In fact, she created Aqualad. Then in the 70s, she did a big long run on the Super Friends. [00:10:20] Speaker A: Was Aquaman or Aqualad? Was Aqualad the nephew of Aquaman or the young version of Aquaman? [00:10:27] Speaker C: Neither. Oh, Aqualad was an orphan left to die. [00:10:34] Speaker A: Who? On the beach. [00:10:36] Speaker C: I think he actually was left on the beach because he had purple eyes, which was kind of a mutant throwback thing that people mistrusted him, and so they left him to die, and Aquaman found him and raised him. And here we are, Aquaman and Aqualad Metamorpho. [00:10:52] Speaker A: Great colors on the COVID Yes. [00:10:54] Speaker C: What was I going to say? Oh, Bob Haney, the artist? [00:10:58] Speaker A: No, the writer. [00:10:59] Speaker C: Writer. [00:10:59] Speaker A: Okay. [00:11:00] Speaker C: Now, I know you mentioned earlier that you had identified some very. [00:11:06] Speaker A: Some common traits. Common traits that I noticed with the Metamorpho comic that there was a sense of movement, that the language, the slang was heavily incorporated into the. Into their language, into their narrative. [00:11:20] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:11:21] Speaker A: And I got this sense of an urgency, and I said, I'm beginning to see a trend. What is it that I'm seeing? Why is it that I'm beginning to understand a style, a consistent kind of style to all these comics. [00:11:38] Speaker C: Does this remind you of anything we've seen before? [00:11:41] Speaker A: Middleman and Batman versus Apocalypso. [00:11:45] Speaker C: It's Eclipso. [00:11:46] Speaker A: Apocalypso. [00:11:48] Speaker C: So Batman versus Eclipso was written by Bob Haney. Bob Haney, who also created Eclipso, by the way. [00:11:55] Speaker A: Yeah. Who was the actor and who framed Roger Rabbit? [00:12:01] Speaker C: Bob Hoskins. [00:12:02] Speaker A: Bob Hoskins. [00:12:03] Speaker C: It's different. That's not the same. [00:12:05] Speaker A: No. He wasn't an artist, was he? [00:12:08] Speaker C: Not that I know of. Now he may be. He has Alzheimer's now. So it's. We don't want to talk. [00:12:14] Speaker A: Isn't that what we're all destined to get that are cancer? [00:12:16] Speaker C: Probably. My grandmother always said that deodorant with aluminum in it caused Alzheimer's, so she only would use ban deodorant. [00:12:24] Speaker A: Well, it didn't help her, did it? [00:12:26] Speaker C: It didn't because she actually had Alzheimer's. [00:12:28] Speaker A: Or dementia or something. She thought I was her son for a while. So we were talking about the artist. We were talking about. [00:12:34] Speaker C: No, writer. [00:12:35] Speaker A: The writer. And a consistent theme. [00:12:38] Speaker C: Yes. [00:12:39] Speaker A: And the idea that this reminded me a lot of the Batman television show. [00:12:45] Speaker C: Yes. So I'm gonna propose something. [00:12:47] Speaker D: What? [00:12:48] Speaker C: I'm gonna propose that this comic. Here we are in episode six. That this is the first comic to fully embrace the go go check sensibility. [00:13:00] Speaker A: And the Google check sensibility is campy. [00:13:04] Speaker C: Mod 600 slang, lots of youthful slang, trying to hook into the youth market. [00:13:12] Speaker A: Just crazy stuff and not very serious. Perhaps. [00:13:16] Speaker C: Well, now let's talk about Bob Haney. [00:13:19] Speaker A: Okay, Bob Haney. Okay. [00:13:20] Speaker C: Bob Haney, unlike most other comic book writers in the history of comics, didn't give a F for realism or continuity or logic or science or physics or anything. [00:13:38] Speaker A: Well, you can't screw around with metamorpho because some of the readers might understand how chemicals are put together. [00:13:43] Speaker C: Well, trust me, he did screw around with a lot of things. When you're reading a Bob Haney story, your instinct is to say, this doesn't make any sense. This can't happen. [00:13:57] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:13:58] Speaker C: In any imaginary or real universe. And we're going to get more of this. So Spiderman is a different company, but go on. [00:14:07] Speaker A: His boss, rather, rather Peter Parker's boss. [00:14:10] Speaker C: Is J. Jonah Jameson. [00:14:12] Speaker A: J. Jonah Jameson, editor of the Daily Beagle. And so Simon Stagg is drawn very much like J. Jonah Jameson. [00:14:19] Speaker C: Well, J. Jonah Jameson has a crew. [00:14:23] Speaker A: Cut, but he has the black and the white hair and the extreme chin and the. The harsh look. [00:14:29] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. Simon Stagg has more of a kind of a comb over with wolverine wings. [00:14:37] Speaker A: With what on the sides? [00:14:39] Speaker C: Wolverine, Wolverines. Or maybe we'll call it Farrah Fawcett feathering on the sides. [00:14:45] Speaker D: It's a really odd hair. [00:14:46] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. We open with Rex Mason in disguise. [00:14:51] Speaker A: Yes. [00:14:52] Speaker C: Sapphire Stagg, daughter of Simon Stagg, wearing. [00:14:55] Speaker A: What I think is a fez on his head. [00:14:59] Speaker C: It. [00:14:59] Speaker A: I mean, it is a fez. [00:15:01] Speaker C: Yeah, it's a fur fez. Fez. [00:15:03] Speaker D: Well, he's a soldier. [00:15:04] Speaker C: Of fortune. He probably picked that up in Russia on one of his many travels. Fortune hunting jaunts. [00:15:12] Speaker A: On the subway. And someone there, he's got armful of Christmas presents. [00:15:17] Speaker C: So he. There's a bomb on the subway. So he forms his mouth into the end of a Hoover vacuum. [00:15:26] Speaker A: Yes. Takes it into his body and it explodes. [00:15:30] Speaker C: And blows his mask right off his face. Yeah, the mask doesn't look too happy with that. [00:15:36] Speaker A: No, he lost the fez too. Yeah, he blew the clothes right off his body too. [00:15:42] Speaker C: Now he kept the. [00:15:44] Speaker A: The underwear that. [00:15:46] Speaker C: Thank God. Who knows what that looks like. [00:15:49] Speaker D: The rest of his body is so weird. [00:15:54] Speaker C: So metamorphose ugly. [00:15:56] Speaker A: He is hideous. [00:15:57] Speaker C: He's in fact subtitled the Freak of a Thousand Changes. Yet the public adores him. Yeah, they want his autograph. Sapphire's making out with him in the back of the car that Java is driving. [00:16:13] Speaker A: His face looks like it's been kicked in a lot. [00:16:16] Speaker C: It does. Like when I first became aware of Metamorpho, I thought he had no nose. [00:16:21] Speaker A: Me too. But if you look at Stagg. What's his name? [00:16:26] Speaker C: Simon Stag. [00:16:27] Speaker A: Simon Stagg. He also looks like he has no nose. [00:16:29] Speaker D: True. [00:16:30] Speaker C: This issue is drawn by Joe Orlando. Not Ramona. Freda. This was the first issue that she didn't draw. She only did the first four issues. Unfortunately, they're not gogo checked, so we can't consider them in our evaluation. So Simon Stagg's gonna build this new building in the middle of whatever town they're in. New York. Does it say where they are? [00:16:54] Speaker A: I don't remember the town. [00:16:56] Speaker C: It doesn't matter. [00:16:57] Speaker A: Well, there's a subway, so it's got to be New York or Chicago. [00:17:00] Speaker C: Right? More London. [00:17:04] Speaker A: They're not in London. [00:17:05] Speaker C: I know. Just saying that. [00:17:06] Speaker A: Right. [00:17:08] Speaker C: The building is going to be five times larger than any other skyscraper in the city. [00:17:14] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:17:15] Speaker C: And it's going to have its heaviest structure at the top. [00:17:18] Speaker D: At the top. [00:17:19] Speaker C: Which means it would crack in two and fall over. [00:17:22] Speaker A: Well, it's made of chemicals. [00:17:25] Speaker C: What does that mean? I. [00:17:27] Speaker A: You know, all I can think of is. Is the gelatin you make. [00:17:30] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:17:30] Speaker A: And, you know, I don't know how it stays together, so I don't know. [00:17:37] Speaker C: What I think of is plastics when I think of chemicals making things. [00:17:43] Speaker A: So the thing is, it turns from a skyscraper into a stadium. [00:17:48] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:17:48] Speaker A: What about all the furniture and the people inside? When it turns from a skyscraper to a stadium, do they just get squished and reprocessed into the chemicals? [00:17:56] Speaker C: I mean, I hope that someone has thought that through, but I doubt that they have. [00:18:01] Speaker A: Well, we don't see it later on that anyone's thought it through. [00:18:04] Speaker C: Simon Stagg has brought in his architect friend, Edifice K. Bulwark. [00:18:11] Speaker A: Now this is a great name for an architect. [00:18:13] Speaker C: It's a fantastic name for an architect. Bulwark. How do you say it? [00:18:16] Speaker D: Bulwark. [00:18:17] Speaker A: February. [00:18:17] Speaker C: February, February. Edifice K. Bulwark, who's going to build the metamorpho of skyscrapers, as it were. You know, metamorphose, kind of like a one man, metal man. [00:18:31] Speaker A: He's only limited by his imagination and science. [00:18:34] Speaker C: Right. And in fact, here we're on page seven, he turns his arm into a Christmas tree. [00:18:39] Speaker A: So. Okay, my first problem with this is on page six when. When they get into it. When Simon Stagg and Metamorpho get into it. [00:18:45] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:18:45] Speaker A: And they want this edifice cable work to. Simon Stagg would like to build the Chemo skyscraper. Yeah, that. That Edifice K. Bulwark has designed. And he wants Metamorpho to help and metamorphosis. Wait a second. This magazine, I got this mag, it's got an article in here about your pal Bulwark. [00:19:08] Speaker C: I see. [00:19:08] Speaker A: This whole chemical building idea is a crazy crackpot dream. Yeah, the headline in the magazine article is Big Builders Chemo Skyscraper, Potential Threat sure to backfire. What, has he been carrying that around in his back pocket? [00:19:24] Speaker C: Well, he doesn't have pockets because all he's wearing is trunks. I imagine the magazine was thoughtfully placed on a table in the lobby of wherever they are. I guess it's Simon Stagg's apartment. Or maybe Sapphire had it in her handbag. [00:19:43] Speaker A: I really don't know. I don't know. But I mean, when you think about. When you're having an argument with a friend and you think about some sort of factual information that you have to pull up, you don't just have that magazine sitting around that newspaper on the table. That's not how life works. But again, we're on an adventure here, aren't we? [00:20:01] Speaker C: Yes, and it's Bob Haney. So where do they go? Metamorpho and Sapphire all of a sudden are on a tropical island. [00:20:08] Speaker A: Well, she just gets so frustrated. Metamorpho walks out after the fight and she follows her. Her sweetheart. [00:20:16] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:20:16] Speaker A: And they decide to go take a vacation during Christmas. And he and they go to a tropical island and they're gone for two weeks. [00:20:24] Speaker C: Her bikini top, I'm not sure how that's staying up because it. There's nothing hooked over her shoulders or neck. And the way that her. What do we call these in polite society? Lungs. That's what my mother would say. She's about to lose a lung. [00:20:43] Speaker A: Yeah, I don't really know. I'm distracted by the fact that Metamorpho is on the beach with her and then creates a Christmas tree. Presto, change o. A chloride tree with bromine balls and a shell for little girls who still believe in Santas with calcium beards. Yeah, who cares what he makes it out of? [00:21:07] Speaker C: And how is he. It's like he's doing a plank. But no, his arms are not involved. [00:21:15] Speaker A: He's propping himself up on one plank. But he's got a nautilus shell on his neck. [00:21:18] Speaker C: But he's holding a shell and then creating a Christmas tree with his. [00:21:22] Speaker A: Oh, that's true. Maybe he's extended his arm to do a nice cobra pose. [00:21:27] Speaker C: Or maybe he's the beach. Maybe he's turned his legs into the beach. [00:21:31] Speaker A: Like Danny the earth or Danny the street. [00:21:35] Speaker C: Oh, that's a good reference. Some of our listeners will get that moving forward. [00:21:42] Speaker A: Go ahead. [00:21:43] Speaker C: There's lots of machinations going on here. Behind the scenes. Simon Stagg and Edifice K. Bulwark. [00:21:49] Speaker A: Oh, the Orb of Raw. [00:21:50] Speaker D: The Orb of Ra. [00:21:51] Speaker C: Now, listen. [00:21:52] Speaker A: Okay, so I just want to say, yeah, Edifice K. Bulwark looks like a hideous, skinny, freakish man. [00:21:59] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:21:59] Speaker A: When he takes his shirt off and I'm like, I would like to look like that. [00:22:04] Speaker D: He's ripped. [00:22:06] Speaker C: He's got like a 12 pack. No kidding. So the Orb of Ra. Did we mention this already? It can harm Metamorpho. That's kind of how I didn't know that. Yes. So that's how Simon kind of can keep control of Metamorpho. Not only because Metamorpho wants to marry his daughter, but if Metamorpho gets out of hand, the Orb of Ra can hurt him, can weaken him. [00:22:32] Speaker A: Well, he should use it to help change him back to normal. [00:22:35] Speaker C: Well, I don't think it works like that. Otherwise he would have done it. So. [00:22:43] Speaker A: Java. [00:22:44] Speaker C: Java is an unfrozen caveman in the monkey boy long tradition of fictional cavemen, which I know all about. We're going to see another caveman in a couple of weeks. Also written by Bob Haney. [00:23:01] Speaker A: Okay. [00:23:01] Speaker C: In Teen Titans. So I don't know if Bob Haney had a particular fascination with caveman. I'll do some Google research before our next. Before our episode with the Teen Titans. [00:23:12] Speaker A: I Know someone who has fascination with caveman? [00:23:14] Speaker C: It's me. I love caveman. I love caveman movies. I love caveman comics. I love caveman stories. [00:23:19] Speaker A: You have art? [00:23:20] Speaker C: Art. I have caveman art. Tattoo on my arm. I even love real stories of cavemen. [00:23:27] Speaker A: Mm. [00:23:27] Speaker C: Maybe I was a caveman in a past life. [00:23:30] Speaker A: What page are you on now? [00:23:32] Speaker C: I'm on the letters page. [00:23:33] Speaker A: Oh. Butler's pounding his paws into my back. [00:23:36] Speaker C: I know, but you love him, so I do. [00:23:39] Speaker A: He wants me to scratch his belly. [00:23:41] Speaker C: He loves you. So Captain Butler's the dog. Everyone that you hear scratching and licking. [00:23:46] Speaker A: Groaning in the background. I was scratching his belly silently, and then I stopped and he went. [00:23:52] Speaker C: I had to insist for our listeners. [00:23:55] Speaker A: That the sand toy, squeaky toy be taken away from him. [00:24:00] Speaker C: The letters page is filled with letters from girls praising Metamorpho. Praising Metamorpho. Irene Vartanoff of Bethesda, Maryland, just about. [00:24:13] Speaker A: 90 minutes from here. [00:24:15] Speaker C: She is so excited that there's a letter page in Metamorpho and says, metamorpho, baby, you're my kind of man. If I didn't have Green Lantern. [00:24:26] Speaker D: Well. [00:24:28] Speaker C: You know all about Green Lantern. [00:24:30] Speaker A: I know all about Green Lantern. [00:24:32] Speaker C: We'll be getting to that a couple of weeks. [00:24:35] Speaker F: Really? Sure. [00:24:36] Speaker A: Oh, my God. I'm so excited. He's like. He is my favorite comics character. [00:24:40] Speaker C: What do you like about him? [00:24:42] Speaker A: I like his hair. I like the fact that he's only limited by his imagination to create his powers. I like that there's a lineage related to his ring and that there's a kind of a deep story there. [00:24:55] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:24:57] Speaker A: I like his outfit. [00:24:59] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [00:25:01] Speaker A: And the fact that he was a pilot. [00:25:04] Speaker C: Yes. Test pilot, wasn't he? [00:25:06] Speaker A: Well, the same thing, right? Test pilot. He actually took it off the ground. [00:25:10] Speaker C: Well, yeah, but, I mean, he wasn't just, like, a commercial airline. [00:25:13] Speaker A: Oh, no, no. He was a test pilot. [00:25:14] Speaker C: Fighter pilot. [00:25:15] Speaker A: Cool. [00:25:16] Speaker C: Yeah. So Karen Conley of Chillicothe, Ohio, also likes Metamorpho, but also thinks that Sapphire is the most beautiful picture of a woman in the whole magazine. [00:25:32] Speaker A: Sapphire has extreme cat eyes. [00:25:33] Speaker C: Extreme cat eyes. Now, we have to remember that these letters are commenting on a different artist of Sapphire. I don't think Sapphire is that pretty. Here, boy. [00:25:43] Speaker A: She's the greatest in a swimsuit. [00:25:45] Speaker C: I'll say. Because her swimsuit won't stay up. [00:25:47] Speaker A: And you were pretty neat when you pulled that cobalt shield trick to protect her. Karen Conley, Chillicothe, Ohio. [00:25:53] Speaker C: Now, does the human body have cobalt in it? [00:25:57] Speaker A: I don't even Care. [00:25:58] Speaker C: I'm gonna need some scientists. [00:26:00] Speaker A: Can we just move on? [00:26:02] Speaker C: Yes. [00:26:04] Speaker A: Someone will know. We need to bring in a scientist like your sister. [00:26:07] Speaker C: I've got a scientist on board to do the next metalman. [00:26:10] Speaker A: You do? [00:26:10] Speaker F: Yes. [00:26:11] Speaker A: We need a nurse. [00:26:13] Speaker F: You're a nurse. You make a difference. [00:26:18] Speaker C: Well, I know a nurse, so we'll get one on board. Although I did talk to my nurse friend last night. She couldn't be bothered to listen to our podcast. [00:26:27] Speaker A: Nurse friend. [00:26:28] Speaker C: Yes. Okay, you know who I'm talking about. [00:26:30] Speaker A: Okay. [00:26:31] Speaker C: My sister. [00:26:34] Speaker A: She won't listen to our podcast. [00:26:35] Speaker C: No, she doesn't like comic books, so that's that. Maybe she'll be interested if she's on it. [00:26:41] Speaker A: We should do a podcast about wine. She'd listen then. [00:26:44] Speaker C: Oh, snap. So we're moving on. The building's been built. [00:26:48] Speaker A: Oh, yes. [00:26:49] Speaker C: Flipping pages by the fake metamorpho. [00:26:52] Speaker A: Fake Metamorpho? [00:26:54] Speaker C: Rex may send in Sapphire back from their vacation with so many gifts, it. It's ridiculous. Java's got a pile of gifts stacked on the back of his back, nine feet high, tied to his back, in. [00:27:05] Speaker A: Fact, like a pack mule. [00:27:07] Speaker C: You know, Neanderthals were much more muscular than human beings in the upper body. Right. They also had wider nostrils so they could get more oxygen. [00:27:18] Speaker A: God. Metamorphose ugly. I mean, he really is. It looks like he. It looks like he smashed his face into a wall. [00:27:25] Speaker C: Yeah, he's not very attractive. [00:27:27] Speaker A: And why does Sapphire, with her extreme cat eyes, like him so much? [00:27:32] Speaker C: Well, I mean, he's been a soldier of fortune, so he must have some money. [00:27:37] Speaker A: He has a heart of gold. [00:27:40] Speaker C: Oh, I see what you did there. [00:27:42] Speaker A: I didn't. He just came to me. Brilliant. [00:27:45] Speaker C: Look at this on page 12. [00:27:46] Speaker A: Yes. [00:27:47] Speaker C: Look at the bottom panel. [00:27:48] Speaker A: Yes. [00:27:49] Speaker C: Sapphire's got a bonsai tree in her room. [00:27:52] Speaker A: She does. Where does she find the time to work on that? [00:27:55] Speaker F: I don't know. [00:27:56] Speaker C: But who would have thought that in the 1960s people were talking about bonsai? [00:28:00] Speaker A: Oh, I'm sure they were. You know, I had a bonsai tree one time. [00:28:03] Speaker C: You did? And. [00:28:05] Speaker A: Oh, it didn't last very long because I just. [00:28:08] Speaker C: They. [00:28:08] Speaker A: They take very long to grow. And I just kept on think, looking at it, going, well, I'm sure I could just clip this leaf here and clip this leaf. By the time I was done, I was just. Poor thing. How's that? Like a twig with two little leaves on it. Yeah, it's okay. [00:28:23] Speaker C: Well, the fake metamorpho comes in and starts battling the real metamorpho. [00:28:27] Speaker A: Yes. [00:28:29] Speaker C: Now look at the things they could do. One of them is making cobalt fists. [00:28:32] Speaker A: I see that. And the other one is. [00:28:34] Speaker C: The other one is making a magnet, your traditional red and white striped magnet, out of his arm. Because cobalt's magnetic, you know. Simon Stagg bursts in, reveals that Metamorpho 2 has built the chemo scraper. Chemo. Chemo. [00:28:54] Speaker D: How are we pronouncing chemo? [00:28:56] Speaker A: Like chemical chemo. [00:28:58] Speaker C: Chemo. [00:28:59] Speaker A: We say chemotherapy. Chemo scraper. [00:29:01] Speaker C: We flash forward to the next day. [00:29:03] Speaker A: Yes. [00:29:05] Speaker C: The mayor is cutting the ribbon of the new building. [00:29:07] Speaker A: Wait, you completely skipped over the fact that Java is absolutely obsessed with Sapphire. [00:29:16] Speaker C: Oh, yeah. [00:29:17] Speaker A: Every single second that he gets to think out loud or that he is given dialogue, it is all about Sapphire and how much he hates Metamorpho. [00:29:28] Speaker C: Yeah, I. Well, come on. If you are objectively looking at the two of them, Metamorpho and Java, he. [00:29:38] Speaker A: Would think he had a chance with her. [00:29:39] Speaker C: I mean, honestly, he's more attractive than Metamorpho is, even though he's a caveman. [00:29:47] Speaker A: You know, I'm not going to. I disagree. But, you know, whatever. [00:29:52] Speaker C: You would go with Metamorpho with smash face and no nose. [00:29:55] Speaker A: I would just walk away. I'd take a credit card and go on a vacation forever. [00:29:59] Speaker C: My mother had an uncle. Uncle Harv. [00:30:01] Speaker A: Yes. [00:30:01] Speaker C: She always said he looked like a monkey. And in fact, in old photos, he does look a lot like Java. [00:30:10] Speaker A: Did he have a deep set brow? [00:30:12] Speaker C: Deep set brow, yes. Low hairline and that kind of, you know, scowly mouth. Yeah, he did look like a caveman. [00:30:25] Speaker A: What page are you on now? [00:30:26] Speaker C: I'm on page 14. [00:30:28] Speaker A: Okay. [00:30:29] Speaker C: The building's being opened. Rex Mason is here. [00:30:32] Speaker A: It looks kind of like the Space Needle a little bit. [00:30:34] Speaker C: It does look like the Space Needle, except not possible to actually build in real life. [00:30:40] Speaker A: Right. [00:30:41] Speaker C: Because there's no. Nothing to support the base right now. I'm not a scientist or an architect, but I can. [00:30:48] Speaker A: But I know how wind and large structures work, and that wouldn't stand up. [00:30:52] Speaker C: And tell you that's going to topple over. [00:30:53] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:30:55] Speaker C: The whole group of them get into the elevator. Fake Metamorphos, Simon Stag, Sapphire, Java and the Mayor. And the elevator goes crazy, much like the TrackPad on my MacBook. I have to tell you, really, it's. First of all, it goes places that I don't want it to go. [00:31:15] Speaker A: Okay? [00:31:17] Speaker C: Sometimes it just moves by itself. Sometimes it will just make the screen giant size, like, expand all the text so it's giant Size. Like I'm blind. This all happened since last night when I just got a little water on it while I was cooking because I had pull up a recipe on my. [00:31:38] Speaker A: No, on the trackpad. [00:31:39] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:31:40] Speaker A: Have you wiped it down with, like, a cloth? [00:31:42] Speaker C: Several times. [00:31:42] Speaker A: Oh, my gosh, Bob. Well, you better call the Genius Bar. [00:31:46] Speaker C: I don't have time for that. [00:31:48] Speaker A: You better make time if your computer doesn't work. [00:31:50] Speaker C: Do you know how far I live from a Mac store? [00:31:52] Speaker A: I do. Two hours. [00:31:55] Speaker C: I don't know why they can't come to me. [00:31:58] Speaker A: It just doesn't work. [00:31:59] Speaker C: Don't they know who I am? [00:32:00] Speaker A: Why didn't they put one in Frederick, Maryland? Frederick's not that small of a city. No, it's the second largest city behind, isn't it? After Baltimore. [00:32:06] Speaker C: Yes. [00:32:07] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:32:07] Speaker C: Plenty of people there have Max. [00:32:09] Speaker A: Of course. [00:32:11] Speaker C: Well, here we are. Fake metamorphone has to save them all from the crazy elevator. Something's happening now with tubes spewing chemicals and all of a sudden the building starts spinning like a dreidel. [00:32:23] Speaker A: That's a good description. That's exactly what it does. It spins like a dreidel and then. [00:32:27] Speaker C: The top shoots off. [00:32:29] Speaker A: Saucer section. Yeah. I mean, it's spinning so quickly that it loses its top. [00:32:33] Speaker C: And it's also catching on fire. [00:32:35] Speaker A: Yeah. Spewing chemical fire everywhere. [00:32:39] Speaker C: Spewing hot globs of chemical fire. People down below running for their lives. Fake metamorphos. Sapphire, Simon Stag and Java Alt and the mayor. Topsy Turvy within the building, which is now spinning around the city and melting all the other buildings. [00:33:01] Speaker A: Right. [00:33:03] Speaker C: I don't know what's going to happen next. Part three. Will the real metamorpho please stand up? The final part, the spinning dome of the building is about. [00:33:15] Speaker A: It's heading toward a playground full of children. [00:33:18] Speaker C: Playground full of children. The real Metamorpho has turned himself into hydrogen gas. You called that out earlier. He is creating a big buoyant cushion of hydrogen gas to stop the spinning building. [00:33:33] Speaker A: Have it safely land on the ground away from the children. [00:33:36] Speaker C: Rejoice. [00:33:37] Speaker A: Yes. They say words like neat and keen. [00:33:42] Speaker C: Well, that's how children Talked in the 60s. The building starts spinning again. It's shooting nitric acid out on the playground. Well, that would be good for the children. [00:33:55] Speaker A: I liked the words that are used to describe the sounds like glop and swoosh. [00:34:00] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah. [00:34:02] Speaker A: Glop, blop and swoosh. Yeah. And whoosh. So on the next page, we just. [00:34:08] Speaker C: Get more footage of the inside Just people just flailing. [00:34:14] Speaker A: Right, right. They're flailing about in the spinning. [00:34:17] Speaker C: Is this what you were talking about when you said that each page compels you to turn to the next? [00:34:22] Speaker A: Yes. There's a sense of action, drama. There's a sense of movement. And you just want to just turn up the next page to find out where this is going. [00:34:33] Speaker C: Oh, here's a nice gag at the bottom of page 20. Fake Metamorpho jumps out of the spinning building and says, knave, you've made your last metamorphosis and metamorphose as nave. I thought only characters in brand Eck Comics talked that way. That's a reference to Marvel Comics brand Eck. [00:34:56] Speaker A: Oh, really? [00:34:57] Speaker C: Because in Marvel Comics of the 60s, everyone spoke in Shakespearean dialogue. Oh, yeah, it was kind of goofy. That's why I didn't like Marvel Comics when I was a lad. [00:35:10] Speaker A: Okay, you liked the more popular dialogue one. [00:35:15] Speaker C: I mean, Marvel Comics were certainly more popular than DC Comics then and now. But everybody didn't talk like it was the most important thing they were saying in the history of mankind. Plus, DC heroes would have coffee together, really talk things out. Yeah, Marvel heroes always. If they met, they would fight. [00:35:38] Speaker A: So we're on page 21 already. No, there's something interesting on page 20. [00:35:45] Speaker C: Sorry, I'm so over there. [00:35:48] Speaker A: Okay. [00:35:50] Speaker C: Metamorpho is turning his right arm into a fountain of lie. [00:35:56] Speaker A: Yes. Sodium hydroxide. [00:35:59] Speaker C: Yes. Fake Metamorpho turns his whole body into it so nothing happens. [00:36:04] Speaker A: But then the real Metamorpho. [00:36:07] Speaker C: Yes. [00:36:08] Speaker D: Oh, wait. [00:36:08] Speaker C: Which is real and which is fake? I don't know anymore. Yeah, I guess this is the fake one because he's saying buffoon. That's kind of Shakespearean, isn't it? [00:36:18] Speaker A: Yes. That gives us the. The idea that it's the old fashionedy one. [00:36:23] Speaker C: And real Metamorphos still using cool hip slang like yow. It's reacting with the sodium, but good. [00:36:34] Speaker A: So we have a little chemistry experiment here. Or chemistry lesson. [00:36:38] Speaker C: Tet. A tet. [00:36:39] Speaker A: Yeah. Sodium hydroxide mixed with water, and I guess it makes it explode. [00:36:45] Speaker C: Is that like Mentos in Coke, when you can make the Coke explode? Have you seen that on YouTube? [00:36:53] Speaker A: Nope. [00:36:54] Speaker C: People put Mentos in a Coke bottle and close it up and shake it, and then it explodes. It makes, like a rocket. [00:37:01] Speaker A: Really? [00:37:02] Speaker C: Yes. [00:37:03] Speaker A: Like, does it. Do they like a 1.5 liter, 2 liter bottle and like a rocket, they just. [00:37:11] Speaker C: Yeah, you put the Mentos in, you shake it up. It might be Diet Coke. [00:37:14] Speaker A: Okay. [00:37:15] Speaker C: I'm not sure and then you set it on the ground and it shoots up in the air like a rocket. [00:37:23] Speaker A: Do you sit on the ground with. With the top facing down, or. [00:37:27] Speaker C: I'm gonna have to get back to you on that. Okay. I haven't done my research ahead of time. [00:37:32] Speaker A: I mean, because if it really shoots up a rocket, could it shoot at you and hurt you? [00:37:35] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, it's very dangerous. That's why there's YouTube videos, people doing it with the risk of getting hurt. Round two of the battle of the Element Men is beginning on page 22. Now, here's where I see the similarities to the metal man, because both metamorphos have turned themselves into hollow containers which are containing other elements which I guess they've also created. So fake metamorphose turned himself into a vat of nitroglycerin, and real metamorpho has turned himself into a charcoal tube and is sucking the nitroglycerin into his own body. [00:38:25] Speaker A: Right. [00:38:27] Speaker C: I don't understand how any of this works. [00:38:30] Speaker A: No, I don't either. But he says something like, got to convert it into porous. Got to convert into porous charcoal to absorb that stuff. Just like a dynamite stick. [00:38:40] Speaker C: Is dynamite made of charcoal? [00:38:42] Speaker A: No, I. I'm. I mean, I. I don't know about these things. [00:38:48] Speaker C: Well, I don't. [00:38:49] Speaker A: I mean, dynamite has nitroglycerin in it, I suppose. [00:38:54] Speaker C: Well, that. [00:38:55] Speaker A: We need our chemical expert here. [00:38:57] Speaker C: Do you know I have a very high aptitude for natural sciences? [00:39:00] Speaker A: Do you? [00:39:01] Speaker C: I'm sure I would have been a great proficient had I ever learned. [00:39:04] Speaker A: Had I ever learned. [00:39:07] Speaker C: Now both metamorphos are melting. [00:39:10] Speaker A: Thank God. [00:39:12] Speaker C: No, we don't want the good metamorpho to melt. [00:39:14] Speaker A: It just means that we're drawing to the end of the story. [00:39:16] Speaker C: You don't like the story? [00:39:17] Speaker A: Oh, it's. It's a bit long. [00:39:21] Speaker C: One element, man, arises from the wreckage of the fight with a hiss. Blop, blop. [00:39:30] Speaker A: Right. [00:39:30] Speaker C: But which one is it? [00:39:31] Speaker A: We don't know. [00:39:32] Speaker C: We sure don't, Sapphire. Look at that tear. That single tear dripping down your face. [00:39:38] Speaker A: Giant cat eyes. [00:39:40] Speaker C: Do we call those cat eyes? [00:39:42] Speaker A: Well, what else could they be? [00:39:44] Speaker C: Well, I don't know. It looks like she just has. It looks like her pupils are made of candy and that they're just stuck on her face. You know what I mean? [00:39:56] Speaker A: Yes, I do. Ribbon candy. Like those, those blue mints. [00:40:02] Speaker C: So whichever metamorpho this is, is shooting. [00:40:06] Speaker A: Up into the atmosphere as a hydrogen. [00:40:08] Speaker C: Hydrogen Gas. [00:40:09] Speaker A: Gas. And then converts himself into. [00:40:14] Speaker C: A carbon and iron meteorite. Right. [00:40:17] Speaker A: Gains speed and catches fire as it reenters the atmosphere and plunges into the. [00:40:23] Speaker C: Into the chemical skyscraper. Chemical Chemo Scraper. Chemo Scraper is completely gone. [00:40:30] Speaker A: Right. [00:40:31] Speaker C: It was the real metamorpho, leaving behind Edifice K. Bulwark now turned back to human form and ripped. Look at him. [00:40:43] Speaker A: I should only look so good now. [00:40:46] Speaker C: He kind of looks like Uncle Sam. [00:40:49] Speaker A: Yes, but ripped. [00:40:50] Speaker C: Well, I. I mean, honestly, that's probably what Uncle Sam looks like shirtless. Right. [00:40:56] Speaker A: Sure. [00:40:57] Speaker C: He's the American ideal. [00:40:58] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:40:58] Speaker C: Only just old with a goatee. [00:41:00] Speaker A: Right. [00:41:01] Speaker C: Chemo Scraper is gone. Simon Stagg is comforting. [00:41:05] Speaker A: Not quite sure if K. Bo. What is his name again? Edifice K. Bulwark. [00:41:12] Speaker C: Edifice K. Bulwark. Yeah. [00:41:14] Speaker A: Is going to jail or not? I have no idea what's going on with him. [00:41:18] Speaker C: Probably not, because rich people don't go to jail. [00:41:21] Speaker A: Right? [00:41:24] Speaker C: So that's the end. Happy ending for everyone except for Edifice K. Bulwark and Java. [00:41:32] Speaker A: Jabba doesn't get the girl. He doesn't get Sapphire. And Edifice Bulwark does not get to destroy all the other buildings which were made by his competitors. Apparently, that is the super objective here in the story. To destroy all of the buildings, all the competitors buildings. [00:41:46] Speaker C: Well, that's kind of how it works in the real world. [00:41:48] Speaker A: Well, I liked the story for the. The artwork, the sense of drama, the way it did move forward. I thought after a while, I was like, okay, this story is really dragging on here. [00:41:59] Speaker C: Yeah. I didn't like the artwork, I have to tell you. [00:42:01] Speaker A: You didn't? [00:42:02] Speaker C: No. [00:42:02] Speaker A: Oh. [00:42:05] Speaker C: I don't like artwork that looks like I could have drawn it. [00:42:11] Speaker A: I've seen your drawings. [00:42:12] Speaker C: Yes. [00:42:13] Speaker A: I think you're right. You could have drawn this. [00:42:16] Speaker D: Thank you. [00:42:17] Speaker C: I'll take that as a compliment. [00:42:19] Speaker A: Well, you are. You aren't. You aren't one. A professional artist. I like your drawings very, very much. [00:42:25] Speaker C: I do appreciate the panel placement. We're doing a lot of experimenting with panel sizes and shapes. [00:42:33] Speaker A: Yes. And. And they're. They're not all symmetrical, and some of them bleed into the other ones. So this is the reason I say you notice. Like in page 22, you notice that when the two metamorphos are battling each other, the figures go into the other panels. [00:42:49] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:42:50] Speaker A: Bleed over, bleed over, bleed over. Okay. [00:42:54] Speaker C: Now this is why I say it's the full flower of the go go check generation, because it's very much like the Batman TV show, isn't it? With these. Isn't it with cuts and split splat. And then different angles and. And the sound effects. Yes, of course. So we'll see how this develops. [00:43:15] Speaker A: Bob, when was this actually on the shelves? [00:43:18] Speaker C: March, April 19th. On the shelves probably January 1966. [00:43:22] Speaker A: So I had Superman. I'm sorry, Batman had. Had just premiered in January. Right. Just premiere of 1966. So it hadn't quite caught on yet, had it? [00:43:31] Speaker C: Right. But you know, we're not gonna probably just create that style out of the blue. It's grown out of things like. [00:43:39] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:43:39] Speaker C: James Bond movies and things like that. [00:43:43] Speaker A: Okay. [00:43:44] Speaker C: Very cheeky sense of humor. [00:43:45] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:43:47] Speaker C: It's the. The mod-60s in London. That's where it's all coming from. [00:43:51] Speaker A: Sure. British invasion. Sure. [00:43:53] Speaker C: I'm just saying that. I don't actually know if that's true, but it makes sense to me. [00:43:57] Speaker A: Okay. [00:43:58] Speaker C: All right. That's all we have to say about Metamorpho. We have something very special coming up. Are you ready? [00:44:05] Speaker A: I'm ready. [00:44:06] Speaker C: Can you handle it? [00:44:07] Speaker A: I can dig it. [00:44:09] Speaker C: The our all American fighting men of war at war Players Awesome. Are going to tell us all about Lieutenant Steve Savage, the Balloon Buster. You want to know a little bit about him? [00:44:24] Speaker D: Sure. [00:44:25] Speaker C: Raised in Mustang River, Wyoming, Steve Savage was trained by his poverty stricken father to be a consummate marksman. Learning that the gun is merely an extension of the man who wields it. At his dying father's bedside, Savage swore to make the old man proud of him by making Savage a name to be remembered. Enlisting in the Army Air Corps at the onset of World War I, Savage repeatedly disobeyed orders, breaking formation to attack and destroy the German combat balloons. Zeppelins. [00:44:58] Speaker A: Zeppelins. [00:44:59] Speaker C: Which earned him his nickname, Balloon Buster. Though his commanding officer, Major Michaels, continually sought to court marshall Savage, General Talbot of high command applauded his actions and demanded he be kept in combat. That sounds like a setup for a sitcom, doesn't it? Like Gomer Pyle. [00:45:21] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:45:22] Speaker C: Well, we're going to have a dramatic reading of the Steve Savage story. [00:45:27] Speaker A: Great. [00:45:29] Speaker C: What's the name of the story? The Ace who Died Twice. [00:45:31] Speaker A: Awesome. [00:45:32] Speaker C: I hope you enjoy it. [00:45:33] Speaker A: Me too. [00:45:34] Speaker D: Here it is. Checkered Past proudly presents our All American Fighting Men of War at War theater. Only the savage battle skies of 1917 could hold the the Ace who flew on after he was dead to help the Balloon Buster keep a promise. Fighting men still whisper about in the. [00:45:53] Speaker C: Ace who died twice. [00:45:56] Speaker F: Lieutenant Steve Savage reportin for duty. [00:46:06] Speaker D: 1917. A French airfield. [00:46:09] Speaker F: It's a kraut plane attacking right over our Own field. Those coffin kills on his Fokker. Spell out the Undertaker. [00:46:20] Speaker E: The Undertaker was the only crowd ace with the icy nerve of a wildcat who'd claw at one of our spads over our own field. [00:46:29] Speaker F: There's a tiny coffin dropping out of the plane with a note inside. [00:46:34] Speaker D: Read it, Savage. [00:46:36] Speaker F: This is what will happen to any fool who durs to attack our observation balloons. Signed, the Undertaker. If I can only get up thar, maybe I can bury him for good. Oh, no. He ripped my prop plane apart. He grounded me. [00:47:00] Speaker E: When a pursuit pilot has dreams, they sure are bad. And they're usually about the same thing. Being nailed in the cockpit by enemy Spandaus, flying into an exploding Jer balloon or being barbequed in a ship spinning like a torch to no man's land. But not me. I kept on reliving my own special brand of private hell when I was a kid back in Mustang. Mustang River, Wyoming. [00:47:34] Speaker D: Steve Savage ain't got no call to kill them poor cowpokes just because they spoke the truth. Sure, old man Savage was worthless trash and as loco as a sunstruck coyote. And his son Steve's even more spooked. [00:47:53] Speaker E: I remember the official send off I got out of town. [00:47:58] Speaker D: We don't want the likes of trash like you, Savage. You'll wind up useless tumbleweed like your old man. So don't come back to Mustang river less you want to be rid out on a rail. [00:48:18] Speaker E: There was only one person in Mustang River I had to see before I left. [00:48:24] Speaker F: I'll make the whole world take notice of the name of Savage Paw. You'll see. You'll see. I'll make you proud of me. [00:48:34] Speaker E: Maybe it was the wind from the prairies that made me think I heard. [00:48:38] Speaker C: My pa. Now, Steve, nothing can stand. [00:48:43] Speaker D: In front of your gun sights and live. It's a gift. Be sure you use it for good. And always remember, son. I repeat, always remember. When you shoot, forget you've got eyes, arms and legs. Forget about your heart beating, your lungs breathing. [00:49:09] Speaker E: You're the gun. [00:49:11] Speaker D: You're the gun. I repeat, you're the gun. [00:49:17] Speaker E: Yeah, I did have a gift that my PA gave me. But I didn't have a chance to use it till sheer luck squeezed me into the air force and into a spad. [00:49:30] Speaker C: Thar's the crowd. [00:49:31] Speaker F: Gas bags that have been directing the shell fire that's been turning doughboy trenches into a mass grave. No wonder it couldn't be spotted. They're attached to a train. Can't get a bead on this Gas bag. The fire is shaking my gun mount so hard I'm missing the target by maul. The only thing that's saving this balloon hide is the guns on the train. But they're shore skinning my hide. [00:50:06] Speaker E: So I went for the other balloon at the other end of the train. [00:50:12] Speaker F: Can't let out the air out of the other gas bag either. Not with all them guns on the train. Stomping my ship to death as I halt. [00:50:22] Speaker E: Stick the guns aboard. That train sounded like the hootin of the people of Mustang River. [00:50:30] Speaker F: That's old man Savages, kid. [00:50:33] Speaker D: Worthless trash like his loco old man. Ha ha ha. Imagine a useless tumbleweed like that ever amounting to anything. [00:50:46] Speaker E: I wrenched the spad back till ever war screamed like the wind over the prayer at night. I tried in the only way I could. [00:50:56] Speaker F: I'm the gun. I'm the gun. I'm the gun. [00:51:01] Speaker E: The gunners had their sights too high, figuring I was going to try for the balloons again. That was their mistake. [00:51:10] Speaker F: The laughing stopped. Hear that paw? The laughing stopped. I told you they'd remember the name. [00:51:17] Speaker E: Of Savage after I got back to my field. I didn't get more than one leg out of the cockpit when. [00:51:26] Speaker D: Savage, you look like a saddle tramp, not a lieutenant in the Air Force. You're not fit to be a member of this squadron, the Air Force or the army. [00:51:37] Speaker F: Know something, Major? If you was wearing a tin star stead of a maple leaf, you'd remind me of the sheriff of my hometown. [00:51:47] Speaker D: Savage, I'll break you if it's the last thing I do. I'll. [00:51:53] Speaker F: It's two flying pal bearers from Fritzi, the Undertaker's squadron. They must have tailed me into the field. I didn't even spot them. It's my fault they've set up this ambush. [00:52:07] Speaker D: End of Part 1 Part 2 of Balloon Buster and the Ace who Died Twice. Next Coming soon on checkered past, look. [00:52:20] Speaker F: Up in the sky. [00:52:21] Speaker C: It's a super cat. A super horse. [00:52:25] Speaker D: And Supergirl at last. By popular demand from thousands of her fans, the mighty Maid of Steel stars in her own 80 page giant, with her pets Streaky and Comet, and of course, her cousin, Supa Man. Plus, a surprise feature, Supergirl's Fortress of Solitude. Coming soon. And now, part two of Lieutenant Steve the Balloon Buster. In the sizzling conclusion to a battle tale, the Ace who Died Twice. [00:53:02] Speaker E: As I gun my spade across the field, the Focker pilots lashed at me like they had bullwhips in their hands. [00:53:11] Speaker F: They know I can't bring my own Guns to bear on em less I lift my ship up. [00:53:18] Speaker E: I figgered they'd figure only a loco maverick would stay on the ground and get stomped. So I stayed. Even when a slug blazed along my ribs. [00:53:30] Speaker F: They played, put their brand on me. [00:53:34] Speaker E: I kept my ship glued to the. [00:53:36] Speaker F: Ground till the firing stopped. They passed over me as I yanked. [00:53:43] Speaker E: My ship up off the field in a screaming half loop. [00:53:47] Speaker F: Those owl hoots are still killing men. But now they're in front of my sights. [00:53:55] Speaker E: I wasn't no fancy flyer like the Major or other aces. So I just stayed right where I was and lined up the two fokkers from the circus of the jury Ace they called the undertaker. [00:54:10] Speaker F: I remember what you taught me, Pa. When you shoot, forget you've got eyes, arms, legs. Forget about your heart beating. Forget about your your lungs breathing. Forget you're human. Only remember that you're the gun. I'm the gun. I'm the gun. I'm the gun. [00:54:36] Speaker E: My sod burned like dry grass as I almost wiped off my wheels slammin the Spad down. [00:54:45] Speaker D: Savage, you opened the door for those Jerrys. You let them tail you to this field. You're responsible for the men they killed. I'll recommend you for a court martial for. Major, while you recommend Lieutenant Savage for a court martial, I'm going to recommend him for a medal for blowing up two balloons and the whole train they were attached to. Not to mention the pair of Fokkers he just downed. Any other pilot equal that day's work? No, General. Major. The war's going to be won by the side that does the most damage in the shortest time. By the side that has killers like Savage. How about a deal? You don't recommend him for a court martial and I won't recommend him for a decoration deal. Just as you say, General. [00:55:38] Speaker F: They're turning their backs on me like I was a rattler. [00:55:43] Speaker E: It was lonelier than the graveyard at Boot Hill at the field. So I took off. [00:55:49] Speaker D: Savage, come back. You're stealing government property. [00:55:54] Speaker F: Only borrowing transportation, Major. You can file charges later. [00:56:03] Speaker E: I was turning to town when I heard the drumming of motors and saw the street leap up. [00:56:09] Speaker A: Whoa. [00:56:12] Speaker F: That girl's so spooked by the bombing from that zeppelin that she can't move from that bullseye she's standing on. [00:56:21] Speaker E: I managed to scoop her up with a rodeo lift just as. As I headed up the street, I heard the hammering of machine guns and I could almost make out the white coffin tallies on the coal black pane of. [00:56:37] Speaker F: It's that Kraut they called the undertaker. He's nailing those two Newports that tried to down the Zeppelin. Monsieur, my two brothers are Newport pilots. Thank heavens they are in Paris on. [00:56:52] Speaker E: Leave with the dog. Fight over. The undertaker began swatting at us just for the fun of it. The burning of my ribs from the slug cruising. It flared up as I tumbled across the stone floor with the girl. [00:57:08] Speaker F: The shelling, the shilling. My heart is splitting with the sound of shilling. The best way to forget one kind of noise is with another kind of noise. See if that gramophone can still play. And if it does, play it real loud. Oui, oui, monsieur. [00:57:30] Speaker E: I didn't know how to dance, so I just stood thar, holding on tight to her till I could feel her turning soft and warm in my arms. [00:57:40] Speaker F: I ain't never been close to anyone. [00:57:43] Speaker C: As purty as you. [00:57:45] Speaker F: Monsieur, you are bleeding. You have been wounded. [00:57:49] Speaker E: She made me sit down while she bandaged me. [00:57:53] Speaker F: Thanks, Denise. Looks like I owe you a petticoat. No, no. It is my sacrifice for the war effort. It is like the fair lady's scarf. The knight of old war when he went into battle. Mon Dieu, Raoul. What happened? I thought you and Henry were on leave in Paris. [00:58:20] Speaker D: We were called back this morning, Denise. Henri. [00:58:25] Speaker C: Henri is dead. [00:58:27] Speaker D: The two of us were shot down over this town when we attacked a bush zeppelin. I am still alive, but I have no plan to avenge our brother's death at the hands of the undertaker. [00:58:42] Speaker F: Maybe I can help you out. I'm in so much trouble already. They can only hang me once for breaking another rule. Raoul. Raoul. Do not fight again. He isn't on his death. Enough. [00:58:57] Speaker D: Henri has saved my life more than once. I must repay my debt to him or I will never rest. Adieu, Denise. [00:59:07] Speaker E: I sneaked back to the field with Raoul while everyone else was at mess. [00:59:11] Speaker D: Monsieur, you are a fighting man. You understand what a man must do. I will never be able to repay you. [00:59:21] Speaker F: Good luck. Better take off afore you're spotted. [00:59:25] Speaker E: Suddenly, slugs began whistling our way. [00:59:30] Speaker D: Your comrades have opened fire. They cannot recognize you at this distance. In the twilight, they probably think we are spies. [00:59:39] Speaker F: Take off. We'll both be safer in the air. [00:59:43] Speaker E: As I held onto the wing struts, I noticed the Frenchman's face turned pale with pain. [00:59:49] Speaker F: Raul, you didn't walk away from that crash without a scratch. You were hurt in that dog fight. Better let me take over so I can set down the ship and get you to the medics. [01:00:02] Speaker D: No, no. If you. You were in My place. You would do the same fight to the death for a loved one who was sent down in flames by a laughing killer. Promise. No matter what happens, you will let me finish the fight with the undertaker or I will never be able to sleep in peace again. Promise? Promise. [01:00:28] Speaker F: Okay, I promise. [01:00:30] Speaker E: Raul dropped a note over the undertaker's field, challenging him to come up and fight. The answer didn't come from the field, but from blazing slugs ripping into the back of the cockpit. From a coal black ship with coffins painted on it for each victory. [01:00:50] Speaker F: The undertaker was hanging above his field all the time, waiting for someone to strafe his way field the way he did to mine. I couldn't see him. That's why we flew into his sights like clay pigeons. [01:01:04] Speaker C: Raoul. [01:01:05] Speaker F: Raoul, you're here. [01:01:09] Speaker D: You promised I would finish the fight no matter what happened. You will keep your promise to a dying man. [01:01:21] Speaker F: Oh, I will never rest. Your guns are jammed. We gotta hightail it out of here. We're just cold meat on the table for that Jerry Butcher. No, no. The fight. [01:01:41] Speaker D: You promised I would finish the fight. You'll probably stay. You promised. I will fly the ship. I will tie my hands to the stick so if I weaken, they will not fall away. [01:02:05] Speaker F: He. He's gone. I'm depending on a dead man's hand on the stick to fly straight course so I can get a bead on the ace that shot him down. [01:02:18] Speaker E: I thought I heard the Undertaker laugh as he saw me out on the wing like the hootin of all the people who said my pawing me was worthless trash. [01:02:31] Speaker F: I'm the gun. I'm the gun. I'm the gun. [01:02:37] Speaker E: I emptied my gun and waited for the undertaker to nail a lid down on me. [01:02:43] Speaker C: But instead. [01:02:47] Speaker F: He stopped laughing. Raul, I'll take the controls over now. [01:02:53] Speaker E: As I headed back to the field and what was waiting for me for breaking the rules in the Major's book. I didn't care. [01:03:03] Speaker F: I kept my promise to you, Raul. You finished the fight. [01:03:08] Speaker D: You flew a straight course till I. [01:03:11] Speaker F: Could gun down the Undertaker. [01:03:14] Speaker C: I'll bring you back now. [01:03:18] Speaker D: And so the curtain falls on the most unpredictable fighter in the battle of 1917. Lieutenant Steve Savage, balloon buster. Will he fly again? With wild frenzy, battling friend and foe alike? Should he even be allowed to keep on fighting? Stay tuned.

Other Episodes

Episode 216

August 30, 2023 00:58:58
Episode Cover

Absent Without Steve (Wonder Woman 166)

I think we can all agree on three things that we all hate: Misogyny, Racial Stereotypes, and Steve Trevor. Find out why in this...

Listen

Episode 61

June 30, 2019 00:52:33
Episode Cover

Is a Leopard the male equivalent of a Cougar? (House of Secrets 78)

The wonders of the modern world are such that we can record a podcast about Eclipso mere hours before an actual eclipse! What is...

Listen

Episode 269

December 12, 2024 00:56:00
Episode Cover

The Costume DOES Make the Man (Jimmy Olsen 99)

It's Jimmy's Birthday! (November 29, according to the 1976 Super DC Calendar!) What more could a boy wish for than three super-powered costumes and...

Listen