Me Too! Three, Even! (Brave and the Bold 64/Metal Men 18)

Episode 2 February 24, 2018 01:05:18
Me Too! Three, Even! (Brave and the Bold 64/Metal Men 18)
Checkered Past
Me Too! Three, Even! (Brave and the Bold 64/Metal Men 18)

Feb 24 2018 | 01:05:18

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Show Notes

Misogyny reigns this week as we explore Brave and Bold #64 and Metal Men #18. Sorry, women, for everything ever!!

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Episode Transcript

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Are you ready? Yeah. Are you with it? Yeah. Okay, let's go. You know what to do. [00:00:05] Speaker B: The whole world's watching and counting on you. [00:00:08] Speaker A: And all you people listening out there. Everybody everywhere. Hang on, hang on, hang on. [00:00:17] Speaker B: Welcome to Checkered Past, a loving postmodern examination of the Go. [00:00:21] Speaker A: Go. [00:00:21] Speaker B: Check branded comic magazines published by DC Comics between February 1966 and August 1967. I'm Dr. Bob, and each week I'll be your guide on this TR Trippy Tour through 535 mid century masterpieces of graphic noveldom. This week, the Brave and the Bold 64 cover date February March 1966 cover price, 12 cents. Cover artist Gil Kane. Edited by George Cashin. In which Batman beats a B girl on the behind and Metalman 18. Cover date February March 1966 cover price, $0.12. Cover artists Ross Andrew and Mike Esposito. Edited by Robert Kaniger. In which a marauding mechanical marvel manhandles Magnus metallic mates. Are you ready? Are you with it? Then away we go. [00:01:21] Speaker A: Go. [00:01:30] Speaker B: Batman vs. Eclipso written by Bob Haney. Drawn by J. Winslow Mortimer. Batman is reunited with a love from the past, a woman named Marcia Monroe, and he soon gets caught up in a plot by the Cyclops organization to steal the priceless Emerald cat jewel. Framed for the theft of the jewel, Batman is arrested and jailed, giving the Cyclops organization and their operative, the Queen Bee, the opportunity to capture Eclipso just as he emerges from his host, Bruce Gordon. While Eclipso is used to make a heist, Batman manages to break out of prison and with the help of Marcia and Bruce, Gordon defeats Eclipso, shunting the villain back into Gordon's body and toppling Cyclops plan. Although Batman manages to identify that Marcia Monroe was really Queen Bee all along, she manages to get away and Batman vows that one day she will have to answer for her crimes. But he will be there to stop her. Meanwhile, over in Metal Men the Dinosaur who Stayed for Dinner written by Bob Kanagar. Drawn by Ross, Andrew and Mike Esposito. Doc Magnus receives a dinosaur charm bracelet from an unknown admirer. The dinosaur comes to life and grows to giant size. The Metal men try to destroy the beast and. But Tina befriends it instead by feeding it dinner. When the robot dinosaur then tries to eat Doc and Tina, the other Metal Men knock it out. The robot revives and abducts the metal men, taking them to an alien planet, where they meet the dinosaur's robot inventor. The inventor wants to replace Doc and court Tina. Tina sees through the act and scorns the robot's affections. The angered robot tries to throw Doc and Tina in a boiling cauldron with the other metal men. However, the other robots, now alloyed together, prevent Doc's incineration. The robot dinosaur is ordered to take the metal men into deep space. But instead he returns them to Earth, disobeying his creator. Confused? Same. I'll be right back to break it down right after this message from the public Service announcement. Players. [00:03:46] Speaker A: Public service announcement. [00:03:47] Speaker B: Theater presents Smoking is for Squares outside the Civic Auditorium. Come on, Bob, don't be chicken. Take a butt. You'll feel cool. Sure, it'll make you feel 10ft tall. And then you'll see how the girls flip for ya. No, thanks. After what I just heard in there, I'm not gonna ruin my health. That's telling them, Bob. Gee, it's Miss American Teenager, Paulette Breen. It's bad enough that adults smoke. They at least might have had the excuse of not knowing any better. But now that doctors and scientists have definitely proved the health hazards in smoking, it's just plain silly. Time to worry about my health when I get old. It ain't hurting me now, perhaps. But it's a tough habit to break when you want to. So it's better not to get started. Don't be a square. Stop smoking and prolong your life and health. And if you want to feel 10ft tall, try getting there through your own genuine efforts. And instead of such artificial ways as smoking, Take it from me. Girls who are hip don't flip for fellows who smoke, say, if a kitten like Miss American Teenager feels that way that's good enough for me. Presented as a public service in cooperation with the National Social Welfare Assembly Coordinating Organization for National Health, Welfare and Recreation Agencies of the USA Foreign. We're back. Hello. We're talking about the Brave and The bold. Number 64. Batman, the caped crime fighter versus Eclipso. Hero and villain in one man, a kep. [00:05:58] Speaker A: Ellipso. [00:05:58] Speaker B: Eclipso. Eclipso. Safe to say pretty much everyone's familiar with Batman at this point. But Eclipso might be a strange name to you. [00:06:10] Speaker A: He was for me. [00:06:11] Speaker B: Really? You want to hear a little bit about him? Sure. Eclipso was the alter ego of scientist Dr. Bruce Gordon. While attempting to view a solar eclipse out in a remote jungle, a tribal sorcerer by the name of Mo Fear attacked Gordon. The fight caused Gordon to fall to his death off a cliff. And during the battle, Mo Fear had wounded Bruce with a black diamond. The black diamond would Allow Gordon to survive, but to be transformed into the villainous eclipso whenever an eclipse occurred. Do you know there's roughly 18 eclipses every year I. Somewhere in the world. Wait, am I right on that? It might be one eclipse every 18 months. In which case, eclipso wouldn't be much of a threat, I don't think. [00:06:52] Speaker A: Well, it depends on where you are. [00:06:53] Speaker B: But 18 a year, that could do it, I guess. So now I'd like to start the show by apologizing to all women everywhere throughout all of history and time. [00:07:05] Speaker A: Well, based upon the comics that I'm reviewing, we would have to start every. [00:07:11] Speaker B: Show with that, probably. But these two comics are particularly egregious. So the COVID. [00:07:20] Speaker A: Yes. [00:07:21] Speaker B: Has Batman scaling a building with some kind of suction cup devices. [00:07:25] Speaker A: I don't know where he's pulled them out of, you know, his bat belt. Well, he doesn't use them later on. [00:07:31] Speaker B: Well, I don't know. [00:07:33] Speaker A: When we come to this scene later on, he actually has little suction cup fingertips that he pulls from his utility belt. [00:07:39] Speaker B: Notice that? [00:07:40] Speaker A: Yes. I often notice things. You don't. [00:07:42] Speaker B: You sure do. [00:07:43] Speaker A: That's why you're here. And Eclipso is on this window cleaning device. [00:07:49] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:07:50] Speaker A: Yes. And I don't really understand what. What his power is. This Eclipso person, apparently he. He shoots dark light at or dark, dark light at someone and renders them powerless. Or. [00:08:04] Speaker B: I'm not exactly clear what the light does. I know that it's from that black diamond that saved Dr. Bruce. [00:08:10] Speaker A: Yes. And apparently through it. [00:08:12] Speaker B: And it shoots a beam out. [00:08:13] Speaker A: Yes. And he. So he takes this black diamond and puts it in front of his eclipse side, and it shoots dark light and renders someone powerless. Then he switches it with his fingers over, switching his hand and puts it in front of his light side, and it shoots a powerful beam of light, apparently, which he does. [00:08:35] Speaker B: See, that's something. I didn't even notice the difference. [00:08:37] Speaker A: Well, you see him when he. When he. When he holds up the truck and he steals the money, he blows up the thing. It's. It's just. It's not a very practical way. I mean, I'm sure it's powerful, but, I mean, you have to hold this diamond in between your. Your index finger and your thumb and switch it from one side to. That's his weapon. That's his weapon. This little black diamond that he, what, carries in his pocket. And then he just looks through it and shoots energy through it. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard. I was very disappointed. [00:09:07] Speaker B: Listen, I didn't write it, all right? [00:09:08] Speaker A: Okay. [00:09:10] Speaker B: He's also got a pointy head and pointy ears. [00:09:13] Speaker A: Yes. [00:09:14] Speaker B: And an Anderson Cooper muscle tee. [00:09:15] Speaker A: He looks like the second Darren from Bewitched. A little bit. [00:09:19] Speaker B: I guess I could see he's got. [00:09:20] Speaker A: The pointy chin and the pointy head and such. [00:09:23] Speaker B: Before we get to the actual comic itself, look at the ad on the inside front cover. Treasure chest of fun. [00:09:30] Speaker A: Yes. [00:09:31] Speaker B: Oh, so much fun. We don't have these things these days. [00:09:34] Speaker A: No, we don't. [00:09:35] Speaker B: Where would you even get this stuff? A silent dog whistle? [00:09:39] Speaker A: Well, you can get. [00:09:40] Speaker B: I guess I'll talk at the store. [00:09:42] Speaker A: Yeah, you can. Joy buzzers. That's always fun. Did you ever have anyone shake your hand with one of those joy buzzers? No. I did. [00:09:50] Speaker B: Are you sure you weren't being tased? [00:09:51] Speaker A: It was very funny. [00:09:54] Speaker B: Worms. Drop these seemingly innocent pellets into a glass of water and magically a worm will appear. [00:10:00] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:10:02] Speaker B: I wonder if they're real. [00:10:02] Speaker A: Can you imagine the look of horror on your victim's face? [00:10:06] Speaker B: I can, but do you notice that. [00:10:08] Speaker A: There'S no apostrophe there? [00:10:09] Speaker B: No X ray specs. [00:10:11] Speaker A: A classic trick black onion gum. [00:10:15] Speaker B: Miniature secret camera. What are they selling to kids back then? [00:10:19] Speaker A: All sorts of spy things. [00:10:20] Speaker B: Amazing new space phone. That might be Lex Luthor's Lexophone from last episode. You can talk back and forth between houses from room to room and from secret hiding places because it's portable. That's just like the Lexaphone, right? [00:10:32] Speaker A: Right. Trick black soap. Did you notice that the guy who's using the trick black soap is looking himself in the mirror? And he has a little Hitler mustache. [00:10:41] Speaker B: I notice it now. Victim wash his face and gets blacker and blacker. Well, they weren't very racially sensitive either. Let's move on to the comic. Now, this eye, what he's looking at, folks, is the splash page where there's a giant eyeball floating in the room. [00:11:05] Speaker A: And they're doing this crime wave into the glory of Cyclops, which apparently is sort of organized up to the. [00:11:12] Speaker B: Yes, the eyeball Batman's tied down to. Oh, he's not even tied. He's just laying prone on the conference table. [00:11:19] Speaker A: That's because he was gassed. [00:11:21] Speaker B: Well, we don't know that yet. We're just on the splash page. [00:11:23] Speaker A: Oh, is that what that's called? A splash page? [00:11:25] Speaker B: Yep. That's a technical term. [00:11:26] Speaker A: Okay. [00:11:28] Speaker B: Eclipso and a woman dressed as a bee are there at the head of the table. And the Gangsters are all saying, Hail, Mr. E. I guess that's Eclipso. And the big eye, which is the big eye that's hanging in the center of the room. [00:11:44] Speaker A: Nice green eye. And they're doing this to the glory of the greater glory of Cyclops. And who is Cyclops? [00:11:54] Speaker B: Well, in this story, Cyclops is apparently an international criminal organization. It's never appeared before or since. So I guess we just have to take the word of this one story. [00:12:04] Speaker A: And apparently that that eye is an all seeing eye. Because, you know, everything that they say and do in front of this eye, they. They're afraid of some sort of retribution. [00:12:14] Speaker B: Yeah, I don't know. They could cover it with a cloth or something. [00:12:16] Speaker A: I would think it's a seeing eye and a hearing eye as well. [00:12:21] Speaker B: So then we have this redhead woman standing around the dock. [00:12:24] Speaker A: Queen Bee. [00:12:26] Speaker B: Oh, I turned the page. Sorry. Okay, but that's a big clue. That Queen Bee also has red hair. [00:12:32] Speaker A: Yes. [00:12:34] Speaker B: This woman's at the docks, she's about to be shot with an arrow, when all of a sudden, out of the Black Knight, Batman. [00:12:41] Speaker A: Batman uses a rope to stop the arrow mid flight. [00:12:45] Speaker B: Yep. [00:12:46] Speaker A: Which is astounding. Really. [00:12:49] Speaker B: These great sound effects on this page, too. Thung when the arrow is shot. And swish. When Batman catches the arrow, the woman faints, of course, because she's a woman. And then Batman grabs her and says, marcia, darling. And she says, batman, oh, love her. [00:13:07] Speaker A: And then they start kissing. [00:13:08] Speaker B: They start making out right there in the doc. Well, I've never heard of Marcia. [00:13:12] Speaker A: Never. [00:13:12] Speaker B: I don't think anyone else reading this comic for the first or millionth time had ever heard of her either. [00:13:19] Speaker A: But I love this, what he says at the bottom of the page, marcia, I can hardly believe it's you. But. But why was that Bow Buzzard trying to ventilate your beautiful torso? [00:13:29] Speaker B: Yeah. Can we take a minute? This is no Batman that I've been familiar with in my reading days. No, as far as his dialogue. Oh, he talks like. So, you know the beach movies with Annette Finicello and Frankie Avalon. And, you know, any adult character that was trying to be cool would talk like a teenager. That's kind of that mixed with the gangster from the 1940s. So this is what he would sound like. Marcia, I can hardly believe it's you, but why was that Beau Buzzard trying to ventilate your beautiful torso? [00:14:04] Speaker A: And of course she's saying, oh, Batman, it's been so long, so long since these strong arms held me. [00:14:13] Speaker B: Anyway, there's this whole Backstory about how Marcia was in love with a gangster and he stole a cat emerald from the museum. [00:14:20] Speaker A: And he's chased after by the. By the criminals from Cyclops. Yes. And he took a stray bullet. And she promised that she would take it back and deliver the stolen cat emerald. [00:14:33] Speaker B: Right. [00:14:33] Speaker A: Which she's now asked Batman to do for her. [00:14:37] Speaker B: She's doing this for her deceased lover, Nikki, who does have a fantastic death scene in flashback. Would you like me to perform it for you now? [00:14:47] Speaker A: Sure. [00:14:48] Speaker B: Here you go. Only your great driving eluded those Cyclops killers, baby. But I'm done for. A stray slug. Promise me. Put the emerald back. Keep my name clear. Make up for what I tried to do. Don't forget me. Don't forget Nicky, baby. [00:15:11] Speaker A: Oh, Nikki. [00:15:13] Speaker B: And the Oscar goes to Nikki. Then there's another flashback immediately following that flashback where we see how Batman and Marcia met. Yes, she was drunk up on the bridge in London. In London, in a cocktail dress and a fur coat. [00:15:34] Speaker A: Because she's a. She is a crazy Playgirl. Something I've never seen before. A word. I've never seen Playgirl. [00:15:42] Speaker B: Well, that's the name of magazine, isn't it? [00:15:44] Speaker A: Yes, but I've never seen one. Someone described as such, like, I've heard playboy. Wealthy playboy. [00:15:50] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:15:51] Speaker A: Play girl. [00:15:51] Speaker B: Well, they're trying to. For equality. Until this bottom panel, Batman grabs her off the bridge and spanks her while a newspaper photographer takes a picture. [00:16:02] Speaker A: Right. So I was bothered by this Batman spanking. Well, her. I just thought. I thought that was. I mean, that's one of the first things we have to apologize for to women about is this idea. [00:16:17] Speaker B: Now, are you more bothered by Batman saying, now, here's something you should have had a long time ago, or by the newspaper photographer who says, hoo, boy, what a picture. [00:16:29] Speaker A: I'm bothered by both things. I'm bothered by this woman who apparently is probably suicidal, teetering on a bridge, endangering the lives of the police that are trying to get her down from the bridge. And she, for some reason, she's bored. She's, you know, she's just. She has ennui. And Batman takes her off the bridge and then spanks her like a child. And I'm bothered by the photographer saying, you know, hoo, boy, what a picture. You know, I'm bothered because I was curious to see, like, where this came from, this idea of spanking women. And apparently it was pretty popular in the 1940s all the way up through the 1960s. We saw it a lot in movies, quite a bit As a matter of fact, by 1963, there were over 280 instances of women being spanked in films. And really it was the Hollywood and entertainment reacting to the idea of women becoming more and more liberated. And so it was a way of, you know, men in entertainment asserting their dominance over women, saying, well, sure, honey, you can, you can have your voting rights and you can work a job and do those things that you like to do. But ultimately we men are in control. And when you get out of hand, we're going to put you over our knees and spank you. [00:17:52] Speaker B: Yeah, well, I'm glad things have changed. Now that we don't, men don't try to control women at all anymore. Well, there's the headline. Batman humiliates famed Playgirl. They're in the Daily Blade, Gotham City. Daily Blade, famous metropolitan newspaper. [00:18:09] Speaker A: Right. So then he goes on, Batman continues on his crime fighting Brie, joined by. [00:18:15] Speaker B: None other than Marcia, who's of course now fallen in love with Batman in. [00:18:20] Speaker A: A full length fur coat. [00:18:21] Speaker B: Yeah, well, that's her crime fighting costume. [00:18:23] Speaker A: Toting a pistol. [00:18:24] Speaker B: Apparently she's got a pistol. She's a crack shot. She's following Batman around to help him fight crime. [00:18:29] Speaker A: But he tells her he doesn't want her to do that because she is a girl and crime fighting is dangerous. [00:18:34] Speaker B: Well, yeah, that's true enough. This, I'm trying to think of the timeline. This is probably before or right around the same time of the new Batgirl appearing, who also had red hair. But of course, there was a previous Bat Woman and Bat Girl who helped Batman fight crime. And he's always protesting because they were girls. He never wanted them to get into it. [00:19:01] Speaker A: So as we progress on in the flashback, he asks her to marry him in a way that's kind of interesting. She says, she says to him, darling, here I am so in love with you and I don't even know who you really are, except that I expect because she's a wealthy playgirl and manipulative and that she says, it's something like this, darling, here I am with you, so in love with you, and I don't even know who you really are. And he says, sweetheart, you don't know my secret identity the day you take my real name as my wife, Mrs. Batman. [00:19:39] Speaker B: Well, it's nice of him to offer that he's going to tell his secret identity the day that they get married. But do you know that the Flash got married without revealing his secret identity? [00:19:50] Speaker A: In comics. [00:19:51] Speaker B: In comics, yes. No, we'll get to that. That issue is actually one of our go go checked comics. We'll get to that eventually. But yeah, the only way that his wife found out he was a flash was because he talked to his sleep. Oh, yeah? [00:20:06] Speaker A: Was it he fast talking, gangster fast talking? [00:20:10] Speaker B: Well, like super speed talking. I don't know how she would have understood it then. Anyway, Batman agrees to take the emerald back to the museum as Nicky's last wish. He sneaks into the museum. There's this whole convoluted thing about he's got to swing over to an airplane, drop the emerald into an exhibit with a fishing line. Well, what do you think happens? [00:20:32] Speaker A: He uses the fishing rod still hidden in the cockpit when it was stolen. Did they not think, wait, there's no trace of a criminal. How was this stolen? Oh, let's look in the airplane. Up suspended from the ceiling up above the trophy case. [00:20:49] Speaker B: Look, if the police in Gotham City were on top of things, they wouldn't need Batman swinging around. So Batman is actually then arrested for stealing the Cat emerald because it turns up missing again. And they have photographic evidence of him lowering it or raising it. It's a photograph. We don't know. [00:21:10] Speaker A: How did they get that photograph? [00:21:11] Speaker B: They probably had a hidden camera in the museum. Or maybe if it's that photographer from the Daily Blade. Hoo, boy, what a picture. That man stealing an emerald. Batman goes to jail because he's a good citizen. [00:21:22] Speaker A: Right. He overhears Gorilla. What's the guy's name? Gorilla? [00:21:28] Speaker B: Gorilla Grimes. [00:21:28] Speaker A: Gorilla Grimes. [00:21:29] Speaker B: In the next cell, blah, blah, blah, Frankie Malone and Gorilla Grimes. Gorilla Grimes getting some orders because Mr. E arrives tomorrow night and meets Queen Bee at the Hive to make lots of honey. Well, they're really taking this all the way with the bee puns. So Batman realizes he's got to put a stop to this criminal enterprise. [00:21:53] Speaker A: But he's stuck in jail. [00:21:54] Speaker B: He's stuck in jail for now. We go to the criminal hideout, which is a new high rise that's been built in Gotham City. [00:22:04] Speaker A: Yes, I. So can we just talk about this high rise? [00:22:07] Speaker B: Well, yeah, first of all, it's called APIs Enterprises, which is, of course, about bees. [00:22:12] Speaker A: Yeah, APIs. Right. [00:22:14] Speaker B: We get an X ray cutaway of the high rise. [00:22:16] Speaker A: Do you see the helicopters and automobiles and. Yeah, crime class. [00:22:22] Speaker B: Crime class number three. [00:22:24] Speaker A: Right. This. They literally, like, they. They labeled it crying Class number three on the board. [00:22:30] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:22:31] Speaker A: As if, you know, we're going to university and make sure that you. What's on your period? What's in your period today? Oh, I've Got crime class from 11 to 12:15. [00:22:38] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, Jane. [00:22:40] Speaker A: Right. And then they have the range on the fourth floor and then weapons like tanks and such on the fifth floor. [00:22:48] Speaker B: Yeah, I think you'd put the tanks on the ground floor, wouldn't you? [00:22:50] Speaker A: They're kind of heavy. I mean, why would you put the crime class on the third level? Or I guess it's the fourth level. And the. And the range in between the helicopters and the tanks. Did they not think of this? Did they just crank these artwork out, like, just without really thinking about? [00:23:10] Speaker B: I. I don't have any explanation for it. I think the helicopters would want to be near the top floor and the tanks near the bottom tower. The tank's gonna get out of there. [00:23:20] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:23:22] Speaker B: Plus they're surrounded on either side by offices with people at desks talking. Yeah, those must be criminals, too. Unless it's all a front. Now we shift scenes for a minute to the ruins of a lost dream called Solar City. I'm going to be honest, I don't know much about Eclipso yet. We have some Eclipso comics coming up, though, in the podcast in the future, so hopefully we'll discover more about him. But apparently he lives in the ruins of a city where there's an eclipse happening. [00:23:57] Speaker A: So, of course, we don't know how, when we know what's about to happen right now, when it. When a clip, you know, Eclipso tears off from Bruce Gordon. Dr. Bruce Gordon. [00:24:07] Speaker B: Bruce Gordon. [00:24:08] Speaker A: We don't really know how they get from this place to where Eclipso is. You know, I mean, the bees come and carry them off. [00:24:15] Speaker B: Yes. Bee man burst in the ceiling. Actually, a weird bee being. [00:24:21] Speaker A: B being is what they're called. Yes. [00:24:24] Speaker B: Dr. Bruce Gordon is there with his girlfriend and her father. He's abducted. Actually, Eclipso emerges from his body and Eclipso is abducted. [00:24:32] Speaker A: Does he get lighter when Eclipso's gone? [00:24:35] Speaker B: You know, I don't know. That's a good question. [00:24:37] Speaker A: Because he has mass, right? [00:24:40] Speaker B: Has what? [00:24:40] Speaker A: Eclipso has mass. [00:24:42] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:24:42] Speaker A: And he can't fly, which is just weird. I mean, he has to be carried around by these bee beings, right? [00:24:47] Speaker B: Well, he's got other skills. [00:24:50] Speaker A: Seeing through a black diamond. [00:24:52] Speaker B: Yeah. So they take a clip. So to Gotham City. Queen bee is presiding over a meeting here with a giant eyeball behind her. They're ready to destroy their greatest enemy, Batman, who's safely tucked away in jail. And nothing can stop them. [00:25:07] Speaker A: Nothing. [00:25:08] Speaker B: And here comes Mr. E. How can we lose now? I'm just gonna put this out here. Also. This, this entire story could have happened just as effectively without Eclipso ever being a part of it. [00:25:23] Speaker A: Yes. [00:25:24] Speaker B: I. I don't know. Well, we'll get to that. Queen Bee flies off with some bee beings. [00:25:32] Speaker A: She has a jetpack. [00:25:35] Speaker B: Well, here's firing at the. [00:25:37] Speaker A: You see what's in her hands? She's got some, some. Some coiled wire or something in her hands. Do you see the bottom? What does she have there? Is it a. [00:25:47] Speaker B: No. They just raided rooftop party. And they're diamond necklaces. [00:25:51] Speaker A: Oh, this is diamonds. Oh, I see. [00:25:53] Speaker B: Or almost diamonds. Then we have Eclipso breaking open an armored car with the ray of light. Yeah, but that's from his. That's from his eclipse side eye because we can see him in. [00:26:06] Speaker A: Well, that's an inconsistency because later on when he makes Batman weakness with the. With seeing the through, with looking through the dark, the black diamond in his eclipse side, he goes to switch his hands over. Rather he goes to switch the diamond over from one hand to the other to look through his other eye to finish him off. Do you understand what I'm saying? [00:26:27] Speaker B: I do. Make me pay attention to it when we get there. So, like all good criminals, he's robbing armored car, rooftop socialite party and the ice cream cart at the baseball. [00:26:39] Speaker A: Yes. Full of cash, you know, but of course Queen Bee knew that that ice cart would be full of cash. [00:26:49] Speaker B: I guess. I mean, it just figures that the most cash at the baseball stadium would be in the 1 gallon ice cream cart. So there's a giant crime wave all over Gotham City. Batman's in jail. Or is he? [00:27:08] Speaker A: Well, he takes. He takes a hot wire. [00:27:11] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:27:12] Speaker A: And uses it to melt the. The bars of this prison cell. [00:27:17] Speaker B: Yeah, that would probably work, I guess. [00:27:19] Speaker A: I've never done that. [00:27:21] Speaker B: He tracks gorilla Grimes, who's also just gotten out of jail, to APIs Enterprises, the high rise where the criminal enterprise is happening. He gets captured, knocked out by gas. [00:27:33] Speaker A: Okay, could we just stop for a second and go back to the panel where Grimes presses a button and a spring loaded desk hurls across the room, throwing him Batman into a door where he crashes through and then into a. [00:27:49] Speaker B: Hallway where he is gassed from the mail slot. [00:27:53] Speaker A: From the mail slot. [00:27:54] Speaker B: Yeah, that's normal. [00:27:56] Speaker A: In the hell you have to be. It'd be like. You just have to know that you're going to have a villain chase you into this room. And you have to have them standing in just the right place. You hit the button and the desk shoots across the room and knocks that person through a door and into a room with gas. [00:28:14] Speaker B: Well, you have to assume if you're a criminal, that someone sometime is going to come after you. [00:28:18] Speaker A: So are we to assume that every room in APIs Enterprises has some sort of booby trap? [00:28:25] Speaker B: Yeah, I would if I was a criminal, wouldn't you? Booby trap everything. [00:28:29] Speaker A: And one more thing. [00:28:30] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:28:31] Speaker A: Looking at Eclipso in the bottom right panel. [00:28:33] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:28:33] Speaker A: Look how his face is. Is not quite right. The dark side, which is like the all gray side. His eyes open and he looks alert. [00:28:42] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:28:43] Speaker A: And then the other side doesn't look quite right. His eyes droopy. [00:28:46] Speaker B: Do you think he looks like Sam Donaldson? A little bit. He might have had a stroke. I mean, he's two men in one body. But that doesn't make sense because he's Split off from Dr. Bruce Gordon. I don't know how it works. [00:29:01] Speaker A: I don't understand. But you can clearly see that the eyes are different. [00:29:05] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:29:05] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:29:06] Speaker B: They throw Batman down a chute into the river. Because they have a chute that goes. [00:29:09] Speaker A: Right into the river, as one does. I suppose that's where they dump all the trash. [00:29:13] Speaker B: Well, or worse. [00:29:17] Speaker A: He gets onto a garbage barge. [00:29:18] Speaker B: Onto a garbage barge. And is shot at by the police. Because the police are. [00:29:21] Speaker A: So he dives back into the river. [00:29:26] Speaker B: Commissioner Gordon. [00:29:27] Speaker A: No relation to Dr. Bruce Gordon. [00:29:29] Speaker B: No, nor no relation to Bruce Wayne. Huh? Isn't that a funny coincidence? Is outraged that the police shot at Batman. They think he's dead. He just wanted him captured, not. [00:29:41] Speaker A: Not killed. No. [00:29:44] Speaker B: Dr. Bruce Gordon comes in, offers his help in fighting Eclipso because he knows a lot about Eclipso, being that Eclipso comes out of his body. [00:29:53] Speaker A: But he can't tell anyone. [00:29:54] Speaker B: No, of course not. Here we are back in the headquarters in APIs Enterprises, and there's someone crawling out of the giant eyeball. [00:30:03] Speaker A: So wait a second. Back up. Missed one thing. [00:30:06] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:30:07] Speaker A: Eclipso makes the move on Queen B. He grabbed her and she says, don't touch me, you freak. You murderer. [00:30:16] Speaker B: Well, I'm glad to see she's finally standing up for herself. So, a figure climbing out of the eyeball. So is the eyeball affixed to the wall? It's so hard to tell in two dimensional art. [00:30:31] Speaker A: It's not drawing well, really. I mean, if you look back at a panel, several pages, it looks like, like Queen Bee is holding up the eyeball with her hands. So it's hard to tell. But he does come in. I mean, I knew I have to tell you, I must admit, I knew when the person climbed through that that was Batman. [00:30:53] Speaker B: Well, it's because you're accustomed to how stories work and you know, you're getting towards the end, so. [00:31:01] Speaker A: I'm also not 12. [00:31:03] Speaker B: The art here is by J. Winslow Mortimer. Never heard of him. It's not awful art. Just some of the details are hard to understand. What's happening? A masked figure crawls out of the eyeball. Guess what? It's Batman. Who's wearing a mask over his Batman mask. [00:31:25] Speaker A: Well, and what's strange is that the head's rounded so we don't see the ears, the, you know, the bat ears. [00:31:30] Speaker B: At all until the mask comes off. [00:31:33] Speaker A: Right. [00:31:33] Speaker B: Then we see him clearly. [00:31:34] Speaker A: So are you soft? I mean, does the fabric. Is the. Is the weight of the fabric so such that his ears just fold down? Because I. Every, every Batman I've ever seen, his ears look pretty firm. [00:31:45] Speaker B: Well, on the TV show, which was about this time, they were very soft. [00:31:50] Speaker A: Okay. [00:31:51] Speaker B: In fact, they didn't really extend above the crown of his head, as I recall. Queen Bee. Batman recognizes her voice. It is Marcia. Of course. [00:32:02] Speaker A: Yes. And of course, I just want to say, if you're looking at this panel right here, where Batman in disguise is talking. Yeah. Eclipso looks really tired. He looks exhausted. [00:32:14] Speaker B: Well, I would be too. I think he can only operate during a solar eclipse or at night. [00:32:21] Speaker A: So look at his posture. He's all hunched over. His face is very drawn. He's exhausted. He doesn't look surprised or ready to kill Batman at all. He just looks like he needs a nap. [00:32:32] Speaker B: Well, he is trying to kill Batman. [00:32:35] Speaker A: So there. If you see in that part three, Batman versus Eclipso, he is now holding the black diamond over his light side, not his dark side. And he's shooting a beam at him. [00:32:49] Speaker B: Okay, I take your point. So Marcia now has turned soft. She's trying to rescue Batman. Eclipso goes after him. Here we are on the outside of the building. So he uses his cape for a short glide. Just enough to crash into the side of the building. [00:33:10] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:33:10] Speaker B: And grab. [00:33:11] Speaker A: Not enough to get to the ground. [00:33:13] Speaker B: No. And he does. You are correct. He has fingertip suction discs. [00:33:17] Speaker A: So somehow he managed mid flight as he's gliding from this, the skyscraper, down toward the ground to affix these end cap suction cups to each individual finger. [00:33:30] Speaker B: Yep, he's very quick. He's Batman. He knocks out some flying bee beings with a Batarang. [00:33:38] Speaker A: Good job, Batman. Yeah. But up comes from below. [00:33:43] Speaker B: On the Window washer. [00:33:45] Speaker A: Yeah, thing. [00:33:45] Speaker B: What do we call that? [00:33:46] Speaker A: Oh, it's here. He says what it is. [00:33:48] Speaker B: Well, he calls it the automated window cleaner car. I don't know that I've ever heard that. [00:33:53] Speaker A: Yeah, I'll get to it and say, oh, hook. A hook and ladder. No, that's not it. [00:33:57] Speaker B: No, they're calling the hook and ladder to get Batman off the building. [00:33:59] Speaker A: Right, yeah. [00:34:02] Speaker B: Blah, blah, blah. Fight, fight, fight. Dr. Bruce Gordon throws some kind of chemical grenade which makes a flash of light, to which Eclipso responds. Light, my nemesis. [00:34:17] Speaker A: You wanted me to call your attention to this. Aren't you looking at page 23? You see that eclipso saying, a blind bat. Now, the coward crusader can only cling and listen to the sound of the vehicle rushing toward him. Ha, ha, ha. He'll be a sitting duck from my energy bolt. Now, as he gets ready to switch the black diamond to his other eye. [00:34:38] Speaker B: Oh, okay. [00:34:39] Speaker A: Yes, yes, I see that on page 24. [00:34:41] Speaker B: Right. Forgive. Forgive. [00:34:43] Speaker A: Which is like, what is so stupid. I mean, honestly, you can't. DK doesn't have a ray gun. [00:34:49] Speaker B: He doesn't have. [00:34:50] Speaker A: He literally takes his black diamond and switches it from eye to eye. He can have glasses or two black diamonds. [00:34:57] Speaker B: I think if I were him, I would make some kind of bracelet or ring that had the black diamond in it. [00:35:02] Speaker A: So I could. [00:35:03] Speaker B: Because I. I would lose that if I were. [00:35:06] Speaker A: Yes, wouldn't you? He's going to fall. He'd drop it. Well, he takes the black diamond anyway and goes into the body of Dr. Bruce Gordon. [00:35:13] Speaker B: Yeah. So that's Bruce Gordon falls off of the hook and ladder truck as Eclipso is falling off the building in mid flight. They merge, and no one sees it. No one sees it because they're all blinded from the flash of light. [00:35:29] Speaker A: It's a good thing they caught him, even though they couldn't see him. [00:35:32] Speaker B: Well, it seems to me like Dr. Bruce Gordon was directing his fall in such a way that he landed perfectly on the thing. What do they call that when they have a giant trampoline? That they catch you off a building. You see it all the time on television. [00:35:47] Speaker A: Mm. [00:35:48] Speaker B: I'm just gonna call it a fire trampoline. [00:35:50] Speaker A: Okay, good. [00:35:53] Speaker B: Eclipso defeated. All is well. Batman, forgiven, gets the cat diamond back, and Marcia's disappeared. Right. [00:36:02] Speaker A: And notice that he's holding right panel on page 25 where it says the end. He's holding what is a white sort of, you know, face covering with the black mask. And, you know, she never had that over her face. [00:36:18] Speaker B: Maybe what we're looking at is the inside of the cowl that she wore. How would we know? Because the art is not clear. No, on that point, look here at the bottom of the page. An ad for the Go Go checks. [00:36:31] Speaker A: I see that. [00:36:32] Speaker B: Definitely coming. A brand new look. [00:36:34] Speaker A: But wasn't this already there? [00:36:35] Speaker B: Well, yes, of course. Otherwise we wouldn't be talking about it. [00:36:38] Speaker A: Exactly. Now, did you read the famous Foes through the Ages? [00:36:41] Speaker B: I didn't. I'm not much for too many words. [00:36:44] Speaker A: I know you aren't, but it talked about the. The basically talked about the history of foes throughout history. Sorry, no. The foes throughout history as great historical figures. So we talked about the Greeks and the fight between the Trojans and the Greeks, and then they went on to talk about Zoroastrianism and then the crusades of David and Goliath, and then ended up talking about Joe Lewis and the German veteran boxer Max Schmeling and the Nazis. [00:37:23] Speaker B: Well, are we learning so much? [00:37:25] Speaker A: We really are. [00:37:26] Speaker B: I'm a comic book. [00:37:27] Speaker A: I know, right? [00:37:28] Speaker B: Honestly, it's where I get all my knowledge. What, this. [00:37:30] Speaker A: This CAPS Hobby Center. [00:37:32] Speaker B: I don't read those things. [00:37:34] Speaker A: I don't even. I read it four times to try to understand it. What the joke was. He gets a little chemistry set. He tells his buddy, hey, I got a chemistry set. And he said, I'll be over in a little while. He said, gee, test tubes and everything. Shortly after, his friend comes in. He says, what are you making? Here, taste it. And he says, what's that? He says, taste what? Sure, it's only a chocolate milkshake. Is that a joke? [00:38:00] Speaker B: I don't know. [00:38:01] Speaker A: Well, I mean, if you read this in the 1960s, would you get it? [00:38:05] Speaker B: I don't know. That was before my time. I'll post that on our social media. You can find us all over social media. Just look for Gogo, Checkpod, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram. You know the drill. Anyway, let's move on to our next issue. [00:38:22] Speaker A: Oh, we're doing two in this podcast. [00:38:23] Speaker B: Yes, Certainly. [00:38:24] Speaker A: Awesome. Okay, but let me pull it up. Will you go ahead and start. [00:38:26] Speaker B: We don't want to be here for 10 years. So the next issue we're looking at is metal men number 18. Do you know anything about the Metal Men, Rob? [00:38:35] Speaker A: I know nothing about the Metal Men, and I was just livid within the first five pages of this comic. [00:38:44] Speaker B: Okay, good to know. It'll make for a lively conversation. Well, the Metal Men are robots who are invented by Dr. William Magnus, who, for Some reason wanted to make robots made of metal that could talk and do things. I don't know why he originally made them. [00:39:01] Speaker A: Can you hear Captain Butler over here licking himself. [00:39:06] Speaker B: Fantastic. Thanks. He's a prodigious liquor. He's have a whole house to be in. You got to be in this one. [00:39:11] Speaker A: Room right by the microphone. [00:39:13] Speaker B: So Doc Magnus, we call him Doc for short because it's the 60s and people respect scientists in the 60s makes these six robots. Gold, Mercury, lead, iron, tin and Platinum. [00:39:29] Speaker A: Wait, he didn't make Nameless. [00:39:32] Speaker B: He did not make Nameless. Nameless is also here. She was made by tin out of a build your own robot kit. So apparently, anyone in the DC universe can go make a sentient robot that can change shape into any form you please. [00:39:51] Speaker A: And those robots can make other robots? [00:39:54] Speaker B: Yes, yes. So why we're not overrun by robot overlords at this point, I don't know. [00:40:00] Speaker A: Well, I can't wait. [00:40:01] Speaker B: Maybe it's because they spend most of their time quarreling with each other. Do you, when you're reading, you have an internal narrative voice that's sort of doing the reading for you? [00:40:12] Speaker A: Yes, of course. [00:40:13] Speaker B: So in my head, everyone in this Metal Men comic is screaming all the time from page 1 to page 25, however many pages it's is. They're just yelling. [00:40:27] Speaker A: Tina is crying, mostly. [00:40:28] Speaker B: Tina is platinum. I don't know why they call her Tina, because to me, they should have called her Seem, like nameless. I know, I get it. I just don't. Maybe they should have called her Patty or Num num. [00:40:48] Speaker A: Can I just say something before we get into. [00:40:51] Speaker B: I stop you. [00:40:52] Speaker A: I hated every single page of this comic. Are we going to continue to look at this throughout the next as we. As we explore these. Yeah, I cannot wait to see how these brilliant characters continue to evolve, because it's literally just an entire comic book full of them yelling at each other while they happen to be fighting an enemy. [00:41:16] Speaker B: Yeah, that's. I mean, it's the 60s. I'm not expecting much evolution of character. [00:41:23] Speaker A: Okay, so it starts with this dinosaur. [00:41:28] Speaker B: Oh, well, let's the COVID first, because it's actually thematically very similar to the Brave and Bold cover, because they are also climbing up a building. [00:41:37] Speaker A: Oh, oh, right. Cover here. [00:41:40] Speaker B: Now it's Doc Magnus carrying Tina, who I remind you is a robot, and she's unconscious, made of platinum. [00:41:49] Speaker A: Right. [00:41:50] Speaker B: Now, I don't know how heavy platinum is atomically, but I'd imagine if there's a robot made of platinum, it's going to be heavier than a normal person could carry up a ladder. [00:42:06] Speaker A: Well, up a ladder. I have a ring that's made of gold. White gold. [00:42:10] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:42:11] Speaker A: I can extrapolate that. If I had an entire human being made out of my. My wedding ring, it would be pretty heavy. [00:42:19] Speaker B: Now furthermore, they're climbing up a ladder made of actual gold. Because the robot gold has turned himself into a ladder. Right now. Gold is soft and malleable. [00:42:32] Speaker A: Yes. Well, it depends. I'm imagining, because they're so there, I'm imagining that he can. He can actually alter his density because 10 karat gold is stronger than 14 karat gold. 14 karat gold is softer. [00:42:49] Speaker B: As the numbers increase, blah, blah, science. I don't know what you're talking about. I do know that below gold is mercury. Is the mercury who's forming part of the ladder. Mercury is liquid at room temperature. Who the character of Mercury in the comic is often heard to proudly say about himself. [00:43:07] Speaker A: Yes, metal. [00:43:09] Speaker B: That's liquid at room temperature. [00:43:10] Speaker A: And what's interesting is I'm the only. [00:43:13] Speaker B: Metal that's liquid at room temperature. Because everyone yells in this comic later. [00:43:17] Speaker A: On when they actually do climb the building. When you get to that scene when this happens, he's not part of the ladder. [00:43:22] Speaker B: Well, good, because that would be ineffective because he would turn to liquid the minute you step. [00:43:28] Speaker A: What? Someone else knew to draw the COVID. [00:43:32] Speaker B: Let me check my notes here. Cover artists Ross, Andrew and Mike Esposito. Interior artists Ross Andrew and Mike Esposito. [00:43:41] Speaker A: Did they not talk about it? Did they not sit next to each other at the desk? [00:43:45] Speaker B: They may have never even met. I don't know. They did everything through the postal service. [00:43:50] Speaker A: And this damn robot has red glowing eyes inside. Every time that the robot appears, it has white googly eyes. [00:43:58] Speaker B: Well, of course they didn't talk about that. [00:44:03] Speaker A: And it doesn't look this good inside the comics either. [00:44:05] Speaker B: No, Ross. Andrew, I remember being a principal artist on Wonder Woman comics in the 70s and 60s and 70s for some. I just, I don't like this art. I know that he's well respected. I think he's more respected as an inker than as a penciler. But it looks to me like. Have you ever seen when left handed people are forced to write like they're right handed and they have to like turn their whole body around the desk? You're left handed. You know exactly what I'm talking about. It looks to me like that, like he was on a right handed drawing board, but he's left handed. And so everything kind of Has a slant to it. [00:44:44] Speaker A: Yeah, it just looks a little off. Are you saying this drawing isn't what it ought to be? [00:44:48] Speaker B: Ha, ha. So I don't even know. There's so many flashbacks in this story. A robot dinosaur is destroying the city. You can tell he's a robot because he is making sounds like clank, clank and crash. [00:45:05] Speaker A: Well, and all of his joints are made of joint materials and rivets and hinges. And his hands are three little prongs that come out. [00:45:16] Speaker B: He's got little tyrannosaur hands, but it looks like maybe he can extend his arms out. Unlike a real tyrannosaur, the robot dinosaur is chasing the metal men down the street. [00:45:29] Speaker A: Right. [00:45:29] Speaker B: They are running from the robot dinosaur. [00:45:31] Speaker A: And quarreling, Quarreling the entire time about Tina's love for the doc and everybody telling her she's a stupid girl. And also the doc saying, how can your heart be broken? You don't have a heart. You're a robot. I made you. How are you crying? You can't be crying. You're a robot. I made you. [00:45:50] Speaker B: Yeah, you know what? Shut her off if it bothers you so much. She's crying. She's crying? Yes, at the bottom of page three. Well, if he made her, he must have died. [00:46:02] Speaker A: Do you see the tears in her eyes? [00:46:03] Speaker B: Yes. [00:46:04] Speaker A: What is she crying? Liquid platinum. [00:46:06] Speaker B: I don't know. Oil or lubricant of some kind. Silicone gel. Well, he must have built some capacity for her to cry in there. [00:46:17] Speaker A: And this is what used to make me angry about the Wonder Twins. They would form the stupidest things. [00:46:22] Speaker B: How did you drag them into here? [00:46:23] Speaker A: Well, because she, in order to stop the dinosaurs, turns herself into platinum. Barbed wire. [00:46:29] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:46:30] Speaker A: She couldn't have made herself into handcuffs or a speed bump, something that would. That would trip the dinosaurs. She turns herself into barbed wire or. [00:46:42] Speaker B: I don't know, maybe she could turn herself into a dinosaur. [00:46:46] Speaker A: Okay. A platinum dinosaur. Right. And then lead. Turns himself into a lead pipe, which then gets kicked out of the way by the dinosaur's tail. [00:46:55] Speaker B: Yeah, I. That's a very original, by the way. [00:46:59] Speaker A: Okay, while all this action is happening, they're all arguing all the time. All the time. [00:47:06] Speaker B: At the top of their lungs because. [00:47:07] Speaker A: They'Re at each other. It's like they hate each other. [00:47:09] Speaker B: Yeah. When I was growing up in the 1970s, the metal men appeared very infrequently. And I just always thought it was such a cute concept. Now, they weren't arguing all the time at that point. And they were handled by excellent Artists like Jim Aparo and Jose Luis Garcia Lopez. But yeah, this is not. [00:47:38] Speaker A: Nothing they do to this dinosaur has any effect whatsoever on the dinosaur. [00:47:43] Speaker B: No. Iron makes himself into a giant ball which bounces off the dinosaur. But he hurts Tin because Tin's useless. I'm sorry. [00:47:54] Speaker A: And goes through mercury. [00:47:56] Speaker B: Yes. Who's liquid at room temperature and makes a noise that goes. Is he singing like Bing Crosby? [00:48:06] Speaker A: Maybe. [00:48:07] Speaker B: Gold. [00:48:10] Speaker A: Turns himself into. [00:48:10] Speaker B: Turns himself into gold dust and then makes himself into a tornado. Well, how is that being powered? [00:48:16] Speaker A: I. Well, how did the. How did lead make himself into a cannonball and launch himself at? [00:48:22] Speaker B: Good point. [00:48:23] Speaker A: You know, he wasn't picked up by another one of the robots. He launched himself. So apparently they have supernatural powers in addition to being robots made out of one element. [00:48:37] Speaker B: I don't know. Somebody didn't think this through very well. [00:48:41] Speaker A: And then so doc gets in there and he says to her, he screams. I'm not going to scream. But don't waste time gabbing if you care about me and don't want to see a gilt edged corpse. Come on. I can't breathe. Gold dust. So did he say that all in one breath without breathing in? [00:49:00] Speaker B: Well, yeah, he had to. But he would have been faster because he was screaming. He's carrying platinum off in his arms. [00:49:07] Speaker A: Into a lead pipe. [00:49:08] Speaker B: Into a lead pipe. Who is Lead? The character. [00:49:14] Speaker A: She is. She is so singularly focused on him. She almost died and was rescued by the doc and she's still carrying on this conversation that she started pages ago. [00:49:26] Speaker B: You know what? I think she's a little codependent. [00:49:29] Speaker A: You think? [00:49:31] Speaker B: Well, he must have. I. He made her that way. [00:49:35] Speaker A: Why did he make her that way? [00:49:37] Speaker B: Well, maybe he wanted to be loved or something. [00:49:40] Speaker A: Well, he's not giving her anything. [00:49:41] Speaker B: Well, I know. So here we go. Oh, now the ladder is just, just lead. And they're all climbing up Lead. [00:49:50] Speaker A: Lead. [00:49:51] Speaker B: Now. Lead. A lead ladder would not be very effective. Am I correct in thinking that. [00:49:56] Speaker A: Well, lead is. Can be soft. Yeah, yeah. [00:49:59] Speaker B: Like pencil lead. [00:50:01] Speaker A: Well, I mean also, you know, you make bullets from lead. Yeah, it does has a. I think it has a low melting point and it shatters. [00:50:10] Speaker B: Yeah. I'm fascinated by this ad here before page seven in which a giant cat is visiting NBC TV and brings along a model of my mother the Car. Yes. [00:50:24] Speaker A: Is that a show? [00:50:25] Speaker B: My Mother the Car was a short lived sitcom starring Jerry Van Dyke. It's widely regarded as maybe one of the worst television shows ever appeared on television. Right. [00:50:37] Speaker A: Yet I've seen lots of advertisements for this cat in this car. [00:50:40] Speaker B: Well, they must have thought that it was going to be a big hit. So the premise is that Jerry Van Dyke's mother died and her ghost came back inhabiting the body of a 1920. [00:50:53] Speaker A: Something Model T. Like Stephen King's Christine, only funny. [00:50:58] Speaker B: Yeah, I mean, you can make a comedy of anything. Look at Hogan's Heroes. [00:51:02] Speaker A: Oh yeah. [00:51:03] Speaker B: Is this is Christine was his someone's mother? [00:51:09] Speaker A: I don't know. Don't even go there. I don't like most of the things that Stephen King wrote and I especially don't like his movies. Except for Carrie. I love that. [00:51:19] Speaker B: Well, who wouldn't like that? Plug it up. Plug it up. That sounds like a metal man script screaming at someone. Yeah, Climbing, climbing, climbing. And then we get a flashback. [00:51:30] Speaker A: Oh God, all the flashbacks. Okay, so this whole idea of the guy sitting around, he made these robots and they're sitting around playing, ignoring the female robot. The other female that was made by another robot. [00:51:42] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:51:43] Speaker A: And they're playing cards and apparently if you skip forward, if you just sort of think about it, playing card at this table for days. Days? [00:51:52] Speaker B: Why days? [00:51:53] Speaker A: Because she has enough time to go off and have the girl completely remade. [00:51:57] Speaker B: Well, if they were playing poker, that can go hours and hours. She just. They went to the car wash and she got a lube job. They didn't have her made over. [00:52:06] Speaker A: She looks all she. And she looks exactly the same. Except she's sparkling now. [00:52:10] Speaker B: Yeah. And she's got her hands on her hips like she's sexy. [00:52:15] Speaker A: Oh, she has no hips at all. [00:52:16] Speaker B: She's not. She's a tube with a giant head. [00:52:19] Speaker A: You know how like when we're growing up, when we're like 11 or 12, we just get all spindly and weird and then we hit teenage years and then we start to sort of become. We take on our gender forms, you know? Yeah. She looks like she's model after an 11 year old. [00:52:35] Speaker B: So Tin made a robot. [00:52:37] Speaker A: Yes. [00:52:38] Speaker B: For himself. [00:52:39] Speaker A: Yes. [00:52:39] Speaker B: To be a companion. And it's a prepubescent child is what you're saying. [00:52:44] Speaker A: Well, I mean, if you, if you really pay attention to the dialogue. They're all children, really. [00:52:48] Speaker B: Screaming children. [00:52:48] Speaker A: Screaming children. Oh, and ten's robot also stutters like Tin. Yeah, yeah. [00:52:56] Speaker B: So Platinum receives a charm bracelet in the mail that has a dinosaur charm on it that just starts growing giant into a giant dinosaur. [00:53:05] Speaker A: So it's. She has this bracelet, right? [00:53:07] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:53:07] Speaker A: This really bothered me. She has like everything on every page of this entire comic. She has this bracelet and then it just Grows into a. An enormous building sized robot. [00:53:19] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:53:19] Speaker A: That is powerful enough to withstand every attack that they take on this robot. I don't get it. It was. What's the science behind this? [00:53:33] Speaker B: Well, it's the same science of Power Rangers where they. Everything grows giant. Remind me to come back to that later because I have an issue at the end of the comic. Well, as the dinosaur is growing, Doc Magnus says, bah. Women robots, they'll say anything to break up the game. Ain't it the truth, Doc? There's giant robot attacking them in their spacious headquarters. I mean, they have like a domed ceiling. [00:54:10] Speaker A: Well, it looks like lax. Really. [00:54:12] Speaker B: It does a little bit. Maybe that's where they're headquartered. They did. I seem to recall they had a flying saucer at some point that they flew around town. [00:54:22] Speaker A: And don't you like how he tells. He tells different robots what they're going to do and someone steps up and does something else. No, no, I got it. You know, so Tin does it and he creates. I guess he makes a shield, which of course the dinosaur puts his hand right through. [00:54:37] Speaker B: So these robots that he created to not be emotional are across the board emotional and think for themselves. [00:54:46] Speaker A: Autonomous and highly emotional. [00:54:48] Speaker B: How is the world not overrun by robot overlords? [00:54:52] Speaker A: And of course they scream. [00:54:53] Speaker B: Always the screaming robot overlords. They one by one try to attack this dinosaur with no effect. The dinosaurs kidnaps Platinum. [00:55:06] Speaker A: Oh, no, no. She. No, she says to them, trust me, I got this. Then she takes him into the other room. Right? And then we're at the end of this. End of this particular installment because we have to have a little advertisement before we go to the next. Next part four. Right? [00:55:22] Speaker B: Yeah. I. I don't know what is flashback and what is not. [00:55:26] Speaker A: So she takes him into. She takes him into another room, which, as we go forward, we realize she's taking him into the kitchen, of course. [00:55:34] Speaker B: Because she has a woman robot where. [00:55:35] Speaker A: She feels most comfortable. Right, Right. And she's heating up pots and pans. And the dinosaur robot is eating these pots and pans as food. [00:55:47] Speaker B: That's not very clear in the artwork. [00:55:49] Speaker A: No, it isn't. But what I don't understand, which made me really angry because I kept getting progressively angry as I was. I. As I read this. [00:55:56] Speaker B: You need to work on some anger management. [00:55:58] Speaker A: No, I mean, honestly, I have to read this because it's our podcast and I just. I want to be challenged. And this was. The challenge was not getting angry. Not getting angry. It was that we will see that as this dinosaur is Eating these pots and pans as a air quotes meal. [00:56:15] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:56:16] Speaker A: It's a spaceship. [00:56:19] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:56:19] Speaker A: He throws them all inside and there are seats inside and he takes them to outer space. [00:56:23] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:56:25] Speaker A: Where did, where did the pots and pans go that were heated up? Is there a smelter inside? [00:56:30] Speaker B: Well, you can see. No, look in panel two. Here you can see them clank, clunk, clank down his gullet to where? Well, he's hollow, probably below the seats. Except for the rocket engine. This comes out of his tail. [00:56:47] Speaker A: I don't buy it. I, I think I do not buy it. [00:56:50] Speaker B: You're putting too much thought into this. Oh, now we're back to the present time. Because the robots chasing them down the street and takes them all and eats them all. Yes. [00:57:01] Speaker A: And they fall inside where they find out that they are no longer. They are not inside the belly of a dinosaur. And to meet their destruction, instead they are sitting down in comfortable chairs. [00:57:12] Speaker B: And look at those odd chairs. Those. I like those. [00:57:15] Speaker A: I like those. Well, that reminds me a lot of Star Trek. [00:57:17] Speaker B: Yeah, well, it was on at this time, season one. [00:57:20] Speaker A: And then where does he take them? Some unknown planet. [00:57:23] Speaker B: He slips through space. Let's see. It doesn't say what the destination is, does it? [00:57:29] Speaker A: The robot dinosaur can talk for the first time ever. [00:57:33] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:57:35] Speaker A: Right. [00:57:35] Speaker B: So apparently, and his master is also another robot that looks like a Brainiac type robot or an upside down scrotum. [00:57:46] Speaker A: Yeah. Yes. [00:57:49] Speaker B: So here we have another instance of a robot building another robot, both of whom are sentient beings and able to take over the world at any moment. [00:57:57] Speaker A: Yes. And he's captured a human and all the robots. [00:58:01] Speaker B: Yes. Because this head robot on this other planet is in love with platinum. [00:58:09] Speaker A: So if you turn to the next page, page 17, and you look at the top left panel of when the robot is releasing his captives. When I first saw this, I thought, because you see the angle and everything, I thought, what projectile is he releasing these captives from? [00:58:27] Speaker B: So it's his tail. [00:58:29] Speaker A: Yes. [00:58:29] Speaker B: But it's angled in such a way that it looks, looks like his tail is coming from between his legs in front of him. Yes. [00:58:35] Speaker A: He's shooting these people out of it. [00:58:37] Speaker B: Or ejecting. [00:58:39] Speaker A: Injecting. Yeah, ejecting into a. I think we. [00:58:42] Speaker B: All know where this is going. [00:58:43] Speaker A: Yes. Yeah. [00:58:45] Speaker B: Dumping the metal man into a hot molten vat of something. [00:58:50] Speaker A: Which would have to of course be an element of some kind. We don't know what it is. [00:58:53] Speaker B: Or a chemical. Chemical. Couldn't it? Well, it, it's hot and it's going to melt them. That's their greatest fear, that they're going to be alloyed. [00:59:05] Speaker A: They like their individual. They like their individuality. [00:59:10] Speaker B: Yes. Who wouldn't? [00:59:12] Speaker A: Well, because they can scream at each other. I suppose that if they're all. If they all become one robot, they will. All the screaming will take place in their heads. [00:59:20] Speaker B: See, that's another of my issues. You'd think that anyone, even in the 60s, would know what the word alloy means, which means one or more metals becoming a single new metal. That's not exactly what happens by the time we get to that. [00:59:40] Speaker A: No. They're just basically kind of glued together. [00:59:42] Speaker B: They're glued together like paper dolls. What do you call that when you cut out the paper doll, man, and it's an accordion with the hands stuck together when you pull it apart? [00:59:52] Speaker A: I don't know. [00:59:52] Speaker B: An accordion, Paper doll. [00:59:54] Speaker A: Yes. [00:59:55] Speaker B: That's what I'm calling it from now on. Doc and Tina are still out. I. I lost interest at this point. There's some nonsense with a fake Doc robot, an Android of Doc that the oh, my God. Chief robot implants his brain into. [01:00:14] Speaker A: It's all about how he kisses. [01:00:16] Speaker B: Screaming. The Android screams, too. [01:00:18] Speaker A: Yeah, you can tell by the bold text. [01:00:23] Speaker B: I don't want to invade Earth, Doc. That's for comics. I just want to invade one body. Yours sounds hot. So I can make that cute platinum babe fall for me and keep me from getting the willies on this crazy planetoid on which I was abandoned as a little mess of nuts and bolts when it was vacated eons ago. This is like a Kathy comic. There's so many words. [01:00:47] Speaker A: Lots of words. I would agree with you that as I was. As I was forced to continue turning pages, I was just thinking, oh, so many words. Ack. [01:00:57] Speaker B: That's from Kathy. I thought you would laugh when I did that, but I guess it wasn't as funny as I thought. The Android puts the moves on Tina. She realizes immediately that it's not Doc because he's putting the moves on her. [01:01:12] Speaker A: And she knows from his kiss. [01:01:14] Speaker B: Yes. [01:01:15] Speaker A: Yeah. [01:01:15] Speaker B: This kiss. This kiss, she. [01:01:18] Speaker A: I don't. And I didn't understand this. She finally gets him. [01:01:21] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:01:21] Speaker A: And then she pushes him away because it's not Doc. [01:01:23] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:01:24] Speaker A: And she said to me. And she said. She says, honey roses, silk. You never spoke like that to me before. I always tasted like a wet mirror to you. Cold, clammy. You're either sick or you're not. You can't be Doc. My Doc. What does she want? Does she really want. I mean, does she is does what she want from her Doc, just to always chase after him and never get him. [01:01:50] Speaker B: It might be kind of a little Nurse Chapel syndrome, who's always going after Mistress Bach, even though he can never love her in return. He didn't have a problem loving Uhura. The new timeline. [01:02:01] Speaker A: But. [01:02:03] Speaker B: Here comes the real Doc, we think now. [01:02:09] Speaker A: So this whole thing about the. About the robot taking over the real Doc's mind. Why didn't you just do that in the first place? [01:02:17] Speaker B: Like, he could have come to Earth. Right, is what you're saying. [01:02:20] Speaker A: Why did. Why did he have to. Why did he have to send his robot to Earth, have them eat all the rest of the robots and bring Doc and. I mean, it's this convoluted plot. [01:02:33] Speaker B: Yeah, well, they had 23 pages to fill, or however many. All right, he gives up on his scheme. He dumps Platinum and Doc into the hot molten stew where the other metal men have been dumped. And here they come all of a sudden, popping out in their alloyed with. [01:02:53] Speaker A: Their limbs glued together. [01:02:55] Speaker B: Now, it would have been really cool if they had formed some kind of a giant robot akin to the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers when all the Zords joined together. Yeah, which actually, in recent times, the metal men have figured out how to form that kind of giant robot. [01:03:13] Speaker A: Are they still as emotionally immature as these? [01:03:17] Speaker B: I think they have progressed a little bit. And in fact, at one point, Doc himself died and became a robot. So in their alloyed form, I'm putting Alloid in air quotes because it's just literally, their hands are stuck together and their feet like paper dolls. They fight the dinosaur and some other robotic creatures that are on this world. The robot sucks them back into his tail under orders to fly them off into deep space and abandon them. But the dinosaur, because he'd gotten such a good meal from Tina earlier in the comic, he takes them safely back to Earth. The end. [01:04:03] Speaker A: The end. [01:04:06] Speaker B: They still have their hands stuck together. We don't know what's gonna happen there. [01:04:10] Speaker A: No, but the writers did say, you know, we're working on it. We may have a solution. Now it's coming. [01:04:16] Speaker B: I don't care. I hope they're stuck together forever and they just stand around, scream at each other. [01:04:22] Speaker A: I'd pay to see that. Would you? Just like, you know, I'd Pay to read 27 pages of them screaming at each other. [01:04:28] Speaker B: Well, in a few another weeks, because we'll get another issue. Well, that's all for this time. You can find all about us on our social media sites. Just look for the hashtag GoGoCheckPod. Or you can go directly to our podcast website, Checkeredpast. Podient. CO. That's P O D I A N T CO. I guess that stands for Colorado or something. Or company. [01:04:56] Speaker A: I don't know. [01:04:57] Speaker B: I don't know what CO means. If you do.com, that's something very different. You won't find us. Well, we'll be back next week with adventure comics number 341, a very pivotal issue in the history of the legion of superheroes. [01:05:11] Speaker A: Really? [01:05:12] Speaker B: Yeah. Cool. Okay, bye for now. [01:05:15] Speaker A: Bye.

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